Say something you wish you could say to their face.

[Kate*]

So, you are capable of working with and around a disability; unless it’s mine. And, they get to call you by your first name while I was called unprofessional. And for the record, I don't remember ever calling you that to your face, but trust me, your last name without the Dr. wasn't the most offensive thing I could've come up with. That's not even meant to be offensive, it's verbal shorthand for me which again, I don't use to their face. Once again I’m the exception to everything. I swear to God, I’m over this.

I was treated completely differently and you all know it. My guess is that my reputation really is shot and that they lied to me. I would completely believe that.

It scares me that you're this naive and gullible. Not only do you believe whatever anyone tells you, but had you done your research like you claimed you do so well, you wouldn't have ended up in this mess to begin with.

[Kate*]

I think we can all agree that it went from dream to nightmare very quickly. That doesn't mean that

1. My desire for it diminished
2. Losing it didn't cause damage
3. Leaving one nightmare didn't land me right in the middle of a waking one that never seems to end.

I think I will always want it. I don't think I'll ever get out of this, and as much as I want a "better" happy ending, I'm more than aware that one is not garenteed. I want to go back and finish the now unfinishable. I want what I've always wanted.

Obviously you do because you bothered to comment on it. Or do you have nothing better to do than insult people over their opinion on an issue that you don't even understand. Good for you, you've made yourself look like an immature idiot.

I want to tell you, but I won't. I broke and you don't have to care.

[Everglow.]

I don't even know where to start. I love you and I'm sorry I was too unwell to come and see you last week. I know you wouldn't blame me for it but I feel so sad that I couldn't, and now this is going to happen. You're one of the best people I've ever met and I'm so so proud I know you. I'm scared for everyone else and I'm scared I'll cry in front of people and I'm scared you'll be on your own. You're perfection and I love you more than words can say, I just hope you know that. I hope you know I love you.

[Calaer]

I do miss you, and I've forgiven you, but I'm not so sure I'm ready to invite you back in to my life. You crossed a line that, I'm afraid, you'll never be able to come back from.

[SirJordan]

I kissed your gf whilst you went on holiday :/

[Calaer]

I wish you could be more trust worthy. I really wish I could invite you back in to my life.

[Everglow.]

I love you. It's killing me to know I can't see you again. You're such an amazing person and I miss you more than words can say. I wish this was a bad dream. It still feels like one. I thought we'd have so many more years with you. I thought you'd get to see me make something of myself, and that you'd see my brother and sister grow and become amazing people just like you were. I'm so sorry you had to hurt so much. I'm so sorry yuo're gone.

[Kate*]

I'll probably end up telling you something anyway, even if you can't do anything. Maintaining contact just in case, that's all it is. I know you claimed you did it to protect me, but sending me crashing into this new hell of a reality was no better. Don't know what I expect you to say. The only reason I'm even expecting a response at all is because I've always gotten one.


Every time I ended up in your office you told me I wasn't wasting your time, but it ended up wasted so I did. And you said that even if it ended that it wouldn't be wasted, but I can't prove that I learned it or use it, so it was. Not only do I not get to have the life I want, but I don't get to have one at all. I should've given up before I even started. I fight like hell for my whole life to end up with nothing and it's not worth it anymore. I want you to make this better, but you can't and we both know it. I finally learned when to quit. There's just no point and I've had enough.

I don't think I'll ever know how much of it was really my fault, and that tortures me. And I have to watch everyone else start their lives by getting their dream jobs doing what I was so close to and wanted to do so badly. Can you at least make it stop hurting so much?

I have to be really careful with what I tell you. Even if you could do something, I don't want to put it on you. That's not what I want to use you for, but I feel like it'll eventually come out that suicide is virtually guaranteed at this point. Not everyone gets a happy ending. And it has nothing to do with how hard I fought either because we both know how much work I did that didn't count for anything.

[Everglow.]

How dare you say your own mother is just a chapter in your life. She died. That doesn't offer the chance of a new beginning it means you can never see the woman who gave you life again. You'll never see the woman who gave you chance after chance even though you treated her like shit. How dare you say that mother and child bonds are important and that's why your 'little unit' will be ok. How dare you. You deserve nothing from us. You have been treated better than you deserve already so don't you dare complain when you bought this on yourself. I've never been so disgusted by supposed family before you. Absolutely ridiculous. I hope people turn their back on you just as you did and you have nowhere to turn or run this time because the woman who showed you so much love has gone now and you definitely don't stand a chance with us.

[Calaer]

I've never wanted to forgive you before. I've always wanted to hold it against you, and tell people I don't really like you, but I know this isn't what he wants for my life. I'd rather follow his example any day, than to follow my own.

[Everglow.]

I'm worried about going to your flat tomorrow because I know you won't be there. I'll see your bed and probably your walking stick and your cats and pictures but you'll never be there again. I'm still struggling with reality even though I know you'd probably think it's ridiculous and tell me to stop being so silly. I wish you could tell me that.

[emc2100]

I hate life, Its really depressing i have nobody to rely on i have nobody to talk to, i'm here all by myself and it Hurts me so much. i hate everything, i wish i was NORMAL

Right now, I don't see a future with you.

[Calaer]

I wish you were more supportive and caring.

[Kate*]

Stop acting like you know everything. They aren't even the same thing.

Yes, I know a diagnosis 20 years ago would've meant a better life now, but you know what? Life didn't give me that option.

I think I'll always wonder that, but it's a question I can never ask.

I extended an olive branch, she broke me with it. Thanks for keeping me away from her, I know you didn't have to do that. I suspected that her (obvous to other people) dislike of me was spilling into areas where it shouldn't have (like my grades) Although, she supposedly liked me and had nothing bad to say about me, but broke me with my own attempt to fix things. Maybe it doesn't matter anymore. Maybe she was trying to help. I'm sick of trying to figure it all out. All I know is that she had no right to tell me what I do and don't feel, she spoke for you when she shouldn't have (and was wrong about what you said), and couldn't keep her story straight or lied to you. And my life fell apart because of it. I feel like I'm never getting out of this.

I don't know what I want from you. Even if you could give me what I think I probably want, you probably won't, you don't have to, and you no longer owe me anything. The only reason I'm expecting a response at all is because you've always given me one; and I'm always grateful for it.

[Moxie.]

It's been years since I thought about you. I haven't let myself, to be honest. Thinking about you now hurts. I hope you're okay and that you're safe. I hope you've managed to make peace with yourself and that you're on the way to being happy. I'm sorry for the way it all went down and I hope you've somehow managed to forgive me. From the bottom of my heart, I just hope you're still here and that you're good.

[Calaer]

I want to invite you back in, and have you come back, but I know that isn't going to work out, and that just makes me so sad.

[Kate*]

Not referring to someone here. No, your can't expect the world to cater to your sensitivities. You are the one responsible for managing your triggers. Life is not inpatient. The idea that everyone else has to adjust for you doesn't fly, mostly because it's not practical. This sense of entitlement you have won't get you very far in life. I know you probably don't realize that though.

You keep reassuring me that I can do anything I want with a degree in anything because "You can make it your own" and a lot of people don't end up using the one they earn. There are three problems with this: You don't have one, so you don't know how this works, and the fact that you keep going to for-profit schools even after getting screwed proves that. This doesn't always apply when someone has a disability, and the examples you give me of people who don't use their degrees are so rich that they don't NEED to use their degrees for anything. Almost no one ends up making that much.

You keep leaving later and later. In the almost 2 years you've been doing this for her, the time you leave has shifted 3 hours. I know we need the money, but I warned you when you started of what you already knew.

[Calaer]

I'm so glad you went to church yesterday.

[Nightblood.]

Please for the love of god start acting like the adult you are

[Everglow.]

Does he really have to stay over four times in the two weeks since everything went to shit for me? I'm fuming. You don't give a shit about anybody but him.

[Jess_5sos]

I think it's uneccesary for you to spend your time picking on me and treating me like shit. You tell me you hate me, tell me something I don't know. Even I hate me.

[Calaer]

I hope you get some sort of inspiration from me. Don't mistake this as a kindness. I'm not doing this for you.

[Everglow.]

- I wish I could bring you back. It feels like it happenes so long ago. I miss you so much. I'm aiming high to make you proud of me, so you have a granddaughter who wont disappoint you like I know she did.

- You'll ave to forgive me if I actually don't want to have a conversation with you after all. I don't even want to make eye contact with you anymore.

[Kate*]

I want to help you. I believe my purpose is to help people, somehow if not that way, but there's only so much I can do.

I hope it's not as awkward as I think and I'm just seriously overthinking it.

Please don't interrogate me, I'll be tired and I don't feel like talking about the fact that I have no life.

[beautiful_mystery]

I'm not happy. I haven't been happy in a long time. You say that I never do anything for you... But I do. I've hidden all my pain and problems. To make you happy.

[Storyteller.]

I'm getting a weird vibe from you all of a sudden and I genuinely can't tell if it's just me reading too much into it.

[Kate*]

I'm tempted to tell you for a complete lack of other options, but even if I could bring myself to do that, and you could do something, you wouldn't. You responded when you didn't have to, but I think your legitimate care for me may have gone out the window on dismissal day.

I know you wanted me so badly and that you fought for me, but I'm too limited to fight for myself and I've had enough. I wish you were enough for me to hold on for. I was hoping that there were options I just didn't see, but there aren't, so there's no point anymore. For the record, I tried to tell you 3 times.

I finally know what it means to have a problem for every solution. You are making your life (and ours) SO much harder than it needs to be. I have it too and I learned to keep my mouth shut. Either treat it, do what you need to do (EAT what we bring you it's NOT that F***ING HARD) or STOP WHINING.

[beautiful_mystery]

What you did. .. it still hurts

I love you as a friend and I have a huge crush on you, and it sucks because we can't even keep in contact after I leave where I am. I love talking to you and you put me in a better mood. I am so glad you feel comfortable around me to share your shit with even though I am a client.

[Everglow.]

I'm sorry I gave in..

[chewystuff2023]

I would do anything to have you in my arms i would do anything to "make you feel my love" ( it's title of an Adele song) I will always be there for u, but i dont think u would do the same for me, would you.

My heart shattered when you whispered "I love you" because I knew I was going to shatter yours. I cared about you so much, but I was never in love with you. That's why I wouldn't finish the dance or kiss you that night. I was never in love with you and I couldn't do anything to lead you on.

And now it's two years later and you're reaching out to me again. I want to love you so badly, but I know I never will. I know that you will fall in love again too fast. That's why I'm not responding. I'm protecting the both of us.

[Bongo Jack]

We have been close friends for the whole of Secondary School, Secondary school ended I went Sixth Form you went College. I honestly think we are going to loose contact which is really upsetting.

[eeba]

I'm so sorry for everything.

I feel so silly for ever even hoping for one second that you'd have feelings for me too because you're way way way too good for me.

But then, I don't even deserve you as a friend, and you've always been the sweetest friend in the world to me, and I don't know why I couldn't have just been grateful for that and acted like an adult when you let me down in the sweetest, gentlest, most understanding way possible and still wanted to be friends with me after that.

God, I'm so sorry, you deserve so much better. I hope you aren't thinking about me because I want you to be happy and I make you unhappy because I'm an awful person.

But I also want you to know that I am thinking about you, and hoping that you're doing well.

I hope I will see you again some time.

I forgive you. The bruises you left took no time to heal and I made myself forget they happened. But today I remembered, and in case you remember too, I forgive you.

[Calaer]

You've got to grow up and start taking responsibility for your actions and your children.

[Kate*]

I don't agree with it, but when you fought for the freedom we have, you gave them the right to do it. They aren't disrespecting your sacrifice, they're exercising the freedom it afforded them. Stop getting self-righteous and demanding respect. It's not what you did that they have a problem with anyway.

You realize the irony of confronting him on Facebook about the fact that Facebook is the wrong way to handle the situation(with details from your side of it), right? Instead, handle it the way that you think he should have and teach him how to do it. If you didn't want me to know about this, again keeping it off of Facebook, or at least to your messages would've been the answer there.

I know most of that was you venting about her, but I think there was some about me. Keep in mind that when you complain about her, she's not in the house and can't overhear you. When you do it about me, I CAN! So, if you need to vent about me, at least save it for when you know I'm out of earshot.

It's one thing not to believe that, it's another for it not to be true. False beliefs aren't healthy either.

I wasn't going to give up on you, you didn't have to push me away. I wasn't a perfect friend but I never would have given up on you.

Would it have made any difference if I called you?

I miss you. I have a picture of us hanging by my bedroom door. We were so young. We both seemed so happy. I had no idea what you were going through.

I'll never forgive myself for not calling you.

No matter what anyone tells me, I know I could have stopped you.

You could still be alive right now if I had only done something.

And I'm so sorry I didn't.