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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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WhisperingSilence Offline
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How to approach this? - December 19th 2021, 09:44 PM

Basically I've got a friend who I've been friends with for like a little while but we've drifted recently and I've like been very distant with her, she's like an energy vampire, very intense, very sort of in your face , loud, gobby, very clingy and very very annoying....
I dont really see her much, I did when I was in college doing my course last year etc and when I was playing for my previous football team as her son plays for the junior part of the team I was previously on, she also goes to an art group I used to go to, she's the reason I no longer go to the art group as she took it upon herself to tell the people that run the art group that I couldn't go anymore because it was on the same day as college (which okay is fair enough during term time but when it was half term etc I could have gone).

Also she constantly messages me on Facebook, tags me in really random posts that I don't really wish to be tagged in (mainly things about depression etc and alot of my family on fb etc dont know about my mental health ) I have asked this friend numerous times to not tag me in things and not to post adverts for beauty treatments etc onto my timeline /Facebook profile as I don't want those sort of things on my profile etc. she stopped for abit but she has recently started doing this again, not just that its the constant messaging on messenger, if I dont reply to her on messenger. she texts me, whatsapps me. rings me, messages me through any way she can... I have told her to back off numerous times but no luck. I've now like had to 'mute' her and unfollow her on Facebook and click the take a break button on Facebook.... but its not stopping her. its constant, I have asked her nicely to just lay off the intensity of the messaging no luck, today I replied to her as she had sent me another advert for a beauty treatment thing to me on Facebook messenger I replied with no thank you, I have told you lots of times to not send me this sort of thing. she replied with no need to be rude... and then said well your alive then?

I literally don't know what to do anymore... I've tried the nice approach, I've tried the please dont, the please lay off messaging me so much its way to much (she will send me like 40 messages a day over various different messaging platforms), tag me in posts , post to my timeline and such like , I've tried the if I dont reply its not that I'm ignoring you it's just I am busy approach... I've tried the firmer approach of like saying that I just need some space, its got the to point where I feel the only way forward is to tell her to basically F off and leave me alone....

anyone got any ideas on what I can do other than the F off approach ?


'There will be bad days, there will be good days, there will be really bad days, and really good days, and days that are not bad or good but just simply suck, but either way you got through it and you are here today and that is all that really matters''
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Re: How to approach this? - December 21st 2021, 01:10 AM

Unfortunately, I think a more blunt approach is exactly what you likely need to do. You've clearly had the patience of a saint with this person. They've not taken any message even though you've been quite forward and honest about it. Sometimes the only way to deal with a situation, literally is the F off approach.
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Re: How to approach this? - December 21st 2021, 12:13 PM

Hey,
thanks for reaching out. Unfortunately I have to agree with Sarah. Apparently your acquaintance doesn't understand what you've asked of her, so you are left with two options: put up with her or cut her off completely.
Best of luck.
xxx S


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
WhisperingSilence Offline
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Re: How to approach this? - December 21st 2021, 09:08 PM

I’ve just like unfriended her on facebook hoping that it was like stop her she tagged me in more stuff tonight


'There will be bad days, there will be good days, there will be really bad days, and really good days, and days that are not bad or good but just simply suck, but either way you got through it and you are here today and that is all that really matters''
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