Tattoo as an incentive to stop SH?

[Aintzane411]

So, both my cousin and I have recently struggled with cutting. Things came up and my mom ended up finding out about both of us, which in turn led to my aunt finding out. And so, as an incentive to stop cutting, my aunt offered to get my cousin a tattoo.

Is it just me or is that a really shitty way to make your own child stop cutting? I mean, when we first told my aunt, she was like, "Oh, it's just scratches, it's probably a phase, she'll grow out of it." Maybe I'm blowing things out of proportion, but I just wish that she would be more worried about her own daughter's health!

[calgary01]

Yeah i don't really even see how that would help...

[Chaazza]

Hey

This sounds mean but your Auntie should care more about your cousins health because obviously she is not don't this for attention well I would hope not there is a reason that she has done this and letting her have a tattoo will not stop her SH if she doesn't want to it will just make her SH in other places on her body making your Auntie believe that she no longer does it. How old is you cousin because she may regret getting a tattoo in later life because then it may bring back bad memories like for example why she did it.

If you need to talk PM me

Chaazza

[TheCrowing]

Besides your aunt being inconsiderate given the situation, the tattoo might actually make it worse. Tattoos are addicting too, and the pain from the tattoo might even trigger something. For me, getting a tattoo gives me this amazing feeling, but there's still the pain. And then the connection is made and I feel a small urge. Especially if the tattoo means something that may have been a trigger. It's never been bad enough where I've given in to it, but it's still there.

[Maloo]

I'm going to have to disagree with everyone here, because the reason I got my first tattoo was to quit cutting. It's a butterfly on my hip, and I got it as a permanent promise to myself that I wouldn't cut anymore.

[chility]

Originally Posted by Myss

I'm going to have to disagree with everyone here, because the reason I got my first tattoo was to quit cutting. It's a butterfly on my hip, and I got it as a permanent promise to myself that I wouldn't cut anymore.

But that was your decision and you wanted to stop.

I don't think bribery ever works with stopping SH to be honest?

[oOo.NICKI.oOo]

I completely understand where you're coming from about it being a weird way of attempting to get someone to stop cutting. I feel as though the incentive is her way of trying to help and trying to make the situation better.

From experience, I believe a lot of people who haven't cut don't always know the best way to handle the subject. Parents often try to assume that it's not a big deal and this "phase" will just go away. I think this is her way of dealing with the situation. Cutting can sometimes be a topic that make people very uncomfortable. As I'm sure a lot of us have noticed, cutting tends to be a very hush hush subject; no one wants to talk about it. Due to this, many people don't know how to react to the situation.

If a tattoo is very meanful to your cousin and is something that she really wants and it will help her to stop cutting then I'm all for it. However, if the idea of a tattoo doesn't help her to stop cutting then I don't see any real reason for this being an incentive for her.

I hope for the best for both of you. I know how hard it can be. Incentives can be very helpful when it's the right thing. Feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk

[Madeleine.Claire]

I agree with Nicki...

People who don't know what it's like to want to SH don't know how to stop it. I'm sure that your aunt is just trying her best to stop your cousin from hurting herself. If it is something that has meaning to her then I'm sure she'll at least try. Obviously she can't force herself to stop so I think you should explain to your aunt that it's still going to be a process.

<3

[TheCrowing]

Originally Posted by Myss

I'm going to have to disagree with everyone here, because the reason I got my first tattoo was to quit cutting.

See, that was your personal experience and your opinion. I also have butterflies on my arm, over the spot I used to cut. 6, one for each year I struggled. But I still felt it. I still get urges. It's not the same for everyone.

[Tonight]

I think a tattoo would be good incentive to stop if done in the right context.I plan on getting a tattoo over my scars (if it's doable) after I've stopped for 5 years (a goal I've always wanted to achieve).

[Maloo]

Originally Posted by TheCrowing

See, that was your personal experience and your opinion. I also have butterflies on my arm, over the spot I used to cut. 6, one for each year I struggled. But I still felt it. I still get urges. It's not the same for everyone.

I still get urges too, I never said I didn't.