The Most Confusing College Experience Ever

[OhHiThere]

So it goes like this: I'm in my freshman year of college, and my roommate, whom I roomed with at the overnight orientation, which led to us requesting to live together for the school year, recently told me that he is bisexual. He said that besides his friends from home and a select few people at our school, not too many people knew, but he wanted to tell me since we'd be living together.

Now I told him I was fine with that, and I really am, I don't have a problem with it. The thing is, we actually have a lot in common: I'm bisexual too. Only until recently no one in the world knew. But after my roommate told me I knew I had to tell someone, so I told my one female friend whom I trust with my life. She's been really supportive.

So this is where the story gets really interesting: I think I'm really falling for my roommate. We have so much in common, and I just think he's an awesome person with a great personality. I love spending time with him. Right now we're on Thanksgiving break, and I miss him like crazy. Only, he doesn't know I'm bi, and I'm kind of scared to tell him. It's not that I think he'll judge me, because obviously he couldn't really. It's just that if I tell him about that, I might have to tell him about the fact that he's the guy I'm attracted to, and what if he isn't okay with that? Because he probably doesn't feel the same way, I know I have to accept it, even though it hurts a lot. And on one hand I kind of want to tell him just in case something good actually does come of it, but on the other I'm terrified of ruining our friendship if he doesn't feel the same way.

What the heck do I do? This is all so very confusing :/

[Briana]

Well, I think you need to tell him, you never know what may happen but it could help you out. Just start at with telling him you are bisexual as well, and go from there, wait from a reaction on that and depending on what happens, tell him you have a crush on someone and be flirty with it and see where it goes from there. You never know, he may like you as well, but talking is important, at this point. Be honest and open with him. Good Luck. xx

[--.redpanda.--]

Coming from a person who is in a similar situation, if you hold it back, then it is gonna get worse. Trust me. Mine has gotten worse. So, go with what your heart feels and tell him the truth! Don't be afraid of judgement. If he does and abandons you, then that is his fault.

[Moxie.]

Wayne Gretsky once said "You miss 100% of the shots you never take." Why hold back? If you do, you could miss out on something amazing. Even if things don't work out, knowing will feel better than wondering what might have been. Good luck!

[leavemealone]

I would tell him that you were bi, and then slowly lean into telling him about your feelings. Not right away, but maybe after a while so you could give him hints about your feelings.

[Teddscau]

I don't think it'd ruin your friendship. If somebody told me they were bi or lesbian, and we're attracted to me I'd be quite flattered. Of course, I am a wee bit narcissistic I welcome anything that inflates my ego.

[Dream]

If you tell him and he doesn't like you, then that would be awkward, but he if does, then that would be great, wouldn't it?

If I were you, I'd risk telling him.