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Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
August 28th 2012, 11:09 PM
I think I'm going to pretend I'm happy again. Just like I did for so many years. Then when I finally told a few people, all except one didn't understand why I'd never told anyone before that I was depressed. In truth, I didn't know it at the time, but now I do, and things were so much better before they wanted to "help" me. I never should have said anything.
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
August 29th 2012, 02:45 AM
i don't wanna be strong anymore.
From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!
Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
August 31st 2012, 02:28 AM
i'm back to lying all the time
From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
August 31st 2012, 04:21 AM
I suppose I feel guilty for things I shouldn't feel guilty for. Plus, I hate change, I enjoy the same old silly routines. Oh, and some days I dream of horrific deaths.
Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!
When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 1st 2012, 12:43 AM
I'm scared of myself.
I'm tired of pretending I'm fine. I wish they didn't believe my obvious lie.
I'm about ready to give up. I don't know how much more I can take before I do something I will probably regret.
I might be suicidal if I wasn't so afraid of dying.
"Just open your eyes and see that life is beautiful..." ~Sixx:A.M.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 1st 2012, 01:59 AM
I can't let anyone know when I self-harm because if I do then my step-mom will drink and if my step-mom drinks then my dad will kick her out and I will be all alone again. I need her, she needs me. If he kicks her out I know that I will attempt again and if it doesn't work I will end up back in the hospital.
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."
"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 1st 2012, 10:42 PM
Eh. I consider myself firmly in recovery. Yet over 50% of the music on my ipod is borderline pro ana :/ The music is familiar and comforting. It reminds me of a bad period in my life, but a period where I felt so irrationally safe and secure.
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!
Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!
Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 4th 2012, 08:52 PM
its like im afraid
afraid to find what lies inside
i dont want anyone to see the real me
the broken damaged my just the perfect me i create on the outside
to scared to let go of the past
and whats happened to me
if someone sees
if they know
will i be an out cast??
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 5th 2012, 05:34 AM
I've been listening to songs, watching videos/movies, and reading books that I know will trigger me, but honestly I don't really care. I kind of want it to trigger me because if it makes me self-harm then I will get relief, quick.
"Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll land among the stars."
"For those who don't care, for those who can't see, never give up, always thrive to be free."
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!
Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 5th 2012, 06:38 PM
I can't believe I'm seriously considering sleeping with him. He's made it clear that's only what he's after, do I have ANY respect for myself left at all?
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 26th 2012, 09:38 AM
1. I'm an asshole and everybody knows it.
2. I can't do anything right and continue to prove it to everybody I know.
3. I'm very close to giving up because I know that everybody would be better off.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 26th 2012, 11:03 AM
I gave a guy a blow job when I was 9! I feel like a total whore but he threatened me and I didn't want to and then he undressed me and licked me out and -shudders- then forced me to suck his, his cock. I feel totally gross and nobody knows. So when the rumours that I gave a guy head spun back to me it made me feel on edge I don't want to live with this secret anymore
Jay.
Buddy since 18/11/12 LiveHelp Operator since 22/12/12 Add me on Facebook Jay Louise Shorrock!
A whisper in the dark; is better than silence in the light. -Courtesy of your's truly.
My blog is open to all, those whom are easily triggered avoid, it's a story about a girl and her life and how far she has come over the years. If you read it, I hope it inspires you to keep fighting and to NEVER give up!
When you can no longer think of a reason to continue, you must think of a reason to start over.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets. -
September 27th 2012, 02:34 AM
i have a plan. i don't feel safe
From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
Do you wanna come with me? 'Cause if you do, then I should warn you - you're gonna see all sorts of things. Ghosts from the past. Aliens from the future. The day the Earth died in a ball of flame. It won't be quiet, it won't be safe, and it won't be calm. But I'll tell you what it will be: The trip of a lifetime!
Don't trust a perfect person and don't trust a song that's flawless.