Schedule time for yourself

[Rivière]

With everything going on, we either have too much free time, or very little. Fortunately for me I've been placed on furlough and have a lot more free time since gyms are shut.

In the past I've had a client who worked as a teacher. She was always so busy doing things and even worked after hours beyond what she'd get paid for. One day I decided to sit down with her and help her organise some free time for herself because she quite literally didn't have any at all beyond going to the gym for an hour 30 minutes once a week.

A good way of scheduling free time is to:

1. Look at your calendar by month and mark off any specific events like a birthday celebration or a holiday.
2. Look at your calendar by week, and mark off the times you start and finish paid work.
3. Mark off any other additional weekly activities you do such as walking the dog or a weekly food shop.
4. Look at all the free time you have left and consider a day/time you'd like to spend your time doing something nice for yourself.

By something nice I mean having an at-home spa day where you run yourself a nice bubble bath, have a face mask on, paint your nails... or it could be that you go for a walk somewhere new and do some photography, practice a new skill like guitar or knitting, maybe even try video gaming if you've never done it before. The list is endless.

You don't have to use the method above. You could be spontaneous and just suddenly decide to treat yourself to something, or organise a trip somewhere. It doesn't matter how you schedule time for yourself, so long as you remind yourself to do it.

Practicing self-care is important and is a great way to help ease anxiety and reduce stress, even if it's for a short while.

[Everglow.]

These are really good tips, Sarah! Sitting down with your friend to help her organise time for herself was a good idea and I think we all forget to actually allow ourselves to just be, rather than being busy constantly.

I recently started making sure I wind down in the evenings properly by giving myself some kind of down time structure. If it's a bit cold, I'll make myself a hot chocolate, turn the main light off in the room and put on some fairy lights or my star light projector, and I'll watch something which makes me feel relaxed, like a sit com or an easy-to-follow documentary.

[Dawn.]

Thanks for sharing, Sarah!

I really need to engage in more self care.

[Sprite-1]

There are two distinct areas that ground me, but are very different. The first is the library that contains many books collected since my great-great-grandfather lived here. Julie put a coffee machine in the corner. It was a deliberate choice because reading books is our first choice to loose anxiety, and sipping coffee fixes our caffeine addiction.

Get lost in a book and any worries affecting me go away. Our library is so serene that I don't want to leave. My guitar is there, and Wendi's. Julie's grand piano takes centre stage, and I'll play a classical piece to calm my mind.

Imagine this scaled-down version of The British Library. Like our villa it has three floors flanked with walkways and mahogany railings to prevent us from falling. Our library smells of books. I love the old bookcases and Gothic Revival tables we sit at. See why this vast place chases away the worries, making self-care my Number 1.

Number 2 is our kitchen. My self-care becomes extra special when baking on a rainy day (as is lying in bed at weekends, lazy toads we all are!)

Number 3 is caring for Ted. He's always been my priority. He feels the same way about me. We've been together for 4 years and are engaged.

"Engaged?" People scoff. "At 13?"

I say, "What of it? We've been through hell." I give a level stare. "And who are you? Who are you to judge me for my youth?"

They make no reply. Because they have none.

Self care is also a tankard of rich hot chocolate. Or sitting in the forest listening to birds with Rascal.

I like the idea of having a system where you organize your day and week by different tasks that have to get done, different appointments that needed to be attended, educational and professional obligations... and, with all that, be mindful of setting aside your down time.

My schedule is so chaotic. I mean, my life itself is not chaotic, but I struggle to keep things organized. I don't use my phone calendar — and I really should! — instead memorizing — and sometimes failing — important tasks and appointments. I really need to get better at attending to a calendar or some sort of application to better hold me accountable.