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Sex and Puberty For questions related to sex, puberty, birth control and sexual health, ask here!

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Question Fingering... - November 21st 2010, 04:24 PM

Soo I'm pretty sure I'm going to get fingered soon.. haha. Soo I wanna know how it all goes. I don't want it to be awkward. What exactly will the guy do? What am i supposed to do while I'm getting fingered? Do we make out? Two of my close friends recently got fingered but they really didn't explain it to me that much. What if it hurts? I reallyy don't want it to be awkward, especially since I've never gotten fingered before and this guy has fingered girls before so he has experience. Helpp!!


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Last edited by Gaia; November 21st 2010 at 10:15 PM. Reason: Moved to Sex and Puberty [:
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Re: Fingering... - November 21st 2010, 04:47 PM

xD First of all, this thread might have been put in Sex and Puberty board... but as a answer to your question, It does not hurt unless he is doing it incorrectly. You should know if he is if it does not feel right to you. The only way to fully know how it is, is to experience it yourself. Every girl's fingering experience is different.

If you feel comfortable enough, you CAN make out.... it's hard to just TELL you what to do, since what you want to do will come to you at that moment. So if I told you to kiss this guy while he does this, you are most likely going to do something different.


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Re: Fingering... - November 21st 2010, 08:50 PM

I think for you to get answers to your question you just need to experience it. It's not a bad thing and it happens to a lot of people. Just make sure he takes it slow and isn't too rough with you, then it won't hurt. If he's doing a good enough job, you'll be fine to just sit there and enjoy it. But if you want to kiss too, then do that.

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Re: Fingering... - November 21st 2010, 08:52 PM

It shouldn't hurt or be uncomfortable and if it is, let him know and see if there is something you can do to make it better for you because it's about your enjoyment. As for what to do during, just go with the flow and with the moment, if you want to kiss, kiss and so on..
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Re: Fingering... - November 22nd 2010, 02:18 AM

It all depends on the guy. With me, my boyfriend knew better then to go far in with his finger the first time, and to gradually work me up to it. But the first time he actually went in, it kind of hurt. While getting fingered, I think it depends. Usually, my boyfriend will be fingering me with one hand, groaping my boobs with another, and he'll have his ear next to my face, so he can hear me moan... We don't make out too much durring it. But if he's going too far, too fast, or too hard, tell him. He WANTS to make you feel good... He won't want to hurt you. Just try to stay relaxed, and have fun.


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Re: Fingering... - November 22nd 2010, 02:22 PM

Keep in mind that he wants it to feel good for you. It doesn't matter that he's fingered other girls since all girls are different in what they like.

Feel free to teach him to do things for you that you like, and if you're too shy to tell him you can just show him by putting your hand on his and moving it they way you want. Usually it's the same way you masturbate yourself.

You don't have to do anything that hurts and remember he doesn't want to hurt you so stop him if it hurts you. I think if you can get a finger or two in your vagina it will make your first time having sex easier so you might want to work toward that goal.

Be sure and tell him that's all you want to do because some guys think if a girl will let him finger her she'll let him have sex with her. It's ok to have limits and he'll respect your for it.


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Re: Fingering... - November 22nd 2010, 09:16 PM

If it does hurt, let him know. Don't do what doesn't feel comfortable for you!
Also, you don't really need to do alot, just lie there
You can make out, I usually do, but you don't have to. There's no set way to do this
To be honest, if you and this guy are comfortable with eachother, then it shouldn't be awkward, you'll know if it's what you want


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Re: Fingering... - November 24th 2010, 02:14 AM

Well as it is you have never been fingered before maybe you should try it out before he does it .....
Tell him what feels good and what hurts etc.
Good luck and enjoy


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Re: Fingering... - November 24th 2010, 04:10 AM

Also, dont get too worked up about it before hand, or go at it with expectations, otherwise you may be too stressed to enjoy it. If he knows its your first time, then he'll probably take it slow.

Don't be scared, as said to instruct him, verbally or phsycially,but don't critise him. If he does something you like, encourage that. If he does something you don't like, be constructive like, 'Its a bit sore here, but I really like what you were doing just before'. Or if you don't want to actually say anything, because you feel weird doing it or what not, you can use noises. Like when he gets a spot you like, moan a little. It'd send the same message as a compliment.

At the end of the day, he wants to get you off, and he may be nervous too, and his expectations are on himself, more than you. Let him lead it if he's done it before, and you are unsure.

If the feeling hits you, making out is ok, not making out is also ok. Be relaxed, and aim to have fun. Remember, it doesn't have to be perfect, in fact, it rarely is. Being light hearted (but not comical), can really help break the awkwardness. It's meant to be fun and enjoyable. Not serious and too the point.

And if you feeling like you are reacting, maybe with heavy breathing, or even moans, don't be scared to express that. It's a real turn on when you are fingering someone and they are reacting, it tells you that you are doing it right.

The guy will hopefully explore you down there, as well as put his fingers inside of you. If he doesn't automatically, encourage him to massage around first, such as exploring the clitoris, etc. Just poking a hole (mind the bluntness), isn't going to be as enjoyable.
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Re: Fingering... - November 24th 2010, 04:20 AM

The best thing to do is to not worry about it and just let the moment happen. It shouldn't hurt, but if it does make sure to say something to him. If your really in the moment, it wont be awkward. Good luck!


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Re: Fingering... - November 24th 2010, 11:34 PM

i was always really worried about it and i was in fact fingered for the first time on monday (completely unexpected) all i can say is go with the flow (we made out on and off but it doesn't mean u have to) and make sure u tell him if he hurts you, the guy i was with had also been with girls before. relaxing and enjoying yourself def helps, i was a bit tense at first and it made it slightly painful but once i relaxed i really enjoyed it


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Re: Fingering... - November 25th 2010, 12:04 PM

my gf does it to me as i do it to her


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