How to open up to friend?

[TH Anonymous]

[SIZE="a"]This might sound a bit weird but I have a close friend...and yet I've somehow managed to keep them at arms length away from me without really meaning to.

It feels like they don't really know me, and yet, they have previously given indicators that they would like to get to know me e.g. asking personal questions.

I want to tell them but I chicken out. It's scary being open, honest and vulnerable.

I feel like I write too much, include details that may not be relevant, shows me in a bad light etc. I worry that now isn't a good time or that it's too late (they haven't read my messages in quite some time).

I used to be an open book and tell people everything about my life but that stopped when I felt I was bothering another friend so I thought I should keep everything to myself instead (so as to avoid bothering friend and others). But I don't want to do that anymore.

Any ideas on how to overcome this?[/size]

[Starseeker]

Hello,

thanks for reaching out - it's a big and brave step you took

As you said, being honest may make us vulnerable and thus it may seem scary. However, it is often worth the effort; if the person we choose to tell our story to is understanding and sympathetic, they will likely accept you as you are. This could lead to strengthening the bond between you and make you feel more comfortable.
What's most important is that you need to decide when (or if) you feel ready to tell your friend anything. If they ask personal questions you are comfortable answering - that's great; if they ask questions and you do not want to answer - that's perfectly okay as well (as long as they do not put any pressure on you).

If you are having doubts whether you should share personal details with your friend, maybe it is not the best time. You could wait for a better occassion or for a moment when you feel ready. Again: in the end, it should be you who decides.
I hope this helped. Have a good day and good luck!
xx S

[Astro04]

Surely, nobody else than your family will know more than the others, even it's a close friend. But unless you're a cold blood killer, there's nothing to hide. If you want to answer at the question or not it's a your decision! There's nothing wrong about it.