Non-PG13: Bullied at school

[SakuraNeko98]

I'm currently a 9th grader about to be a sophomore and this school year has been really bad for me and my small group of friends.

This year, I started being extremely clingy with my boyfriend. I walked down the hallways hugging him all the time. It often got to the point of being sexual. People started bullying us for it. One day, I got sick of it when a girl started bullying me at the lunch table. I yelled at her to shut up and we got into a fight. Luckily, one of my friends broke it up.

After the fight, things were terrible. People I didn't even know were bullying us. I was invisible before the fight happened. I can't even hear the word "bitch" without getting extremely anxious and possibly having a panic attack. Things have gotten better since then, but people still bully us sometimes.

I know what I'm doing is wrong, but that doesn't give them the right to bully us. It's summer break and I'm still extremely stressed out and anxious over the fight. They even threatened one of my friends into joining in.

I hate the school I'm going to right now and I know moving schools won't help, so I'm planning to ask about online classes so I don't have to deal with bullying. I'm also scared to talk to an adult because I don't want them to say we shouldn't be clingy in public and ignore the problem.

Please tell me what I should do. I don't want to be so afraid and depressed because of this.

[mrabused]

Hello there mate, sorry to here that you're through all of this stress.

Bullying is not the victims fault but rather the culprits. It's not something we can really avoid.. People want attention and all of that, that's why most people tend to bully and do other stuff. I would suggest y'all to just act like you guys are friends... well... friends in a relationship (I have no idea what I'm saying) but you get the idea right? just act like you guys are friends and there's nothing "special" between y'all.. I think things will be alright then, by the way don't get stressed over the summer, we're suppose to enjoy it. And they'll probably forget about it by the time school reopens.. That's the only advice I can give

Take care of your self mate!

[SakuraNeko98]

Thanks

I'm planning to calm down a little next year on the hugging and stuff, but to be clear, we're mainly clingy because of mental illnesses.

[Everglow.]

Hey,

I'm sorry that bullying had made school difficult for you. I know how it feels to be anxious in a school setting and it really does make enjoying yourself there a hard thing to do. You should know that the way you act around someone you're in a relationship with has nothing to do with anyone outside of it. Sadly, in school people do gossip and poke fun at others. It's all too common, however that shouldn't mean you're uncomfortable being affectionate around your boyfriend in public. How you choose to act as a result of them is entirely up to you, but don't feel like you have to hide yourself because of other people. If you want to carry on being as affectionate as you have been and both you and your boyfriend are fine with that usually, then carry on if that's what you want. Remind yourself that in a few years most of them will have forgotten you and your boyfriend and will never speak of it again. I find it always helps me if I remind myself that people will likely never see me again after a certain point.

Telling an adult can be worrying because they do have a tendency to tell you to ignore it, but it's harder than that. I don't think this should put you off, though. If there's a counsellor at your school, perhaps you could have a chat with them about what's going on as it's their job to help you find solutions beyond ignoring situations which make you unhappy. Otherwise, if you have a teacher you trust and get on with quite well you could confide in them as well. They may be able to offer you some solutions at school to help make it less daunting for you.

[SakuraNeko98]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you understand.

I've been told all the time to ignore it, but it's hard to ignore when they're sometimes yelling at you and you're extremely sensitive.

I might keep being so close to him, but I know it's not right to keep doing it just because of our mental problems and love for each other when there's a rule against it. I know they'll find a way to bother us either way though.

If it'd help, maybe I'll talk to our school librarian or my past teachers about it. They know about our relationship and some of our problems.

[matthewmatters]

in my first year of college, one or more guys said stuff that werent kind or true, because of a female friend i had and i had mentioned talking about stuff that you wouldn't just talk to anyone about. i had an idea maybe they didn't have that kind of connection with a girl at the time - they could be envious possibly of what we had. you mentioned a girl and your boyfriend. perhaps she hasn't had a boy who meant that much to her as yours does. its easy for people that age to act spiteful to others because they are jealous of what they have, but they should still deal with it better