Triggering: Complaint of the Day 2

[Tigereyes]

"Sometimes goodbye's the only way..."

[Rivière]

My back hurts. I feel so hurt inside. Everything is wrong.

Miss the way things used to be.

I guess I'm moving on from the fandom rabbit hole and to melancholy.

Lovely.

[mentalhelp.21]

my roof is leaking

Woke up anxious. Just not feeling today and only have a few things I can work on. I know some things I can do to pass the time but I am probably not going to get a ton done today.

[Tigereyes]

However much I do, it's never enough

Right now I hate myself and I don't know if I want to stay safe. This is a shitty day

[Tigereyes]

My new motto for this semester: If you're not working, you're procrastinating.

I have a headache.

Forgot how bright the sun was.

This last hour is going by so damn slow. Just got to remind myself I have an hour left. One hour and then tomorrow is an easy day

Still have a headache.

Wish it would stop being rainy all the time.

[Tigereyes]

College really makes me want to die... And no one cares.

Fucking sick of this.

[Tigereyes]

Dreamed about doing piles of schoolwork. Wish the dream was real 'cause then I'd have a chance of getting it all done.

Patience is beginning to waver.

[Storyteller.]

I love when miscommunication and misunderstandings lead to me almost crying at work.

[Tigereyes]

All this caffeine, but it's not helping enough. In fact, it's making me sick more than it's helping, but it still helps some, so I need it anyway.

I shouldn't have to put up with such a deplorable human being, even if they are family.

[Tigereyes]

Why couldn't I have just dropped out freshmen year... would've saved a lot of money.

They didn't get me in the week of priority registration so I'll have to take more time off. Makes me nervous.

[Tigereyes]

Pushed myself so hard that I'm too sick to make it to classes, even though they all have mandatory attendence.

Stupid thing is not working.

[Tigereyes]

My prof is definitely on uppers.. probably cocaine..

[Kintsukuroi.]

So much to do but I can't find the energy.

[Tigereyes]

*Pushes self so hard in school that I make myself really sick*
Profs: Good for you for pushing yourself and being on top of things! Keep it up!
Me: ... *Makes self sicker by continuing to push through being really sick from pushing myself too hard*

Please stop..

Having one of those days where I wish I could curl up into bed and sleep it away. Unfortunately I have to be at work until 5pm

[Tigereyes]

I've pushed myself so hard that now it's a huge struggle just to get ready in the morning. Never mind the piles of homework with rapidly approaching deadlines or classes with mandatory attendence.

Have no real desire to go to work today. If I could I would skip but it's Friday so it will be okay.

[Tigereyes]

Will it ever get better? Or should I just end it earlier than planned? Because even then seems too far away...

I have such a strong urge to cut myself. I have such a strong urge to destroy myself. Not sure I'll make it through the goddam day!!!!!

[Philomath]

There is too much to do and I have no idea how to do it all. I just want to cut right now and have for the past couple of weeks at least. Each day the urge lingers and seems stronger.

[Tigereyes]

Ah yes.. I'm sooo happy right now. Probably look it because I feel relief at seeing the end..

[Tigereyes]

I almost didn't come back last night.. But it's fine right?

[Tigereyes]

The excessive caffeine isn't working anymore, but I need it to work for another 2 weeks..

[Storyteller.]

I got called in early today and even though I'm only working an extra hour, I'm really not sure I have the energy for it.

[Tigereyes]

Caffeine isn't helping enough to let me push through the chronic fatigue and burnout. You know what would help? Uppers. You know who has a connect? My professor.

[Tigereyes]

Seriously considering ending it in a few days. I can't even function. But I have to keep up with an impossible semester. And i just can't. There's no time or energy for anythign that's not school because there's not enough for school. I can't live with myself if I fail all these classes. I'd rather die.

I wonder if I will ever get past all this. What will it take? I already gave them my closure, but they had theirs a really long time ago.

Anxiety and nerves so bad, I don't know why!

Today was more stressful than I anticipated. I get to do it all again tomorrow. At least I get off early tomorrow. That's a much needed break and I won't get another one till November.