School is making me suicidal

[0001]

I am going to keep this short and sweet.

I have never liked school. even when I first started, I did not enjoy it. I am now a senior in high school and I have 4 months left until I graduate, but I have become extremely unhappy with myself and school that i do not think I cane bare going these next four months. I have absolutely no motivation to get up in the mornings. Sunday's nights, after the weekends, are the hardest for me. I sit up all night and think about going to school and it literally drives me insane. my body gets so tense and it makes me want to throw things or punch something. I start imagining different ways to kill myself and it's not good. I've tried telling my mom how unhappy I am and how I want to finish the year doing online school, but she doesn't really listen to me. if I do not get out of school, I really think that I will end up failing, or hurt myself. I can't really explain what it is that I hate so much. I do not going to the same place everyday and seeing the same people everyday and being told what to do. I also get extremely nervous when I have to talk teachers or do presentations, and I have a very low confidence. I'm taking three classes that I trchnically don't need to graduate, but I can't drop them and its making me stress out a lot. I honestly have no idea what to do.

[luckiicloverxx]

Hey there,

Have you tried talking to some teachers at school about what you're going through? They may be able to help you with your situation and even with talking to your mum about online school if you really need it.

But for the time being, try finding something that can help you distract yourself. A hobby or maybe just hanging out with a friend can help you relieve the stress that you're experiencing from school.

Feel free to PM me if you ever need anything!

[ForgottenSunrise]

Hi,
Trust me I know exactly how you are feeling. High School has so many pressures and stresses to deal with and it can feel really overwhelming. I know for me, graduating high school was like a release from all the social stresses that were making me suicidal as well.
Just try to hang in there. You made it all this way. Don't let these last 4 months break you. I agree with what was previously mentioned about talking to a teacher. If your mom wont listen to your concerns, maybe having a teacher on your side to talk to her could make her reconsider.
In the mean time, try to do as much as possible to take your mind off of school and make yourself feel better. Schedule times outside of classes and homework for some "me time" to de-stress.

[Always *]

It's hard for a lot of people to understand the problems. Also, your mom might just disagree with the method you expect. Your mom might understand that you are unhappy and just believe that disappearing out of school won't help at all.

Honestly, I don't think I blame her for that. I learned to hate school while I was in kindergarten. It's a love hate relationship for me - I am smart and I love learning, but I am also disinterested in the academic process and school causes me such extreme stress that I've wanted to hurt myself on multiple occasions and am current.y seeking counseling because of it.

I don't think that disappearing will help because you're ultimately not dealing with the things that are causing the depression. Trust me, it's not like I don't understand the misery that school can cause in your life, but I do think that by seeking help (ex. taking to a guidance counsellor, regular counsellor, seeing medical treatment etc.) might make a huge difference.

I have to wonder what will happen when you get to college or university? "Good" degrees aren't usually offered online. And same with careers (trust me, my current job ramps up my anxiety like you wouldn't believe). It's nice to think that taking online courses now will help, but it's like a bandaid on your mental health issues, you don't actually learn coping skills. Ultimately, what will benefit most is daeling with it in a way that allows you to be surrounded by your stressors without becoming severely depressed.