TeenHelp - Triggering: i miss you from now

I miss spending time with you
I miss having tea and conversations
I miss playing chess and bike riding
Our time wasn't perfect but I appreciate it for what it was
Even if you couldn't do for me, what I needed you to
I appreciate you for who you are,
The imperfect human that you are,
As painful as my childhood had been.
As much as I feel betrayed by you and others.

I miss what the future could have been
I'm feeling the loss from now
You're leaving me, my sisters, our cat
And I don't know when, or
if you'll ever come back
I miss everything that didn't happen,
Everything that could've been,
But, I miss the hope and vision we may never make happen
and the infinite possibilities of making memories
Giving another chance to grow as a family
All I see is a single road of defeat
I am foreseeing the pain so strong,
I feel so weak
You haven't even left yet, you'll be leaving in a few days
I ruminate the past and anticipate what's next
I'm losing my sense of "why live?" all over again
If I strengthen my sense of "why", I,
can endure the how
But the image in my head is that I may never see you again
I am breaking down
I am dreading the minute you leave the front door
I've felt you were missing all along,
you're really leaving after all
I already miss you and youre sitting near me
You just spoke to me, you said I need to clean my room
But I feel like you're already gone
I miss you from now