So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

It's probably really bad but yeah can you tell me what you think?

1 cut 2 cuts 3 cuts 4,
Watch the blood drip on the floor.
5 cuts 6 cuts 7 cuts 8,
Try to keep your vision straight.
9 cuts 10 cuts 11 cuts 12,
further into her mind we will delve.
12 cuts 11 cuts 10 cuts 9,
Try to cut a nice straight line.
8 cuts 7 cuts 6 cuts 5,
She doesn't want to be alive.
4 cuts 3 cuts 2 cuts 1,
Now her pulse just sits at none.

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

It is pretty good. Great flow to it :) keep it up.

Jay.

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

I like the repetative rhythm with the numbers.

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

I like it too. I agree with Total Light Storm.

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

I like how you counted up AND down, and the repativeness and rhyme to it. :)

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

ahh thank you :)

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

Re: So I wrote a poem type thing at like 4am last night
 

thank you :)