Female Advice Preferred: Pregnant and broken hearted.

katychristina · **Pregnant and broken hearted. -** July 29th 2011, 04:59 AM

I'm 16 weeks pregnant, a few weeks ago my boyfriend (not the father) broke up with me because he didn't want to be a father figure. We were in love and so happy but he just couldn't handle it, now I blame the baby for our break up and am really breaking down. They say it gets better but it's getting worse, I'm worried I'm falling back down the depression path.

guillotine_blades · **Re: Pregnant and broken hearted. -** July 29th 2011, 03:01 PM

I suggest you talk to your midwife or OB about this. As well as possibly a counselor. As a mom, I look at your situation and think "Its not the baby's fault he wasn't ready to man up" Trust me, now is not the time to be concerned with guys, spend the next few months enjoying your pregnancy and then just enjoy your baby. Good guys are out there that don't care if you have kids. I met my fiance when my son was a little over a year old. (I spent my entire pregnancy split up from his father, then we got back together before he was born and then divorced when he was 6 months old) I spent the time in between my ex husband and my current fiance just enjoying being a mom to this wonderful little boy, then when I least expected it this great guy just fell in my lap. It will happen for you too, when the time is right. Just take this time to adjust to the fact that you are about to be a mom.

Angel · **Re: Pregnant and broken hearted. -** July 30th 2011, 04:05 PM

Hey there,

I'm really sorry to hear about your break up. It's must be really hard for you to deal with this while you are pregnant. If you are feeling depressed and are concerned that you may be a danger to yourself or the baby, you should speak to your midwife or whoever provides care for you now. Your first priority right now is to look after yourself and your baby. It's really such a shame that he could not stick around, but you and your child deserve someone better than that. Try to focus on yourself for now and take things easy.

I wish you the best. Take care. ♥

-Sylvie

Guile · **Re: Pregnant and broken hearted. -** July 30th 2011, 07:13 PM

You could opt out of the pregnancy, considering you have less then halfway completed?

Stargazed. · **Re: Pregnant and broken hearted. -** July 31st 2011, 02:21 AM

Hey,
Sorry things aren't working out for you very well

As for blaming your baby for the breakup, it's not his/her fault. It's your ex's for not wanting to be a father figure; it's a shame that he couldn't handle it.
But you and your baby deserve better. And you will find that whether it's in 2 weeks, 2 months, or even 2 years. You'll be okay. Stay strong.
-Brittany

blumemusik♫ · **Re: Pregnant and broken hearted. -** August 1st 2011, 08:05 AM

Hi there.

It is really sad that your boyfriend didn't want to be the father figure for your baby, but it's really not the baby's fault. At this point, I suppose you have three options.

a) Terminate the pregnancy (but as you're so far along, this would be really messy :/),

b) Find another father figure for your baby, ie try going out with someone else, or even just have a close male friend that could be your baby's 'dad', or

c) Carry on as you are, and try and manage without a male influence. It may be slightly harder, but if that's what's best for you and the baby, then it's a challenge worth doing.

If you really genuinely feel depressed, then I advise you to talk to whoever it is that's taking care of your pregnancy (midwife, doctor etc.) and they should be able to try and get you some treatment so you don't become a risk to yourself or your child.

I hope things work out!<3