Non-PG13 (Strong Language): Screaming thread.

[Dawn.]

I just wish things weren't so busy right now.

[Celyn]

Headache. Argh.

[Tigereyes]

Nearly all of entire family and extended family is about to reject me for being "gay" because I'm aro ace and want to be roommates again with my partner/best friend. So glad I can turn to queer safe spaces--oh wait, I'm not usually welcome there because I'm not queer enough. Uhh ace spaces? Too stereotypical and don't belong... ah okay. Was already very suicidal but okay cool. Glad I'll never have love and support from anyone besides like 2 people in my entire life.

And this is why I spent years trying to be anything but who I am..

[Tigereyes]

Every day I wake up, my desire to end my life becomes stronger.

[Everglow.]

Don't give me attitude for asking you to do your literal job. You're being paid more than I am to do less than I do, so if I ask you to come and sit on the shop floor rather than shut yourself away in a back room, you can bloody well do it thanks. Not being paid enough to manage a grown man who thinks that just because I'm a woman, he doesn't owe me respect.

[Fanatic]

This world only makes me want to hate myself even more. Why can't I be neutral without being ridiculed? Why can't I have my own say and opinions? Why can't I love myself without someone saying it's wrong? Why is it so hard to just sit comfortably without stupid restrictions? This world is fucked up and I hate living in it.

[Kate*]

It's MY vacation, if I want to do absolutely nothing, that is MY choice. Everyone else had 6 MONTHS to stay at home and do nothing while I was stuck working. It's my turn for a break and I can spend it however I want.

[Tigereyes]

My life is hell and always will be, this country is hell and getting worse, everyone wants to take away my rights and wants me dead. We let the poor suffer and die on the streets, judging and blaming, but many just had bad luck like me. Honestly, why wouldn't I want to kill myself?

[Tigereyes]

I wish I was dead. I will never be fully accepted for who I am. Everyone wants me dead.

Oh my fucking god, stop pestering me! All you've done is text every day, "what's the plan? What's the plan?" I don't know what the plan is, and I've promised you over and over you'll know when I know. I'm sorry things around here don't run on the schedule you, or I, want, but get off my fucking back. I will let you know when I know something.

[Dawn.]

I just want everything to calm down.

[Everglow.]

Every now and then it just hits me all over again that I'm never going to see you again. I miss you so much.

[Kate*]

There's no easy way to do this. At least it's short.

[Starseeker]

My life doesn't make sense and if the meds are the last resort, what should i do when ive been taking them for so long and all i feel is that things are worse every day?

[Dawn.]

There's so much to do and I don't have the motivation to do it.

[Everglow.]

I don't want to bother you with another text but I really do want to know where to go so I can put some flowers down for him. Please don't forget...

[Tigereyes]

I'll never escape this debt or abuse. So why bother trying anymore. More debt, more abuse, more trauma and ptsd. that's what I get for trying to escape. Well fuck that. I quit. I'm done with this stupid life.

[Everglow.]

I'm not even close to coping anymore. I really dont know what to do.

[Tigereyes]

Goodbye to my human rights and to those of everyone close to me. We don't matter apparently. But I'm supposed to stay alive?

[Everglow.]

Spent all morning fixing YOUR mistakes and now I'm being sent to cover at the exact store I left because I was unhappy. This company wants their staff to have a panic attack. I'm going to cry.

[Everglow.]

I need a new job. I cant keep this up.

[Tigereyes]

Dear nobody,
Being alive sucks. I need to change that. Sorry I can't do anything right or good enough. It's best for everyone if I go. We all know it.

[Tigereyes]

I wonder if I can pay someone to kill me and make it look like an accident.

[Everglow.]

How have I been in this job longer than this other person and yet I'm being paid less? Wheres my overtime money for all the days I stayed behind half an hour here and there? Why am I literally working for free? Looks like a long overdue meeting is happening next week.

[Tigereyes]

JUST FUCKING END MY STUPID FUCKING LIFE. FUCK I DON'T EVEN CARE IF I DIE A SLOW PAINFUL COVID DEATH ANYMORE. JUST END MY LIFE HOWEVER. I DON'T CARE.

[Everglow.]

I cant just keep going like none of this is happening. I'm going to break soon.

[Dawn.]

I just want to be able to catch a break.

[Kate*]

i just need to delete this. If the fucking website would cooperate it wouldn't be a problem. Gotta love the overwhelmed government-run technology. All I can do is keep trying. I filed an appeal, which I doubt will work, but if I can't delete it, at least that's there now.

[Fanatic]

Stay away from me you creep! This is why I cant stand guys. Because of people like you.

[Tigereyes]

I was always the fuck-up kid

[Everglow.]

I'm having near-panic attacks at work and almost crying on a daily basis, but my mum thinks I'm an idiot for wanting to cut my hours because "that's adult life". So what do I do? I feel like nothing I do will ever be good enough and my own family don't even want to listen to what I have to say.

[Tigereyes]

I am absolutely terrified about the election. And I should be.

[Kate*]

I don't know who you are or who the fuck you think you are, but I am sick and tired of getting snippy ass notes left for me telling me how to do my God damn job! I'm the ONLY one whose done it MULTIPLE times EVERY shift for the last 3 fucking YEARS. Don't bitch at me because other people don't pull their weight. I work my fucking ass off and every manager will tell you that. If you think I won't consider quitting over being treated like this, you couldn't be more wrong. I'm NOT coming in on my days off to do YOUR job because YOU can't be bothered! Not to mention most if that sat there for WEEKS with specific instructions NOT TO TOUCH IT! Make up your FUCKING minds.

[Tigereyes]

I'm living like I'm about to die because I actually might be.

[Everglow.]

I've hit my breaking point now. I'm done picking up the slack. Either sort my contract out so I'm not working half my hours as overtime which I'm not entitled to holiday for, or I'm cutting my hours. I'm done now. This is too much for me.

[Tigereyes]

After this election ends, I don't need to stay alive. I wish I was dead. Most people wish I was dead.

[Tigereyes]

If I get covid, I WILL kill myself. Better than surviving to be more disabled or dying a slow painful death alone in a hospital. My parents are cool with that I guess.

[Tigereyes]

Who would even want to stay alive with it being this bad?

[Tigereyes]

I'M FUCKING LEAVING THIS FUCKING HELLHOLE. THERE'S NO SUPPORT FOR ME, NO LOVE, NOTHING. IT'S BEST FOR EVERYONE IF I WERE DEAD. IT KEEPS GETTING FUCKING WORSE EVERY FUCKING DAY AND NO ONE GIVES A FUCK. "JUST FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT, SMILE, BE POSITIVE!" WELL FUCK THAT!!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS CRUEL WORLD. I'M DONE SUFFERING THIS FUCKING SHIT EVERY DAMN DAY OF MY WORTHLESS LIFE. IT WASN'T WORTH STAYING ALIVE. THEY SAY IT GETS BETTER BUT IT DOESN'T. IT ONLY GETS WORSE. THE HARDER I TRY, THE WORSE IT GETS. THERE'S NO LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL AND I DON'T GIVE A FUCK. IT'S TIME TO GO. I'M FUCKING DONE STAYING ALIVE SOLELY FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO AREN'T EVEN HERE FOR ME. FUCKING GOODBYE I GUESS. LIKE ANYONE CARES.

[Starseeker]

It's really stupidly hurtful to see couples who were together when we used to be and they're still together while we're not anymore. You'd think that'd be the least problematic tbh. Like, c'mon. But it hurts. I don't know why. It's stupid how much such a triviality hurts.