Female Advice Preferred: Maybe something is wrong with me.

All of my friends have had sex and I haven't. I don't think I'm ever going to have a guy ask me. I guess something is wrong with me.

[jeff42]

no nothing is wrong. sex is a special thing. pm me if you want to talk! and register too! this site is a great place to make friends and get advice!

[Everglow.]

Hey

Thank you for reaching out! I agree with the post above in that there's absolutely nothing wrong with you for not having sex yet. There's a lot of pressure on people to be having sex, but just because your friends are, doesn't mean you need to be. I am 26, and I know many people my age who haven't had sex. None of them have anything wrong with them either. Your value as a person doesn't depend on whether you're sexually active, or whether a guy has asked you to sleep with him.

I hope you're doing okay.

[Rivière]

I don't know how old you are, but sex isn't a defining factor of everything. Just because you haven't had sex doesn't make you any less of a person. It doesn't mean you're unattractive or that a guy doesn't want to be intimate with you. It's good to take your time and find someone who enjoy spending time with personality-wise before becoming intimate.

If you're young, you have so much time ahead of you. Like Hollie, I know quite a lot of people who still haven't had sex. I've known people in their mid 20-s and even in their 30's who still haven't had sex. It's not because they don't want to, but because they want to take their time and be with the right person.

[Mallika]

Hello there,

Thanks for reaching out. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. Nothing at all. I'm 23 and I've never been in a relationship, let alone have sex. Most of my friends have been there done that. While I have experienced FOMO (fear of missing out) in the past, I've come to realise that each person has their own journey to live. We all don't operate at on the same timeline. Some people find love, get married, have kids by age 21. On the other hand, others remain virgins right into their thirties. There is no right timeline one should live through; it's simply not possible for all humans to have similar trajectories or experiences.

Unfortunately, mainstream media and pop culture stigmatise virgins a lot, making us feel like we're worthless. That couldn't be further from the truth. On the other hand, making sex mainstream and casual is dangerous. Sex should be a special thing, but in today's time and age, it has been trivialised and normalised so much that its charm is no longer appreciated by young folk. I see my friends sleeping around every week with any Tom, Dick and Harry, and while I am not a saint to judge them negatively, I can't help but think that they will never experience what it is like to have sex with someone they truly love.

My suggestion is that you cherish your life and its experiences for what they are. It's okay not to have the same experiences as your friends. It's okay to still remain a virgin or be single while everyone is hooking up. You can be you, you can be unique, and that's absolutely fine.

Your time will come in the future, so you can wait for it till it happens. Till then, don't forget to cherish the present

[cindy is here]

I think you are ok. You dont Have to do it if you dont want.

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]Hi there! I know I’m a little late on the reply but still wanted to share that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you! In fact, you are perfect for being true to yourself! There is no timetable for sex. I’m in my 30’s and have wanted to wait to experience it in a loving, special relationship. Always follow your inner voice as your guidance system and not what others are doing around you. Being true to yourself will bring about your magnetic energy.[/size][/color][/font]

[Astro04]

Ha! Story of my life.

[yungstunna]

hi there! :>

there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. sex is a very special thing - if it's done with a person you're really close to and care about, then it's such an amazing experience. if it's done with someone that you're not very close to and don't know very well, then it's usually not as good of an experience as it could be. i suggest that you wait until you've found the right person (someone you can trust), because then your first experience would be a very nice feeling.

don't feel pressured into sex, either. certain things aren't for everyone right away, and it really does take time for people to open up to new ideas and experiences.

of course, it's ultimately your choice in the end of what you'd like to do. just be careful, though - try and pick the right person you're most comfortable with. if someone tries to do something you're not comfortable with, don't be afraid to tell them that you don't want to do whatever they're trying to do, because your comfort is more important than their immediate gratification. that goes both ways too! if you suggest something and the other person wouldn't like to do it, then acknowledge that and try something else.

i hope this maybe helps :>>

I don't know how old you are, but I know it can be frustrating to be the last one of your friends to experience something that seems to be a group experience already. But if it helps, I assure you each and every one of your friends was just as nervous and insecure as you before they started having sex. You are not alone, or weird for being the "last one."

Sometimes, honestly, being the last one can have an advantage, if you look at it the right way. If you've never had a sexual experience, it can be incredibly difficult to initiate or ask for what you want. But consent and sexual empowerment is incredibly important, and the earlier we learn that, the better sexual experiences we'll have. The same principle can also apply to all areas of life, which is beneficial to creating overall happiness with ourselves, our lives, and our choices.

Instead of waiting for a guy to ask you, and just do it with the first person who asks, I suggest you think about what you want, and take your time. Many guys earlier in their sexual experiences are more concerned about the experience than the person they have it with, unfortunately. There is no shame in going slow, taking your time getting to know someone, and then communicating openly and honestly about what you both want before proceeding. I've found that to be a more beneficial approach for people of all genders and sexualities, quite honestly.