Im having the worst anxiety i dont know what to do

[RoyalFurry]

i could use some help my gf is 16 and im 19 and we been fighting alot on and off about 3 times a month during our 2nd months dating weve been talking for 9 months total and im in love with her and shes in love with me we got in a huge fight on last sunday about me and her and i asked what did she want and she said she didnt know i wanted a answer riggt there i said okay take all the time in the world but dont be surprised if im gone when u decide she cried for a hour! so we actually made up that night in person and we had sex and she said she loved me right after it and i didnt reply amshe wanted me to come over the next day so we can talk about us and fix a few things and i said okay i was leaving work in monday she calls me saying that we cant see each other my mom isnt allowing us to see each other and i got soo upset she said i was being possessive and i made her anxious and i that i had people watching her which is sorta true . The reason i had 2 people spy a lil bit i found out from my bestfriend that her bestfriend had a video from September of her letting another kid kissing her neck i talked her bestfriend the video was deleted and she admited to it and i confronted to my girlfriend on sunday . She lied which made the argument a lil rowdy but we calmed down and talked normal. But getting to the poikt she told me her mom didnt want us being together and that we need space and that we arent good for each other any more and i asked if she was breaking up with me on the phone right now she said she didnt want to but her mom is making us break up but she sounded like she was gunna cry and said she had to go.tuesday i showed up to her house and no one was home she tried saying she wasnt home but she finally came to the door and we talked and she said i was her first love and i was the first person she cared about and she said maybe in the futre we could be together again. I asked if we could be together snd go back to what we used to be amd she said she had to talk to her mom and see if thats okay.she texted mr 4 hours later that night saying goodnight i replied the same and i havent talked to her For about 3 days . I called her lastnight crying about my friends being stabbed and she said idk what to say were not together anymore i think you need to get help. She said she needs space i said okay. What do i do i want to go to her house and talk to her mom? Is that a bad idea? Should i give up and say to her im coming by to get my clothes ? I love her so much. But heres a lil update i just got back from her house and she wants to be friends and i wrote her a 3 page letter saying goodbye when i got there she answered the door i asked to talk and she said yes and she said shes not ready for a relationship amd that shes done with this like i want to try and get her back . I understood and said okay fine lets hangout soon and she said ill see, and she and me talked for 30 mins just about everything and we were smiling and laughing and she went to get me to give her a kiss on the cheek i sorta gave her one and then i said could i get one last kiss and she gave me one last kiss and i left . She texted me and i asked her should i leave you alone for some time she said no its fine. Rn im have extreme bad anxiety because i wanther back and my friend got put in the hospital for being stabbed and he might die and i was supposed to be with him 2 days ago when everything went down and i told him nahh i want to stay home because im stressing out about my girlfriend. What doooooo iii dooo about all this i want my girlfriend and if my friend dies im gunna loose it 😫😫😫😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩

[fallingstargirl]

Hey,

I'm sorry you're upset right now, and I think you have the right to be with everything going on. I'm so sorry about your friend I really hope he's okay. I think you should visit him when you can and talk to someone about it that knows him or understands what you and him are going through at the moment.

As for your girlfriend, I think you need to give her a little space at the moment. She's asking for space, she's saying she doesn't want to see you anymore, and she told you that she's anxious about things right now. No matter how much you feel like you need to talk to her, it's not going to be good for her if you keep showing up at her door. She's a lot younger than you, and especially since you had people follow her and spy on her, she may not trust you as much as she used to and needs space to work things out.

Hope that helped! Message me if you ever need anything or want to talk.
~Estelle

[Philomath]

Hey Chris,

Welcome to TeenHelp!

I am sorry to hear about your friend. Hopefully he is recovering well and will be able to leave the hospital soon.

In regards to your GF, I am with Estell on this. You need to do what is best for her right now even if that goes against how you are feeling emotionally towards her. She has asked you on more than one occasion to give her space so it is important you respect that and do as she asks. In the mean time, maybe you can hang out with some of your guy friends, visit your friend that is in the hospital if he is still there or visit him at home.
Try keeping yourself busy so you do not overthink/obsess about this girl.

I hope that this reply helps. I am sorry if it seems a bit confusing; I can clarify anything that may not make sense.
Take care and keep us updated.