TeenHelp - Triggering: They said

First they called it D-D- N-O-S
With motor tension, inappropriate guilt
And social anxiety
It was not major enough for them to believe my losses affected me

Then they said no history of trauma
It wasn't severe enough to say, cause
getting beaten with hangers were normal back in the day

There may be some attachment issues
They speculated as a side note
But never thought to investigate
Hey, I'm used to that already

It isn't medical neglect
Becsuse her parents neglected themselves
It isn't physical neglect because she is an adult now

Then they said "she felt hurt by a friend"
Rather than a sexual assault
She claimed it wasn't violent
So they said it wasn't important

They said there was no more physical abuse
So she is safe in her home
Then the physical abuse came back
They said no objects were used
And she wasn't injured that bad
They asked if he was drunk
If she did anything wrong?
She said he thought it was a joke
He was only playing, so
they all played along

They said it was only scratches
And the blade was dull anyway
They said it was just one bloodied tissue
There were more important emergencies that day

No domestic violence shelter would take her case
It is between parent and adult child
Just get a job. Just move out. "Be brave"
"It is your choice" they told her
She heard those words before
When dad said it was her choice
To be loved, to be treated right.

They told her, nothing bad happened
You have a brain imbalance
She heard that before.
When he said she overreacted
When he said he can do whatever he wants
Because she lacks good judgement and doesn't know right from wrong

When he said no one agrees with you
No one thinks you're saying the truth
When he said he will never talk to her
Becsuse he doesn't like liars
"It is your choice how you're treated"
Next time don't lie"

"Don't be abrupt" they said
"Take your time, save up."
"The shelter is not a nice place to be"
"At least your family loves you, you just cant see"
"Your family loves you deep down"
"They care, they just have a weird way of showing it"
"Fix yourself and it will fall into place"
"It is all your choice"
She had heard that before

"Everything is my choice" She realized
"And by default, everything is all my fault."