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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.
Should I contact my old friend? -
May 5th 2021, 11:11 AM
[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]2 months ago, I had a major disagreement with one of my close friends. We both still wanted to continue our friendship but decided it was probably for the best to end it. It was not a bitter ending. Just a painful, sad one. We were both trying to change our lives. It was something I needed to do alone; he needed to be around people who would make sure he's on track. We were not the best of ourselves at the time and our friendship might have caused a strain on the changes we were trying to make.
There was also the issue of me lying about something and him finding out. But all was forgiven and he said he understood why I did it. Nevertheless, I felt guilt and anytime I saw him after that, I would be overcome with self hatred for lying. So things got weird between us after that. I couldn't be myself. That's when our relationship neared it's end. He said he would talk to me when he felt like it but I never heard from him again.
I miss him a lot and I think about him every other day. He's always said I'm special in his life. But I'm not sure if he would want to talk to me again after what happened. I have changed since then and I want to fix our problems and start over.
Should I contact him, give him some more time or should I just accept that it's over and move on?[/size][/color][/font]
Re: Should I contact my old friend? -
May 5th 2021, 07:13 PM
Hey
From what you've said here, it sounds like you and your friend found a very mature and mutual way to deal with the disagreements you were having. I've been in a similar situation of having to end a friendship because it was no longer a healthy and happy one, so I know it sucks to lose someone you care for. I'm glad you feel like you've worked on yourself enough to try again though. I think that shows a lot of strength and you should be proud of yourself for that.
I feel like it's definitely okay for you to reach out, but bare in mind that everyone processes and deals with things differently. Just because you choose to reach out, doesn't mean he has to or will respond, so I think if you're willing to accept that this might happen, then you're not in the wrong for trying to make contact.
That being said, I don't think there's a right or wrong thing to do in this case. If you chose not to contact him, that would be okay too. Moving on is sometimes a good thing, and it wouldn't be wrong of you to want to do this either.
Either way, I hope you manage to find a way forward that works for you and your friend.