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Homosexuality and Religion -
April 11th 2013, 05:50 PM
I wrote a piece to explain various aspects about being gay/lesbian.Id love to share it with whoever is interested. Just send me a message and i'll email it to you.
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Re: Homosexuality and Religion -
April 11th 2013, 05:55 PM
Maybe this will be easier.
Being homo- or bisexual can be a horrific thing to cope with if you don’t know anything about it and are too afraid to talk about it. And if you’re religious it’s just so much worse. The condition can lead to great heartache for the individual. From what I’ve learned I’m going to try and explain the concept of homosexuality in a way that is easy for a person of either orientation to understand. This piece of literature is aimed primarily at the gay individual to give perspective and understanding.
I first discovered I was gay when at the beginning of puberty. Our family was at the Cape Argus Cycle race. I remember we were walking through a CNA and whilst my father and brother where paging through sports magazine I found myself drawn to the cover photo of a male fitness magazine cover of a shirtless guy. I was shocked when I realized I was aroused. At that time it was very confusing. During the years that followed I became more and more aware that I only became aroused when I saw an attractive male. Then, one day, I heard that this “thing” I’m confused by is called being gay. Unfortunately my father, at that stage was bit of a homophobe, and had discriminating comments that I would have to bear; it really hurt me. This made it very, very difficult for me to tell anyone since I thought everybody had the same opinion. When I got into high school I encountered a whole new way of the thinking. Some students where openly gay and not many frowned upon it. But I tried to stay closeted fearing that they would not approve of my sexuality. I told a few of my closest female friends and they laughed and said the already knew and that I really shouldn't worry. Next thing a new they had told their boyfriends and the shocker was that they welcomed me into their circles. After these happenings I had enough courage to do some of my own investigation. I’ve spoken to those who are really knowledgeable in their particular field, for example: Psychologists, Psychiatrists, Theologians, Philosophers and Neurologists. The following is what I learned from them and I hope it will help you or someone you love.
You may have heard the term “congenitally homosexual”. Simply put, it means the individual was “born gay”. A common response to a person saying they’re gay is often: “well it’s your choice”, but is it? Would the person willingly choose to put him/herself through possible discrimination, depression, and anxiety etc. for some reason? No, there are various attributing factors to being gay. Genetics and psychological factors play a great roll.
People will always have something to say about anything that’s out of the norm; the irony is however that homosexuality is, and always has been, part of humanity and is normal. Ten percent of the world’s population is gay, bisexual or transgender. If someone where to say to me that they don’t know any gay people I’ll ask:” Well don’t you know more than 10 people?!” That’s not, mathematically, completely accurate but it does get the point across. Homosexuality is found in the animal kingdom as well. You find apes that just “like” other apes of the same sex. Thus it isn’t confined only to humans and psychology might not be the only cause for a person being gay. This is not mentioned to spark a debate over creationism vs. evolution; it’s just to say that homosexuality does also occur among amongst animals and thus there can be a physiological and not only a psychological reason for the occurrence.
The time where are living in, fortunately, is much more liberal than previous era’s. “Coming out” won’t cause a stoning. Your friends will, more than likely, commend you for having the courage to “come out” .If they do not, well remember they are also entitled to their opinion. Also, don’t feel everybody has to know. If you think your parents are going to throw you out of the house as a result of saying you’re gay, then rather wait until you’re out of the house .But after that it’s quite liberating experience being “accepted”.
Whilst doing research for this piece I came across many articles which claim to be objective. For example, when it came to the physiology of the homosexual brain. Most of them had a subtle undertone of being bias. One claimed that there is no difference between the heterosexual- vs. the homosexual brain and that the only real autopsy showing a comparison was that of a patient with a disease which alters the brain-physiology. Firstly I cannot believe that there has been only one autopsy ever done one a homosexual’s brain, secondly; later in the article you read that the person had AIDS and that HIV is referred to as a “homosexual disease”. The group’s intention was to stir doubt into an already sceptical society and they thought they could use the field of medicine as a platform for voicing their misinterpreted opinions. Fortunately there has been enough real medical research to prove their “findings” as complete nonsense. The only reason I’m mentioning this is that I would like you to be aware that you shouldn’t take one opinion concerning homosexuality and run with it. There are definite differences in various areas of the brain of a homosexual vs. a heterosexual .Take your time and do your own research. At the bottom of the above mentioned article I saw the web-address, it was a cult-like group of Christians (I’m not discriminating against Christians; this as I say was a cult, they are not your general Christian) who twisted and lied about scientific facts to suit their own philosophy. Be weary of random articles claiming to know the ins and outs of science and/or theology.
It should also be understood that there is a difference between homosexualism and homosexuality. Homosexualism is the act of a person sex having sex with someone of their own gender; there are various types of this. The participating individuals could be heterosexual, but for various reasons may partake in same-sex sex. An example would be men in the army who become “sexually starved’ and resort to pleasing each other. Homosexuality however is different. The individual is attracted to the same sex and not the opposite. They can picture a long term relationship with someone of their gender .And of course loving the person. Bisexuality means that the individual can be sexually attracted to either sex.
Bisexuality can be very confusing to a person. They sometimes feel that they don’t know whether they want to start a relationship fearing that they might start craving a relationship with the other sex more than the existing one. But usually the attraction to one gender will be stronger and will he/she will choose to move into a relationship with that gender. From a psychological viewpoint sexuality can be interpreted on a scale of 1 to 7. 1, being heterosexual and 7, being homosexual. The minority of the society is purely a 1 or 7. Most would be a 2 or a 6, but the bisexual is a 3 or a 4.
Homosexuality and Christianity
This is the one subject I struggled with the most, but my worries where completely unnecessary.
Here is a synopsis of those “damning” verses’ actual meanings which was sent to me by a reliable friend. The following was quoted by someone who sent it to him.
“Romans 1 Refers to the idolatry common of Cybele. The Romans turn from the invisible God taught by their own philosophers and worshipped Cybele using idols of women, lions and serpents. Her male priests the Galli , castrated themselves, dressed up as women, and played the part of women in pagan temple prostitution. Even the women where fitted with artificial phalli (dildoes) and played the part of men in this religious prostitution. It has NOTHING to do with one guy falling in love with another guy.
Leviticus 18 and 20 Refers to Canaanite religious prostitution. They worshipped Baal and Astarte; that’s why a special word for “male” is used (zakar), and why it is called an “abomination” (toevah) – the term for idolatrous taboos.
1 Corinthians 6:9 The word is arsenokoites, which means a man who abducts boys the make them sex-slaves.”
Remember that the Bible you read IS NOT the original Bible and verses can be greatly distorted. This does not mean that you can’t believe a word that you read in it, but obviously when it comes to the word homosexual, read it with a pinch of salt.
The crux is simply - It is not a sin!
I read this which I thought was great:” For all those idiots that say “God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” – Adam and Eve weren’t gay, but they weren’t mentally challenged either. Does that mean all mentally challenged are doomed to a life of sin?””
The Bible condemns pagan orgies, prostitution, as well as sex without marriage .At that time marriage was considered to be mainly for offspring, so same-sex marriages would obviously be of no use. The Bible does acknowledge and shine favourably on some strong, loving same-sex relationships such as David and Jonathon”
There are other verses in the old-testament, but they too can be explained as these above. I cannot believe that God would condemn someone He created as he/she is. Jesus Christ never said anything against gay’s .Don’t avoid the Bible simply because you’re afraid you might come across those verses, just look at them from a different perspective. The Bible has a lot of wisdom within its pages and a lot of it will actually help you to deal with being gay. As Christians, we should never judge; something that those who discriminate against homosexuals haven’t really grasped. I would, however, also ask that you as a gay person not repay the favour of discrimination to those who judge you. Sometimes it’s all they know and for them to re-evaluate their way of thinking is a challenge in itself. Try and except their opinions. You can’t always change what they might not want to know. Accept it and move on.
There was a recent article recently which I found profound. A Church-group in America arrived at a “gay pride” event in America to apologise for their misconception toward gays. It’s very heart-warming to hear such news. I would imagine that they where welcomed with open arms and gives me great hope for the future of gays and religion.
Homosexuality and depression
Sexuality is not as simple as hetero- or homosexual, there is a grey area. To a psychologist or psychiatrist homosexuality is a frequent encounter. Homosexuals will be more prone to depression and anxiety than heterosexuals due to this added “burden” with which he/she has to cope with and figure out on top of trying to live a productive life. Most prone seem to be adolescents as they haven’t quite fully figured out who they are and being gay could be the cherry on the cake of sending in them into a downward spiral. If there is no support structure for the individual he/she could easily fall into depression. Many try to find coping mechanisms through drugs and alcohol which is tragic and can be avoided by talking about what the issue really is.
Everyone get there ups and down, but depression is a continuing state of feeling sad and/or anxious. Often the person has a low appetite, sleeps a lot, has poor sex-drive etc. which would mean the syndrome has to be treated.
Psychology suggests that there are five facets to making you, you. They are:
*Intellectual
*Physical
*Spiritual
*Sexual
*Emotional
These facets preferably have to be balanced. So each facet “has” to consist of 20% of “you”. If you’re gay the sexual and spiritual facets may be too prominent and the remaining facets are much more suppressed than they should be.
Having dealt with homosexuality and depression for more than decade, I can maybe give you guidelines to getting out of or coping with depression. Some of them would be:
*acceptance of your orientation
*positive thinking
*socialise
*talk to someone knowledgeable
*avoid drugs
*avoid alcohol (to be completely honest, which I’m trying to be, a young person will get into situations where alcohol is present. Moderation is the key word, especially if you’re on anti-depressants. One of two things will happen if your on meds and drinking too much: you’ll either pass out after only your second beer – after you’ve made a total jack-ass of yourself due to the sedative effect of certain anti-depp’s OR you’ll have the worst panic attack you’ve ever had if your on a stimulant type anti-depp.You will also feel horribly, physically ill. Learn your limit somewhere safe and with someone you trust wholeheartedly)
*Learn how to meditate; there is nothing weird or evil about it. Find a quiet spot and only focus on your breathing. Exclude all other thoughts. Just breathe. You will feel your anxiety fade. They is a biological reason why breathing slower and deeper literally calms you down, trust me – it works.
*Physical activity – This is actually pretty cool, because your brain produces chemicals which actually make you “high” and you incorporate the socialising if you do a group activity or meditation (to a degree) if you do an individual one.
*Do something for someone else. It will be amazing and uplifting for you to see the product of something you did for somebody else.
*Find your “triggers”. In other words, find out the what, when and why’s of what gets you depressed and try your utmost to work and resolve the problem. Sort of like you’re doing now by reading this. It is called cognitive-therapy when you find these “triggers” and learn to deal with them, and it’s very effective!
*Smile. Smiling fools your brain into believing that you are happy, even though you might not be.
I feel I have an obligation to write about STD’s (sexually transmitted diseases)
It makes me furious when people assume that if you’re gay you must have an STD. If you speak to anyone in the medical field they will tell you how common it is to see heterosexual patients with HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus), Syphilis, Herpes etc. STD’s are NOT associated only with gays, but humans! But, never-the-less it is worth mentioning since it stays an embarrassing thing to get.
How to be safe(r):
*Try not to sleep around. I know it sounds stupid and common, but sex without love really cheapens sex every time you have it.
*Guys, wear a condom. Or if he refuses and you’re still willing to carry on make sure you don’t get semen (cum or pre-cum) on broken skin, down your throat or in you.
*Never attempt going anal without a condom. That, besides having HIV injected directly into the bloodstream, is the easiest way to become HIV positive.
*HIV can only get transferred from fluids produced during sex to blood and visa versa. Or blood to blood. So once again wear a condom.
*Other STD’s can be easier to get than HIV. Don’t think than you only have to worry about HIV, the other STD’s are very unpleasant. Bacteria, yeasts and fungi are also critters you don’t want.
If you have had sex and been diagnosed or think you have an STD don’t be afraid to go to the doctor and get tested and treated. They’ve seen it all and won’t be shocked or laugh. If you are told that you are positive for HIV it’s not the end of the world either! Many people are on ARV’s (Antiretrovirals) to treat HIV/AIDS (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome), but you just don’t know about it because people have attached a huge stigma to being HIV+. It’s not wrong to have sex, it is also a completely natural part of life and is meant to be enjoyed and to bring you and your partner closer and strengthen your bond. The other STD’s are usually treated with antibiotics.
Being gay doesn’t give you a green-card to promiscuity as stereotypes suggest however. The fact is it’s easy to get sex and since you probably don’t have the idea in your head that you must abstain till the day you get married, why not just have meaningless sex? Well, besides getting a name as being “easy” and health concerns you will find that there are some really nasty guys out there that prey on guys/girls who are uneducated in the world of gay-sex. To give you an example, there are clubs which intentionally infect men with HIV. Guys who are into sleeping around with multiple partners are usually the guys who don’t mind taking drugs, giving STD’s etc. So guys (and girls) PLEASE, be careful! Gay rape is possible as well.
If you’re not sure if you’re gay or not gay:
A friend once told me that he and another friend masturbated together and where playing with each other - kids do such things. If you’re young and you’ve had such an experience it doesn’t mean you’re gay. To clarify, being gay means you’re attracted (sexually) to the same sex. This does not mean you can’t see if a person of the opposite sex is attractive, you just won’t become aroused. If you’re unsure of your orientation give it time. Sexuality isn’t set in stone. Some people only realise much later in life that they might also be attracted to the same sex.
Can homosexuality be “cured”?
The overwhelming majority of people who understand homosexuality and its origins will tell you no. There is however a “confusion” stage some heterosexuals go through, but that occurs during adolescence. If you are older than 20 and you feel you are only attracted to the same sex the chances are very good that you will remain gay. The same goes for bisexuals. People, especially “anti-gay” Churches, have tried their utmost to “turn” some gay people straight, but those individuals where actually just taught to suppress their orientation. It is truly tragic and many where damaged beyond repair. As homosexuality is a natural occurrence it cannot be expected of you to become something you’re not. Gays can live normal lives, adopt kids if they choose and be happy. I have gay friends who are married and have happy marriages, so you also don’t have to live the rest of your life thinking you’ll grow old and wrinkly alone.
How do I “come out”?
This is your choice. You don’t have an obligation to the world regarding announcing your orientation. It is a very freeing feeling though. If you decide you want to come out and your environment allows it, by all means, go for it! Personally it was a great burden I carried with me for a long time. I thought Id be shunned from my house, my Church and have no more friends. The worst you might hear is that:”I believe it’s a sin and you’re going to burn in hell for eternity!” And I’ve actually heard that – from someone claming to be my friend. I gave her books and explanations but she simply wasn’t interested. Such people are simply ignorant so don’t even bother with them. The other 99.9% of my friends embrace it and love me. It’s quite normal now to chat about who I think is hot. We socialize basically anywhere and people JUST DON’T CARE. Obviously we avoid the places where ignorance is everywhere, but those places are in the minority.
Once you’ve uttered those to words you don’t have to do much more. You are gay and that’s absolutely fine!
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Re: Homosexuality and Religion -
April 12th 2013, 12:37 AM
This is a really interesting piece! You wrote this well.
Do you ever get a little bit tired of life
Like you're not really happy but you don't wanna die
Like you're hanging by a thread but you gotta survive
'Cause you gotta survive
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Re: Homosexuality and Religion -
April 12th 2013, 03:41 AM
Oh my favourite topic haha... I am actually writing a similar thing, I mean, vaguely, it's about the reinterpretation of the Bible to show how homosexuality isn't actually a sin I may actually use one of the Biblical passages you used becuase I think that I missed that one lmao (don't worry, I'm not plagarizing, not worth risking my education like that and my topic is taking a different rote... it's just very ironic that we're both writing papers right now about the reinterpretation of Biblical passages to enlighten people to the fact that the supposed sin is mostly an interpretive/translational issue over anything else
It's a great time, i have a lot of fun with it. Did you know that in Leviticus 20:13 where it says "a man shall not lie with a man for it is an abomination and he shall die in his blood" (the last bit might be a little off but what ever you know what I mean), ok so there is abomination and the Hebrew word there was something else yeah, and it went towards being "err" OR "abomination", only err doesn't sound that bad, so they obviously used the harsher word. You'll also notice they only ever come close to condemning the ACT and not the actually homosexual feelings and that there are a lot of reasons that they might have condemned the act (adultry, prostituion etc) and none of it had to do with being in a loving romantic relationship with a man because i really don't think they were familiar with homosexuality back then beyond the idea of the action... I could go on, that's just touching the surface of things I know haha.
I think you did a really good job on this so yay
Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
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