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Why Me? Here is a safe space to let it all out, where you can rant about all the bad things life throws your way. Sometimes it just helps to ask "why me?"

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  (#4921 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 19th 2017, 08:14 PM

This is damage you did validated by truth and circumstances. I'm done.

This is either a reaction to all the crap they kicked up installing the AC or the beginning of a cold that's going to hold on forever. Worst timing ever plus meds mean I can't take anything for it.



Great, at least 6 hours of driving to an unfamiliar place and now it's going to be raining all day and on my worst day of the month no less. Still worth going, but really wish at least one of those things wasn't happening.


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Last edited by Kate*; July 21st 2017 at 03:45 AM.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 20th 2017, 05:07 AM

Life is kind of shit right now. Not sure why though. Things are going relatively well.
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  (#4923 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 20th 2017, 05:31 AM

I wish I know how to fucking drive. I can't stand having to take the bus or the train or ask people for rides. I feel like I'm a fucking child every time I say I don't have a license. I missed out on so much because I couldn't drive there. I want to be able to drive so bad but I'm terrified and I know I won't be any good. I'm so scared.


Savvy?

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  (#4924 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 20th 2017, 05:52 AM

I hate anniversaries.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 20th 2017, 09:03 PM

I'm having a hard time sleeping. I hope I can get a lot of sleep tonight.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 03:18 AM

Shit doesn't change. Not when you're 20. Not when you're 41. Not when you're 52. Rest in peace, Chester Bennington. I'm sorry.
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  (#4927 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 03:24 AM

How can I forgive you if you go to that party? If you willingly go to a party hosted by a man who did nothing when I was assaulted? You're going to support that? And you're going with a guy I previously dated, who you swore you had no interest in, who I've been trying to reconnect with and here he is texting you all the time? And you're obviously texting back, since he told me you were talking. "Oh, I'm not looking for any casual flings." Bullshit. If that's true then why the fuck are you texting him, potentially going to the party with him? You know you felt conflicted and unfulfilled after the last one, so why would you go again?

But mostly, most of all...why would you go when you know what happened?

I thought you were my sister. I thought you were my friend.

How can you?
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 04:44 AM

I wish I weren't struggling so much.
I wish I didn't feel so alone.
I wish I wasn't so scared of everything falling apart.
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  (#4929 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 06:31 AM

This hurts this hurts this hurts so much
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  (#4930 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 08:52 AM

Sad things keep happening but I don't have the energy to be sad so I'm just kind of feeling... nothing, really.


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you're a werewolf."
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  (#4931 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 01:37 PM

I'm listening to sad songs. I'm alone. I wish I could get help. I wish I was brave. I wish I had a tiny light of hope.

All of LP's songs doesn't seem the same anymore. I'm so angry in a way.


breathe. it's just a bad day, not a bad life.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 08:15 PM

I swear to God, if you call me sweetie I will chew you the fuck out.
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  (#4933 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 09:47 PM

Hate myself.


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  (#4934 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 10:24 PM

I can't believe that you said that to the vet and to dad. You don't get to talk to people like that, I get that he's your cat, but everyone is just trying to help your cat be ok. What is your problem?
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  (#4935 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 21st 2017, 10:57 PM

There's a good chance we're driving 3 hours each way for nothing!


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  (#4936 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 22nd 2017, 01:11 AM

I don't know what's going on
I know who I am and I don't know at the same time
and I don't know where everyone else is


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Re: Screaming thread. - July 22nd 2017, 06:12 AM

When the crisis text line doesn't respond <
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  (#4938 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 22nd 2017, 07:29 PM

I hate how hot it is!!!


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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Re: Screaming thread. - July 22nd 2017, 10:03 PM

Breathe and be calm. My sister drives me crazy and I hope it stops soon.
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  (#4940 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 23rd 2017, 03:07 AM

I can't wait until we get our lives back.


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  (#4941 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 23rd 2017, 04:13 PM

I hate how hot it has been outside lately. I'm so ready for fall.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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  (#4942 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 23rd 2017, 04:22 PM

I think the meds are making me gain even more weight than I already had before I started them. I need to lose, not gain!

I don't know which part of it was worst, and it's still literally EVERYWHERE! I don't even know anymore, I'm seriously done.


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Last edited by Kate*; July 24th 2017 at 07:06 AM.
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  (#4943 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 24th 2017, 01:12 AM

I'm so done. I'm sick of this yoyoing between wanting to be better, and wanting to be dead or struggling. I almost just want to give up.Also why did my phone fucking die, I was gonna reach out to someone but now i can't





From day one I talked about getting out
But not forgetting about
How all my worst fears are letting out
He said, "Why put a new address on the same old loneliness?"
When breathing just passes the time
Until we all just get old and die
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  (#4944 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 24th 2017, 10:18 PM

I hate feeling alone. I think Im having withdrawal symptoms of being on the internet too much I need to be distracted or my mind goes crazy. Hearing others' issues has made me depressed and I feel suicidal...I dont know..



"I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard
While you walk away with the frosting of my heart
So I'm taking back what's mine, you'll miss
The slice of heaven that I gave to you last night
." - "Cake" by Melanie Martinez


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  (#4945 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 25th 2017, 03:13 PM

I shouldn't have put off all the house work until today, and I know it. It's my fault I feel so overwhelmed trying to get everything finished before Jordan's Friend's come over tonight.


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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Re: Screaming thread. - July 25th 2017, 03:57 PM

I'm gonna get fireddddd
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  (#4947 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 25th 2017, 04:16 PM

I'm so fucking lonely


breathe. it's just a bad day, not a bad life.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 25th 2017, 05:30 PM

Could you do me a favor and shut the fuck up? That'd be fantastic. Thanks.
Oh, and, uh, go fuck yourself.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 04:10 AM

if I had blades I'd cut right now
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 04:41 AM

You know what you did, and so does He. I'll let Him deal with you after He helps me rebuild my life after the irreparable damage you did.

PLEASE STOP telling me how amazing the thing I wanted to do is. I should be doing it too, but I'm not the one who decided I can't.


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Last edited by Kate*; July 26th 2017 at 06:00 AM.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 05:30 AM

I feel so anxious and sad. Friday I have my appointment. Hopefully that goes well.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 07:13 AM

I'm not okay.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 08:58 AM

It's two in the morning and I can't sleep and have to be up by 4:30/5.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 11:59 AM

I tried talking with my sister and that didn't work. So I will try my parents next.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 05:15 PM

I hate how hot and miserable it is outside. Bleh!!


"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud

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Re: Screaming thread. - July 26th 2017, 06:40 PM

I wish he never passed away from cancer. I feel so sad now and I don't know what to do.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 27th 2017, 05:42 PM

I can't think of a bigger waste of time considering that I was already doing all of this. Even if I'm blowing 18+ hours a day on Facebook, I'm working through my shit at the same time. I want out, but I think it only lasts until January.


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Re: Screaming thread. - July 27th 2017, 06:22 PM

I'm shattered. Always doing the most at work and I rarely get recognition for it from managers. If it wasn't for a select few colleagues reminding me I'm good at this and pushing me to do well I'd be so done by now.


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Re: Screaming thread. - July 27th 2017, 06:26 PM

I feel like crying. I hurt so much.
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Re: Screaming thread. - July 28th 2017, 06:10 AM

"You can't change the system, but you can change your attitude towards it." breeds complacency and acceptance of the unacceptable. This is how horrible things stay horrible. There's a better way, spend your time finding it rather than forcing yourself to be okay with something when you aren't.

You know exactly what you did even if I still can't make sense of it. This is why I believe in Karma. He's a harsher judge than I ever could be and while I will have to face my own wrongdoing, so will you.
He knows the truth and that's enough for me. I know I'm supposed to "be the bigger person", but for now this is all I can manage.


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Last edited by Kate*; July 29th 2017 at 07:22 AM.
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