breast feeding in public

[Brandon]

Just because a man is uncomfortable with a woman breastfeeding doesn't mean she should have to stop or is wrong for doing it.

When did I say breastfeeding was wrong? I said it was awkward, that doesn't necessarily mean it's wrong. There are appropriate places to breastfeed and there's not. It all depends on who's around you. If you're breast feeding and people continue to gaze at you, even IF they wanted to see some nipple action, you could probably guess that your breast feeding is too distracting. Would you continue breast feeding even if you weren't purposely trying to get attention? Would you stop breast feeding if you were confronted by another customer?

[her_beautiful_mistake]

Originally Posted by Brandon

Would you continue breast feeding even if you weren't purposely trying to get attention?Would you stop breast feeding if you were confronted by another customer?

1) No. I probably would not even notice because I would be engaged in what I am doing. Not whether or not other people are caring what I am doing. Even if I did, no I would not stop because I would be doing nothing wrong.

2) It depends on what their request or reasoning is, but most likely not. If someone said "that's disgusting, I'm trying to eat, can you stop?" I would reply "I'm sorry you feel that way, but my baby also needs to eat and cannot wait. I am being as discrete a possible, you could always turn your chair".

[L'espoir]

Originally Posted by Brandon

When did I say breastfeeding was wrong? I said it was awkward, that doesn't necessarily mean it's wrong. There are appropriate places to breastfeed and there's not. It all depends on who's around you. If you're breast feeding and people continue to gaze at you, even IF they wanted to see some nipple action, you could probably guess that your breast feeding is too distracting. Would you continue breast feeding even if you weren't purposely trying to get attention? Would you stop breast feeding if you were confronted by another customer?

If it's not wrong then why shouldn't women breastfeed in public? What I'm not really getting from people is why it's so innapropriate, NOBODY will explain that. It's a natural thing, you don't even see the womans breast, what's the problem? Breast feeding is distracting? lol that's the first time I heard that one I, personally, don't know if I would breastfeed if people were looking at me but that's more because I get panic attacks if people watch me and stuff. If I was more confident I would be fine breastfeeding anyway because it's natural and there is nothing inappropriate about it. The point though isn't about whether I would stop if I was confronted, the point is that women should be able to breastfeed if and when they need to in public.

[Gingerbread Latte]

Originally Posted by Brandon

You don't have to look to be in an awkward situation. For instance...my friends and I one time went to Waffle House where a crack whore was standing outside. She smelled like baby powder. She stood next to the entrance and asked for money, and when I continued walking inside, she called me a white boy. SO, my friends and I get our food...and she comes inside and just stares at me for a couple minutes. Doesn't say anything. I'm eating my waffles, enjoying my food, and I have a crack whore staring at me. She wasn't close by, but I'd keep looking and she'd be staring at me. If I didn't look, nothing would change the fact that she's still there looking at me. Looking away from a woman breastfeeding wouldn't do anything. The woman is still there, you acknowledge that she is there breastfeeding...you just continue to look in another direction. That acknowledgment isn't going to change anything, the only difference is that you're not looking at her. If you don't understand, let me put it in another concept:

Suppose you're sitting at a restaurant and you see these two dudes huddled up in a corner. You're pretty sure that they're making out, but you can't tell exactly what they're doing besides kissing. Would you just look away? Probably. Would it be awkward and would you still acknowledge that they are still there, making out and possibly touching each other even if you aren't looking at them? You can't clearly see what they're doing, and they're not doing anything to you, so if you'd be uncomfortable around them, why would you? If you're not used to seeing two dudes make out and touch each other in a restaurant, then it would be awkward and looking away isn't going to solve your problems.

To be fair, I'd feel awkward if it were a man and a woman going at it (I have to deal with couples making out in my eyeshot all the time in my sixth form). Would I like them to stop? Yes it'd be nice if they did but I'm not going to say they can't make out if they want to.

Also two people making out is hardly the same as a baby being fed. The baby needs to eat, do those people need to make out right then and there? Not really, I'm sure they can wait whereas a baby can't.

[Maloo]

I think it's seen as inappropriate because, regardless of the reason, you are still exposing your breast in the general public. I understand that you can't really see much, and that you're feeding your child, I think it's more the principle of it. I dunno.

[L'espoir]

Originally Posted by Myss

I think it's seen as inappropriate because, regardless of the reason, you are still exposing your breast in the general public. I understand that you can't really see much, and that you're feeding your child, I think it's more the principle of it. I dunno.

Did you look at the picture Rachel posted? You can hardly see anything because the babys head is right infront of the breast. I bet there will be women in a restaurant more exposed than the woman breastfeeding but nobody would ask them to cover up!

[Maloo]

Can't find the picture, so no, I didn't see it.
And I know you can't see much, I already said that. I said it was the principle of it, probably. I think people wearing low cut shirts out in restaurants and stuff is inappropriate too, by the way.

[her_beautiful_mistake]

Originally Posted by Myss

I think it's seen as inappropriate because, regardless of the reason, you are still exposing your breast in the general public. I understand that you can't really see much, and that you're feeding your child, I think it's more the principle of it. I dunno.

Please go and look at the pictures I posted. Now if I were feeding my child in my own home or somewhere private, I would probably not bother with a nursing top. But I would and most other women do wear nursing tops like those when breastfeeding in public. You can't see any breast.

[Maloo]

I just said I can't find the picture.

[her_beautiful_mistake]

Originally Posted by Myss

I just said I can't find the picture.

The links are in my post on page 4.

[Maloo]

K never mind I found it. But I still stand by what I said. It's probably the principle of the whole thing.

[BabyIndia]

This thread tbh has got way out of hand..

Fgs.

Breast feeding you either like it or you don't.

It's life get on with it. stop attacking each other.

[C0co]

Originally Posted by Brandon

I can -kind of- agree with you, but not completely. Yes, over the years...boobs have been made into sex objects. But that also includes the whole female body and the male body as well. But yes, boobs do represent more of a sexual object. HOWEVER, there's a difference between breast feeding and breast feeding in public. Breastfeeding...that's completely natural. Like everything else, it has health risks but hey, it's your baby. But breast feeding in public? That's potentially a very awkward situation for someone (most likely a male, since I haven't really seen a female in here complain about breastfeeding) who isn't used to seeing a woman breast feed a child in public.

I suppose that nobody should eat in public then, because someone might feel awkward seeing somebody else eating when they're hungry.

[Kristen♡]

Is an infant really going to distinguish a difference between the bathroom and other areas, though? I honestly don't think they would.
I mean, I understand that it may not be a comfortable place to breastfeed, germ infested, and other things, I'm not saying to do so in the bathroom in this post. What I'm saying that I don't believe a baby would care where they eat. Like you said, if they're hungry, they're hungry.

[Lugez]

As long as you don't have nipples flailing everywhere then it's fine. Use a blanket to cover or something.

[hopefaithlove]

Originally Posted by Kristen.

Is an infant really going to distinguish a difference between the bathroom and other areas, though? I honestly don't think they would.
I mean, I understand that it may not be a comfortable place to breastfeed, germ infested, and other things, I'm not saying to do so in the bathroom in this post. What I'm saying that I don't believe a baby would care where they eat. Like you said, if they're hungry, they're hungry.

It's more about all of the germs. They have very sensitive immune systems. It's also difficult to find a good position to sit in in a bathroom to get the baby to latch on.


I can't wait to have a baby. I'm going to breastfeed my baby when and where I need to.

[Maloo]

Originally Posted by hopefaithlove

It's also difficult to find a good position to sit in in a bathroom to get the baby to latch on.

If you haven't had a child before, how do you know this is definitely true? I'm not saying I think you're lying, I'm just wondering if it could really be a situational/personal thing.

[hopefaithlove]

Originally Posted by Myss

If you haven't had a child before, how do you know this is definitely true? I'm not saying I think you're lying, I'm just wondering if it could really be a situational/personal thing.

I have been babysitting for 6 years. A woman I currently babysit for has an almost 1 year old and 3 year old. I've been around them since they were born multiple times a week. I remember being out with the Mom while she'd breastfeed. She'd tell me all about it. Not only her either. Multiple mothers have, and my cousin. And I do a lot of research for things dealing with children and babies.

[Kristen♡]

Originally Posted by hopefaithlove

It's more about all of the germs. They have very sensitive immune systems. It's also difficult to find a good position to sit in in a bathroom to get the baby to latch on.

I understand that, and I agree. I'm just saying that *if* they were to eat in a bathroom, I don't believe they'd care.

[hopefaithlove]

Originally Posted by Kristen.

I understand that, and I agree. I'm just saying that *if* they were to eat in a bathroom, I don't believe they'd care.

Very true, but as a mother, you'd care.

[Maloo]

Originally Posted by hopefaithlove

I have been babysitting for 6 years. A woman I currently babysit for has an almost 1 year old and 3 year old. I've been around them since they were born multiple times a week. I remember being out with the Mom while she'd breastfeed. She'd tell me all about it. Not only her either. Multiple mothers have, and my cousin. And I do a lot of research for things dealing with children and babies.

Okay, I was just curious.

[Double X]

I definitely don't find it this beautiful, marvelous act. It's necessary though, and doesn't really disgust me. Kind of silly to let a baby go hungry because other people will get offended

cheers

[Gidig]

Really guys? Don't personally attack each other. Second warning, third time and the thread is gone. I understand many of you are trying to be helpful, but simply making a thread to say that it's out of hand makes it even further out of hand. Us Moderators are here for a reason.
And giving a warning is not being touchy, if there were no rules this place would be utter chaos. I doubt people are posting here simply to be personally attacked.

That done with, I feel like if you can breastfeed in a tactful way, as in not pulling out your boob in the middle of a fancy restaurant then you're fine. "Look, this is where Steve proposed to me! Oh and there's that woman breastfeeding in the back." xD My mom used to breastfeed, and I much prefer that to a screaming baby.

[MadPoet]

I do think that people have the right to do it. But I think that they should only do so in public if it is absolutely necessary, and as a last resort. I don't think breastfeeding is disgusting, but it does make people feel a bit awkward when a woman pulls out her breast in public. To be honest if I were at a restaurant and a woman started breastfeeding at the table next to me, I would be a little disgusted. Not because the act of breastfeeding disgusts me, but because it's just not really something I would like to see in the current time and place. So I don't think people mean the act is disgusting, it's just disgusting when it is done in certain places.

I also don't see what's wrong with doing it in the bathroom (if it's a nice one).

[emma01]

After reading some other comments, I have read some pretty good points, but however I do think breastfeeding should be left until it can be done in private.

If, you were (for example) at your other child's school interview, and having a 30minute talk with the principal, and the baby started crying...would you breast feed then? Or how about when you were in a rush, and you were in town. You had to get back to the car by a certain time...would you stop to breastfeed? And what about 3year olds, they can't just be fed when they want.
What I am saying is that people can't just be fed when and where they want, and surely if you needed to get back to the carpark at a certain time, the baby would have to wait! There is also bottles! I was bottle fed every time...and there is nothing wrong with me! Im sure if you were against bottle feeding, you could do it just once to see to your own baby's needs!

[Pour Into Possibility]

Everyone, both males and females have nipples. It's perfectly acceptable to see a mans nipples if he's at the beach, but it's not okay to see a woman's nipples when she's doing the only thing they're designed to do?

It's extremely unhygienic to breastfeed a baby in a public toilet, and I know if someone asked me to feed my prospective baby there, I know I'd be telling them to go eat their dinner in there then see how they feel.

Breastfeeding all the way!

[emma01]

Originally Posted by Pour Into Possibility

Everyone, both males and females have nipples. It's perfectly acceptable to see a mans nipples if he's at the beach, but it's not okay to see a woman's nipples when she's doing the only thing they're designed to do?

There is a bit of a difference between a man's chest area, and a woman's!! Its also quite acceptable to see a young girl's nipples at the beach, a lot of young girls run around naked! (im talking like toddler aged) But just seeing a baby sucking at a grown woman's...is just a bit off-putting to be honest.

[Guile]

I do not find it "disgusting" but it is indecent in our culture for a woman to show her breast in public, and therefore she should not breast feed in public.

[Magic.]

Seeing as most women who breast feed in public don't make a big show of it, and barely show anything as they feed their baby I have no problem with it.
There is a mother at the school I work at however, who breast fed her 3 year old child in the middle of the Easter Church service, like in the middle of a pew. Now there were other mothers breast feeding, but their children were younger and they moved to a free pew at toward the back so as not to disturb others, which nobody had a problem with. They did however mind a three year old being hauled up and wriggling around while feeding.
Basically I think there's no problem with public breast feeding if you respect other people's personal space, and don't go parading it around ...

[her_beautiful_mistake]

Has ANYONE bothered to look at the pictures I've posted!? Gah in future I just won't bother

[ThrashAttack]

Has ANYONE bothered to look at the pictures I've posted!? Gah in future I just won't bother

what......are......pictures? :P

[Maloo]

That's part of the problem in this thread. People are coming and posting without actually reading what others have said, because everyone's just repeating themselves, and the discussion is getting nowhere, if not going backwards.

[ThrashAttack]

People are coming and posting without actually reading what others have said, because everyone's just repeating themselves, and the discussion is getting nowhere, if not going backwards.

I agree and its getting tiering

[Jocelyn.]

Originally Posted by Myss

That's part of the problem in this thread. People are coming and posting without actually reading what others have said, because everyone's just repeating themselves, and the discussion is getting nowhere, if not going backwards.

That's what happens when out of 5 pages only 2 are on topic. People want to keep reiterating their points because they re getting attacked for it, and no one wants to admit to each others good points for the most part.

[ThrashAttack]

I think this Thread has run its course, becouse at the moment its just a mud slinging match.

[lost_chil]

Originally Posted by Xujhan

I also think that women should be able to go topless any place a guy would, and I generally don't find near-nudity - or even just showing a lot of skin - to be a big deal.

If I am not mistaken, the law in Ontario states woman are allowed to go out topless just like men are they not? I lived there for my whole life almsot 1-2 years ago and that was the rule at the time. Not that many took the option, but it was allowed.

As for breastfeeding in public, go for it! If people feel uncomfortable, they can go away. Simple as that. It's natural, and babies need to eat. It's not right to have a mother not be allowed to feed her baby right when she needs to. I stand by my opinion in which woman should be allowed to breastfeed no matter where they are. I would even stand up for a woman trying to breastfeed in a restuarant if she was getting bitched at for it. It's natural, and if you don't like it, don't look. thats all there is to it.

As long as your not being completly public and showing off, theres nothing wrong with it. I myself was a little off when I first saw it, but I've grown use to it. It's natural, and something that has to be done. I got over it, now I just keep walking and smile when a mother is breastfeeding. It doesn't bother me at all. I say they have all right to breastfeed in public.

[topov]

Children see it could get wrong idea or just a perv could be a perv

Perv's could perv, but Im sure they wouldn't object to breast feeding, after all they would be having a good old look. More uncomfortable for the mother than the viewer...
But why would children get the wrong idea? Surely if children were in the area their mother would explain... My 4 year old sister in law knows exactly what breast feeding is... to quote her "When baby Tyler is here, you feed him milk from inside your boobies don't you, and it makes him strong and big like me"

[her_beautiful_mistake]

Originally Posted by ThrashAttack

I think this Thread has run its course, becouse at the moment its just a mud slinging match.

same, but it's amusing to watch

[C0co]

Originally Posted by Pour Into Possibility

Everyone, both males and females have nipples. It's perfectly acceptable to see a mans nipples if he's at the beach, but it's not okay to see a woman's nipples when she's doing the only thing they're designed to do?

It's extremely unhygienic to breastfeed a baby in a public toilet, and I know if someone asked me to feed my prospective baby there, I know I'd be telling them to go eat their dinner in there then see how they feel.

Breastfeeding all the way!

I agree all of the way!!

Originally Posted by emma01

There is a bit of a difference between a man's chest area, and a woman's!! Its also quite acceptable to see a young girl's nipples at the beach, a lot of young girls run around naked! (im talking like toddler aged) But just seeing a baby sucking at a grown woman's...is just a bit off-putting to be honest.

What's the difference between the two because I've seen plenty of men with a chest too.

So it's all right for a mother to neglect their baby by starving them in order to make a few people who feel uncomfortable happy?

[Toast]

Originally Posted by Dement

If it's not wrong then why shouldn't women breastfeed in public? What I'm not really getting from people is why it's so innapropriate, NOBODY will explain that.

There's a difference between wrong and inappropriate. I don't think anybody said there's anything wrong with it. There are, however, inappropriate times and places. I don't have a problem with people breastfeeding randomly in public, but I do it if it's in a restaurant. It can be a little bit gross to many people, so it is rude to do it around people who are trying to eat. Many people seem to need to realize that the world doesn't revolve around them. If they need to do it in a restaurant, they should cover up everything with a blanket. If the staff asks you stop, then you have to listen. Restaurants are privately owned and it's up to them what's appropriate in their restaurant or not. That's why many restaurants can have dress codes.