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Re: Screaming thread.
Only thing I'm good at is failing. I can't take this anymore.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate how I'm always the one with the physical bruises. Dx
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Re: Screaming thread.
I do... fail everyone, I do...
*sighs* Last night was... not good, I'm convinced I don't need to be around anymore. It makes sense if you think about it, No one needs you... so go away. Should I just go away from this world? |
Re: Screaming thread.
No matter how hard I try, I will never be good enough. Once a failure, always a failure.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate how I can't find a phone case to fit my phone. It makes me so angry.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'm just a useless piece of shit. I hate myself. I don't want to be me, anymore. I don't want to fucking live. >.<
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Re: Screaming thread.
If I can't be one, you don't have a chance in hell.
This has been the WORST day I've had in a long time. They will NEVER know what this or they have done to me and I may never recover from it. Yet I'm the unprofessional one. You're in for some serious karma and I hope you get it soon. I'm torn between whether I want to meet with you again, but it would probably never happen either way so I guess it doesn't matter. It's after 6AM and I haven't fallen asleep yet. The flashbacks and good memories aren't helping. I'm looking into these things now, but I know you're just going to make things sound good when they may not be so you can get even more money out of me. Not only do I not want to be taken advantage of, but I can't afford to go through this again, I really can't. It seems like you want me desperately and it does seem like the better short-term option, but I know that it's not really worth anything and it's a lot of work for a degree I can't use. I can't afford to earn a degree I can't use, I'm paying off one more than I'm earning. I GIVE UP! I gave myself a year,but it's worse than I thought and I have broken. Overall my life has been nothing but an endless string of disappointment and failure that isn't my fault. I should be used to it by now. |
Re: Screaming thread.
Words cannot express how angry I get at my family for being so crappy. My parents act like 2 year olds who didn't get a nap in.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Life for me has became this empty hollow, a pit's unending and a dark mist so strong that it blinds everything for me.
I hate how pathetic i am... |
Re: Screaming thread.
I hate being so shy!
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Re: Screaming thread.
Not strong anymore... Just a weak fucking loser.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I was clearly born into the wrong family
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'm sorry, but you ruin everything. You bully me, guilt trip me and you and your stupid little "friends" that you BITCH about to me, are all on YOUR side, are they? You are supposed to be my friend.
Bad times happen, girl: but when have you ever asked about ME. What am I supposed to do, hang around your miserable face until you decide you've had enough of FUCKING making my life a misery? I don't think so. So I walk off, You say "I hate you" and I try to walk away from the way you DRAG MY LIFE down. Then of course, it's all a fucking "joke." Well, I'm sorry, but you're a bitch. You pretend to be my friend and just because you've never got your life together, just because you hate the way you look, doesn't mean you have to insult me. Sometimes I want to smack you in your fat, smug face. You have no right to make a good day a bad one. You have no right to send me nasty little texts because YOU drive me away to hang out with the boys. You are horrible, you ruin every little day. YOU ARE MY FUCKING RAIN CLOUD. I HATE YOU. Why do you exist? You are my personal doorway to depression: and I have to resist you every second of every damn day. Call yourself a FRIEND? You're a MONSTER. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I'm a horrible person.
I should die. |
Re: Screaming thread.
No one cares about me. No one has and no ever will.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'm done with giving to everyone else because no one gives to me. I always drop what I'm doing to help people or reply to a text. But no one ever does it for me. I'M DONE. From now on I live for ME and only ME. Fuck everyone else.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Every second I feel more sick to live in this vile body, I hate myself. I should die.
I have no meaning now, I'm just a fucking horrible person who deserves to die. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I am alone. And I smell a skunk, which isn't good for the mood I am in :mad:
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate storms more than anything and I wish that the storms that are going on now, and that are supposed to go on for the rest of the week would simply fuck off. :glare:
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Re: Screaming thread.
Once a burden, always a burden.I don't deserve to be alive.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I would love to scream at this website in general. I feel like mental toughness isn't an option on this website. Everyone wants the easy way out, and no one is willing to put in any work to solve their problems.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Wish I wasn't so hideous
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Re: Screaming thread.
I really just wish things go the way i want to...
But that's just it isn't it? Life just keeps fucking up. No matter how hard you try, things just... be gone. All gone... What's the point in even trying anymore...? |
Re: Screaming thread.
I have ideas, but I'd need 2 degrees in place of the one I almost had and I'm already paying for one more than I'm earning. "This won't ruin your life" they said... "It might be the best thing that ever happens to you." they said... Yeah, you're still WRONG!
I would LOVE for these pounding headaches that I have for no reason to GO AWAY multiple doses of medication (taken appropriately) aren't even working. Somehow I'm starting to get moments where I feel better about this, but it doesn't mean the alternatives are worth it or that the loss won't hurt for a long time. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I hate being trapped in this house. Its old and disgusting and small and being trapped here leaves me with nothing to do but think and fester with my emotions until the urges come back and i want to kill myself again. All i can do is sit here and think about me and my scars and my ass of a brother and sojeet....and just sit there with no hope and still pray for emily who has no faith and still pray that everything will get better...it will get better right?
my god please just end this and take me home... |
Re: Screaming thread.
I hate the way i am, I just rather die than be like this...
Why the fuck am I even posting this shit on this fucking thread anyway? |
Re: Screaming thread.
I don't deserve to live. I should cut myself.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'm such a fucking fat ass failure.....
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Re: Screaming thread.
Get.
the fuck. out. of. my. LIFE. |
Re: Screaming thread.
I wish you would just grow up already~ I'm so tired of listening to you complain about everything that goes wrong. Why not think about what goes right for once.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate you so much. My skin crawls at the thought of your existence. You treated me, like you treat everyone - like sh!t. You use people for your own personal gain. You do what you want without any consideration towards others. You never treated me like your girlfriend. You used me for sex and like a robot to give you compliments all the time. I hate you I HATE YOU. Being in the same town as you makes me want to be sick. I F**KING HATE YOU.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Fuck you stupid mother fucking weather ruining everything. Goddamn it now I gotta figure something else to fundraise my eagle scout project because no dipshit in their right mind would come to a car wash after a hard storm. Fuck you weather, fuck you.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I don't want to guilt trip you, you had no choice, but I'm desperate for guidance from you which I'll probably never get and I need you to know how painful this is.
I think it's official now. I never got what I needed while it would help, I did the best I could to survive and succeed, I white-knuckled for 14 years trying to believe things would get better as they got worse, and everything ended in the ultimate failure and loss of my childhood dream. My life is in shambles, my self-esteem is non-existent, I've been mentally and emotionally abused by people who destroyed my slef-worth because they didn't even try to understand (after they claimed they cared and were trying to "help"), I have no hope left, and I don't see a point in holding on anymore. I just can't. And for God's sake, STOP SAYING THAT! I'm living proof that it isn't always true. |
Re: Screaming thread.
Need to lose weight. Need to get skinny. So fucking fat.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate you so much. You trash. You dont deserve to live. You dont deserve to have any of this. You deserve to cut yourself. Stop kidding yourself and just do it.
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Re: Screaming thread.
Sad to say it, but I had to block my sister off facebook, and just generally ignore her for a bit. It breaks my heart because she's my best friend, but she sorta deserves this.
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Re: Screaming thread.
We're running out of (good) food, I'm hungry, I've gained weight, and I'm in a full-force suicide spiral with no support and no hope left. I'm SO tempted to start doing things I shouldn't do and I can't hold on anymore.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I hate how I end up feeling so bad during the day that I take a nap and without anyone to wake me up I sleep hours and then can't go to bed during bed time.
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Re: Screaming thread.
I'll never be good enough.....
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Re: Screaming thread.
They come in, trash the place, drink all of Ava's juice and her soy milk, and then expect me to be okay with it?! I cannot stand this!
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