Say something you wish you could say to their face.

[Kate*]

Regardless of how or why, based on what it looks like and what you JUST told me, I have every right to be triggered over it.

He's over budget because she's allowed to work as many double shifts and days off as she wants and the rest of us get screwed with! Make it fair, I know I work harder than her anyway

I hate when you make plans for me on my days off. I really only get one because the other one is chore day and I spend all my time on dealing with people CONSTANTLY. What part of I want no human contact one day a week to recover, do you not get?!

[Kate*]

I want you to take the schedule back over. You don't get to wonder why I'm paranoid anymore. And my review is late; but I expected as much.

[Kate*]

I know you're fixing it, but I hope I still get to close with you, since we both love it so much. And please don't call me in early tomorrow. Not enough warning, will not be awake.

If I do everything I need to to be eligible, it becomes available, and it's still not an option for me, then something is wrong. Tell me I'm a great employee all day long, but I'm keeping a close eye on you.
Because to do that and then continue to screw me over is still wrong.

[Kate*]

I have a feeling you sacrificed your own hours and cut other people for me, and I hate that. I'm okay with the cuts making the rounds, instead of it only/always being me who gets taken from, but I hate that it takes me yelling at you to get my needs met and that others have to lose. But, again: If I had been offered full-time from the beginning, and/or you didn't hire 7+ people as soon as corporate gave you the payroll budget back, you wouldn't constantly be facing this dilemma.

This can't all be from 7 new hires. I have a feeling either you lied to me, or we're failing and not getting the payroll budget. This is RIDICULOUS and you're the only one allowed to do my schedule for the rest of your life.

[Kate*]

I can't believe, as a friend, you would put me in this position. I know you have a stubborn streak, but when you are junior management level, you can't just do whatever the fuck you want, because you're friends with the manager, and think you can get away with it! So, unless he tells me an exception was made, or there's a caveat I don't know about, I'll have to tell. Not because I think you did anything, but because of the principle, and the fact that you obviously need an ego check.

You left me with no choice. I'm protected, so you'd better not try anything, but I can't stop you from throwing a tantrum and blaming me if you figure it out and so choose. "We're friends" doesn't mean I won't hold you accountable for the big things. Actually, if you think about it, it means the opposite. That I care enough about you to have someone address this stuff before you get yourself fired.

[Kate*]

You wouldn't call the manager who cut my hours in half, a name to a coworker you know wouldn't repeat it, but you'd break the cardinal rule and expect that either, I wouldn't tell on you, or that you'd get away with it because you're friends with the general manager. Interesting moral compass you seem to have.

It's probably completely unrelated, but if you changed your schedule to avoid working with me because you figured out and are pissed that I told on you, you need to grow up. I did the right thing, and the entire situation would've been avoided if you HADN'T BROKEN THE DAMN RULE in the first place. And, even if I hadn't, there are CAMERAS! You have no one to blame but yourself.

[Kate*]

We're having a conversation. You said you have a plan, and I have one too. Between the two of us, we should be able to come up with something. Plus, when you see the schedule, you'll lose your mind.

[Kate*]

Please call me in, but at a reasonable time considering I'm going to bed at 5 AM

[Thereishope]

I wish I could tell you how I feel but it'll only make things worse and I'll feel like a total a-hole. Being around you makes my day and I try not too drop any hints but it's getting harder. I wish you had a different SO. Blah.

[Starseeker]

let me go. it's finished. nothing's gonna change that. move on and just let me go!

[Kate*]

I don't want to insert myself into drama, but I think you have a right to know they're being nice to your face and blaming you behind your back, to avoid accountability for the part they fucked up.

They both showed me their true colors, and I tried to communicate the truth to you. So, no I have NO problem whatsoever, going to him as a witness and telling him about the attitude of his leadership team.

You need to stay in your own fucking store for more than two God damn minutes. No one is going to promote you if we fall apart because you're NEVER HERE What the fuck is wrong with you?! At this point, it feels like you're running away. That we're drowning, and instead of sticking around to deal with it, or admit you need help, or even want out, you're running away, hoping that it'll be better when you come back, and when it isn't, you find an excuse to leave again. One vacation and one training is reasonable, but this is ridiculous.

[Kate*]

I'm 100% serious, I'm just not sure it's possible. Because past patterns prove otherwise, and for reasons outside my control. But, I want to trust you, and something keeps telling me to stay. But, as far as not ready because you haven't seen or trained me on other tasks, I've been BEGGING to learn EVERYTHING for 6 MONTHS. So, that lack is on you.
I'm okay with not ready. I'm not okay with asking that long to become ready, and it never happening. I want those 5 and a half years of experience to count for something. Especially when the requirement is 1/3 of that.

[Kate*]

If your plans don't change, you are incredibly selfish, everyone will be beyond pissed, and you'll be lucky if we don't all quit. Not to mention, this WILL get back to your boss. Plus, stepping up for your own store is what will actually get you what you want. And, part of me still thinks you're running away.

[Kate*]

I wonder if you're going to stick to your crap of "nobody being ready," while you become a giant asshole to your remaining employees, or if this changes things. Because if you think it's bad now, it'll be worse if you alienate the few you have left. Don't dismiss those of us who step the fuck up, and reward it accordingly.

[Kate*]

I want to trust you, and unlike the other times, you're willing to actually work with me. But, I'm afraid I'm going to hit a neurological brick wall that you don't believe in, somewhere on this ladder, permanently stagnate AGAIN because of my fucking brain, and watch someone else get what I want over me. I don't know if I can do that again.

[Kate*]

One more thing you did to me. You took my stubbornness and replaced it with learned helplessness. I used to pursue things I wanted with EVERYTHING I had in me, and never said die. Now, if there's even the slightest chance of failure, I won't even try Because I'll fail either way, and giving up is A LOT less work, and makes the immanent disappointment SO much less painful. Or, maybe it was the disability, but either way, it's gone for good.

[Kate*]

I would love that, and I know you have a passion for it, but you don't have time; so I'm not even going to ask. At least not until we're fully staffed and out of survival mode.

[Kate*]

You didn't even almost have to do that, but you did, and I can't thank you enough. But, I know it's not your job, so I'll try not to lose it that badly again. But, if we're really going to do this, it's going to happen A LOT and I'm not sure you'll be willing to deal with it for that long.

[Kate*]

Assuming you had time, which you don't, I would NEED you to understand that my disability is real, and the ways it affects me are valid before anything else. I keep "focusing on" my diagnoses because you don't seem to believe in them, and if you're going to work with me on ANYTHING you'd have to GET that first.

I figured out what happened. You know I would never leave it like that unless I had a reason. And you gave me 3. Your schedule, Your labor policy, and Your chain of command. So, I was right, I busted my ass for my entire shift, and left on time like you require. I'm not responsible for anyone else. But, next time you want to throw tantrums, look at the system you put in place (and the fact that you know I follow shit TO THE LETTER) before you cast blame on me. And regardless, SHE had NO right to tell me about it, period. And the fact that we agree on that, is just more proof that I'm a really good judge of character with a lack of tact. And, I'm not sorry for that either.

[Kate*]

Just because I know why you're like this, doesn't mean it's acceptable. Your expectations are unrealistic, and I'll give up or quit LONG before you get what you want.

[Kate*]

I hope I'm wrong about what I think I overheard. You know you deserve better, right?!

[Hiraeth.]

Do not think it was at all appropriate what you said yesterday.

[Kate*]

You need to stop contradicting yourself. It's infuriating. "I can't promote someone who can't hit standards." and explaining that if I couldn't meet said standards, you would let me down easy.

Months later: "I'm afraid I'll be able to do everything, but not well enough (read to standard)

Lists people in leadership (most of whom were hired in, not promoted) and the fact that they aren't perfect at these things, "That's not all that leadership is." Would you make up your mind?!

[Kate*]

I hope he was just wrong; because otherwise you BLATENTLY lied to me.

[Kate*]

I need full-time, or I have to leave; and not because I want to. If I'm not getting them now, I'm sure as hell never getting them, and I can't do this anymore.

[Kate*]

I may struggle with criticism, but at least I'm not immature, petty, and passive-aggressive to the point of demoting myself or getting myself fired for being stupid. I assume by now you realize what she's doing, and that you're going to do something about it. Because if not, your boss is always an option. This is someone who didn't have to work their ass off to earn their leadership role, and yet this is what they're doing with it. But, I'm somehow less qualified. Make it make sense!

[Hiraeth.]

All y'all had to say "hey, I love swearing; but I respect it ain't everyone's cup of tea" instead of being typical Gen X jerks.

[Hiraeth.]

I can't wait to see the two of you on Sunday, but I'm beginning to feel a bit of anxiety.

[Kate*]

As sick as it makes me to think about, I think this was the last straw. It's a shame you're probably going to lose who you admit is one of your best employees over bureaucracy and policy, but here we are. The fact that you had the opportunity to prevent the whole thing twice, and didn't is what's really pissing me off. So far, I've been right about everything I suspected would happen. But, you got me to trust you, and now there's nothing you can say. I will never be okay there again, and you're partly to blame.

You knew how valuable I was, and with one decision you blew it. There isn't one single cell in my body that wants to do this, but it's the reality of the situation you put me in.

"If you really want something, you'll find a way; if you don't, you'll find an excuse." You can tell me how much you love me all day long, but you had the opportunity, and you made excuses. And you had the time, and it didn't happen. And now you don't, and it's everyone else's fault. So, why should I bend over backwards to stay?! "You never know what's going to happen." But, I do because we've been at this a year now. I don't want to leave any more than you SAY you want me to. But, the time comes for action, and it's all excuses. You told me to trust you, you had a plan. And I could afford to, so I did. Now I can't, so you're out of time.

[Hiraeth.]

I really hate your "all business" attitude. Be a little human, damn it; have some empathy.

[Kate*]

The situation is hard enough, but this makes it so much worse. I guess "The road to Hell is paved with good intentions." is true. In an effort to avoid crushing me, because you love people so much, you don't want to hurt them, you said what I wanted to hear, got me to trust you, and then your behavior contradicted your words when policy meant you couldn't deliver.

I want to overlap with you as much as possible. If I'm working one close, it better be your close. And I would love to be ready (and your best option) by the time you have to fire her for calling off too much, but it doesn't sound like that'll happen.

[Kate*]

I want to believe what you say, and that you want to keep me, but I feel like you really don't. That the promotion I want, and even full-time will never come. That you already know that, and just don't want to tell me. You got me to trust you and said you'd always be honest and never sugar-coat anything, but now I don't know what the truth is.

[Kate*]

You can have great qualities and still screw people over. You knew exactly what you were doing, and I would've had more respect for you if you just admitted it.


I'm 99.99% sure it's never happening now, (because even if that job opened, you'd just give it to her) but if the new one works out, and you did want me back full-time, I wouldn't even consider it unless you matched the pay. You made this bed, you lie in it; and don't expect me to do you any favors. You've burned that bridge about 4 times.

[Soda_Voxel]

Stop romanticising it Stop making light of it Stop encouraging others to do it Stop treating it like it's fun or silly or trendy This is not okay You are not okay

[Hiraeth.]

You should've been there.

[Soda_Voxel]

Please understand my limits and struggles and be gentle about them yes I know they're unconventional and irrational but please

[Kate*]

I want to trust your words, but your actions speak louder. "We're both doing what we have to do for right now." "I'm proud of you, I would've done the same thing." This was the best decision under the circumstances, but you're being a hypocrite, and he's fighting for me. And, I'm not convinced yet that I'll settle in there. I have the best of both worlds for right now, which gives me the freedom to fail, and the time you're claiming I'll need.

[Hiraeth.]

I don't think it's right that you're witholding the next step just because I have to answer these questions.

[Hiraeth.]

I really hate that we have to get through the holidays first.

[Kate*]

What part of "Night owl turned vampire, who got off at 11:30 last night" are you not understanding?! You insist on making me work mornings, despite knowing that he has me work nights. I'm exhausted in every sense of the word, running on no sleep, and things won't slow down until at least New Years. I knew I was taking on too much, and wanted to wait until January to start because of it. But, here we are instead, and it's killing me.