Triggering: Build Up.

[Dawn.]

I don't really post much on Teenhelp in regards to how I'm going, simply because I think I have everything under control. This time, however, I feel like I don't. At the same time, I wouldn't say I am losing control as such but I just believe that I'm barely holding on as well.

And it's all down to work. I work with children and have done so for the last 10 years. To put it nicely, I no longer wish to work in this industry anymore because I don't have the passion for the job nor is my wage high enough for my level of experience or for my qualification. I've been trying desperately for a very long time to find another job where I can make more than what I do now. I don't expect to be making a shit ton of money every year (though that would be nice ), I would love to be making enough where I can live comfortably and where I don't have to be working 2 jobs. I often work 6-7 days a week, which is taking a toll on my physical and mental health for obvious reasons and I feel guilty for not spending as much time as I can with my boyfriend or family. I often neglect things that I love to do such as reading and I don't have the motivation to study or spend longer at the gym to complete a proper session. I haven't been eating as well as I should have and I genuinely have been riddled with anxiety and frustration at myself for not being more motivated to do things.

[Rivière]

I'm glad that you chose to post and write out how you feel. I don't work two jobs per se, but I work in a gym as a fitness coach, and as a personal trainer. I spend 6 days a week in the gym. I only ever get a break on Sunday. The 6 days I do work, sometimes I can be there for 10+ hours a day. Especially if I have to get up early to prep and travel to work, meet a client in the morning, and then finish at 10 PM. By the time I get home it can be gone 11 PM. By the time I have dinner and talk to my mum, it's past 12 AM and I'm well and truly ready for bed. Then the cycle begins all over again. I don't earn a great amount but its enough to keep me going. For me, I earn as much as the effort I put in, and as much as people are willing to part with. Given the pandemic, it's not a lot, so I'm often living from payment to payment trying to pay for my expenditures and support my family. Overall, I completely understand and know exactly how you feel.

It's incredibly tiring having to do all the things you do. I think you've worked extremely well, and for 10 years in that industry. That kind of experience is valuable.

What kind of job would you be more interested in? Is it one that relates more towards your hobbies and interests? Or is it just something that gets you out of your current job?

Have you spoken to any friends and family about how you're feeling? I understand that as you work a lot you may not be able to chat with them face-to-face, but what about giving them a message or something and see what they come up with? What about any family friends that may be hiring, or know anyone that may be hiring?

Another thing you could consider is having a look into some job agencies. Or try putting your CV online and on as many sites as you possibly can to try and get some advertisement of yourself.

I expect you've already considered these options, but I thought I'd mention just in case you haven't.

[DeletedAccount53]

Originally Posted by Flight.

I don't really post much on Teenhelp in regards to how I'm going, simply because I think I have everything under control. This time, however, I feel like I don't. At the same time, I wouldn't say I am losing control as such but I just believe that I'm barely holding on as well.

And it's all down to work. I work with children and have done so for the last 10 years. To put it nicely, I no longer wish to work in this industry anymore because I don't have the passion for the job nor is my wage high enough for my level of experience or for my qualification. I've been trying desperately for a very long time to find another job where I can make more than what I do now. I don't expect to be making a shit ton of money every year (though that would be nice ), I would love to be making enough where I can live comfortably and where I don't have to be working 2 jobs. I often work 6-7 days a week, which is taking a toll on my physical and mental health for obvious reasons and I feel guilty for not spending as much time as I can with my boyfriend or family. I often neglect things that I love to do such as reading and I don't have the motivation to study or spend longer at the gym to complete a proper session. I haven't been eating as well as I should have and I genuinely have been riddled with anxiety and frustration at myself for not being more motivated to do things.

Without intending to come across as patronising, but you have done extremely well working with children these last 10 years, in a job that would drive me round the bend! And now Julie and I have a preteen sister, we'll probably soon be preaching to the choir.

You mentioned working 6 to 7 days a week; I'd say you're heading for burnout, nevermind wanting a new career. I know how anxiety can get to me because it affects my appetite, makes me a grumpybum and I know full well I should get on and tackle what worries me, but the bugbear is everyone else's: the covid crisis.

But there is one sure way that can help you take stock over a new career is to get relaxed, and that sure way is reading. Reading relaxes like no other (apart from a nighttime scotch, but I digress). If you and your boyfriend can take some time out and reach that relaxed state, then you will be to rationalize where you want to go in a new job.

This morning I was writing to a friend and gave her a couple of useful sites to browse, one of which was 'Prospects'.

https://www.prospects.ac.uk/ ; namely job sectors: https://www.prospects.ac.uk/jobs-and...ce/job-sectors

So maybe this site could help you narrow down some options. Best go to it when you're chilled with a nice cup of tea and your hoofies up.

This type of work must be so draining, but have you some friends you could talk to? Ones who can be trusted to keep schtum and search around for you, because delegating a problem out can multiply your chances of finding a nice job that would suit you.

I've saved a lot by washing cars, 3/4 of them posh, but you need stamina for that. Done dog walking, too, but I took out personal liability insurance as a precaution. But if I find a money-making idea that won't zap your energy, I'll pm you.

Sarah mentioned job agencies. That's a goodun. But when you need to write an email, here is a wonderful site, "How to write an email with military precision". https://hbr.org/2016/11/how-to-write...tary-precision

Well, all my very best. Hugs.

[Dawn.]

Thank you for your replies. I appreciate it.

You know what? I haven't even thought about job agencies. How silly am I? I did have a passing thought about sending my CV to different agencies but I totally forgot.

Childcare has affected me in more ways then one and I would love to eventually own a bar/pub/restaurant but with this current climate, I would be a fool to do so. I would like to become a history teacher and do photography or still bartend on the weekends. Right now, I just want to work somewhere where I can earn enough and still have a life while I study if I do decide to go back to university.

My parents and boyfriend know about how I feel about the childcare industry but I don't know if they know the true extend of how I feel.

[Rivière]

Would it be an issue if you told them how you truly feel? If they know it's that serious, then maybe they will be able to make a bigger effort in helping you.

[Dawn.]

Originally Posted by Rivière

Would it be an issue if you told them how you truly feel? If they know it's that serious, then maybe they will be able to make a bigger effort in helping you.

I have no issues telling them. I'm just so tired with what I do.