Pregnant Friend

[atelyn-kayy]

Just today I found out that a really good friend of mine is pregnant.
It's her ex boyfriend's, they've been off and on for years. She's in
a horrible state right now, confused, horrified. What makes things worse is she's one of those girls that is
constantly called a slut, or whatever people may choose. Word in our school gets around pretty quick, so the effects of that might sting.
Truth is she's a great girl who's been misguided this past year. Anyway, she's scheduled an abortion.
Thing is, I've told her I'd be there for her for anything. If she needed something or
needed to talk, I'd be there. It just feels like that isn't enough. I know being 15 and pregnant is already tough, but going through a procedure like that
is horrifying in itself. I just want to know what I could/should do, or shouldn't do
in this sort of situation. If you've been in the same boat or have advice, I'd
really appreciate it.

Thanks

[udontno]

Katelyn, if she is getting an abortion I don't see why she has to let anyone from school know. If I was you, I would have a talk with her. Going through an abortion can be traumatizing for some people. Try to help the best you can. If she's sure that this is the decision that she wants then all you can do is support her through it. If you would be comfortable with going along with her, I would offer to. Personally, I'm not sure if I would be comfortable with that but if I was to have an abortion (I personally wouldn't, but for the sake of "what ifs") I think I would like to have a close friend or my partner there for moral support. Does the exboyfriend know about the pregnancy?

I have several links that could be useful for you. This link is about how to support a friend who is getting an abortion. This link is about what to expect if you are getting an abortion. Giving your friend these resources could be useful if she decides to go through with this abortion. Here is a link that could be useful to her if she is questioning whether or not she wants to go through with this process. This link will tell her what to expect after she has an abortion. Finally, you might want to check out abortion laws area. This site has teen abortion laws in the US.

I know I just threw a bunch of links at you, but I hope they are of some use. I've never had an abortion before nor have any of my friends, so I'm unable to give any practical advice based on experience. Hopefully these links will be of some use to you and your friend.

[abbyxoxo95]

Your friend must be completely horrified and I would be too. The thing is if you really get through to her and getting her to keeping the baby alive, you might want to persuade her to having an open adoption so that she doesn't have to support the baby, but she can still see it. This would probably be the best idea for a 15 year old girl. If you watch the Secret Life then take some of the advice they give on that show. It may really give you some ideas of how to help out your friend in her time of need. I hope this helped Keep us posted on what you decide to do!

[mommieof2]

just make sure she knows you are there for her...and that she isnt alone in her situation...try not to tell anyone that way word doesnt get around about it..people in high school are horrible...i remember all that.

[BrittneyNicole]

Just be there for your friend. If she is planning on having an abortion, she doesn't really need to tell anyone. Don't talk about it to anyone and just be there for her.

[Pessimistic Panda]

Like everyone said be there for your friend there's not much more you can do.

[ilovestarryskies]

Like they said, stay by her side. She is going through a lot and would really need someone there for her.