Feeling really depressed through lack of freedom from parents, suicidal thoughts.. :(

[youarewhatyousheep]

I just feel at the end of my rope. My parents control all aspects of my life including my entire day's schedule with little to no time for leisure for myself or to make decisions for that personal time. I cannot negotiate with them because they control what little leisure time I have. I feel very stressed out because I am going into my final year of high school with constant advice that if I don't do well it will be very bad for me, and I too believe this, but that is what my parents use to be so controlling. I no longer have any time to hangout with friends. One of the major conflicts other than school is technology. I have an iPad with strict restrictions for no games, no installing of apps and a filtered wifi, which has small if any time during the day when it is unblocked, otherwise everything is blocked. Right now I have 15 minutes to type before the wifi is blocked and this is when my parents are out otherwise if they saw me writing this I'd get my iPad taken away which is the only thing I have for leisure and they'd justify it as a misuse of their trust and more of my iPad time to talk with friends gets taken away. I don't own a phone with anything more than rudimentary calling and texting capabilities, (2006 blackberry brick) and to even use that I have to pay my dad money that I earn for doing work to get more credit and even then only he has access to the account to add it, meaning he also checks my phone logs and text logs removing all privacy I have with talking to my friends or if they see a girl's name they will give me a big talking to about girls in high school being a distraction and then not allowing me to talk to them again. We don't have a pc anymore because my dad thinks that it'll "add to my distraction". I can't have a civilised discussion about anything with my parents as it always evolves into a yelling match about me being a spoiled brat who doesn't know what's good for me or me getting smashed in the face. I have tried to bring up conversation about changing the rules but they Yell at me and tell me they're disappointed for me even suggesting it. Nothing but study everyday and the gloom of year 12 with little contact outside of school with my friends has really put me in a corner and I feel like I can't deal with it. Suicide enters my head when I feel really down. How do I cope?

[David Armes]

I think that you should try and talk to your parents. If you tell them that you are feeling that way then they may feel bad and change things for you. You say that your parents are controlling your life but I am sure that that is not the case. You are a very special person and I am sure that they love you.

Suicide is not the option. There are much better ways to express your feelings. I always find that squeezing a soft ball and deep breathing helps me when I am feeling like that.

Your parents probably just want to protect you. Just having a calm chat can help to move a situation on into the future and live a happy life. Wok with them and if you are honest to them then I'm sure that they will help you.

If you ever just want to talk to me then you can, I am always here for you

[Green Yoshi]

Hello

I think it's best to have a heart-to-heart with them , and tell them that you want a little more time to enjoy being who you are, and they are just worried that you'll get into trouble. However, I do agree that what they're doing is a little too overbearing.. a little too protective. It might be best to rant out to them civilly and calmly in order to slowly get them to understand your feelings. It might take them some time to understand you and really start to help you, but it'll eventually work.

Parents will always love their children, especially in cases where children are overprotected. Some of them are just too worried, too protective and so they err on the side of caution. But once you get them to understand, things will improve and you'll be able to enjoy more freedom.

However, if they don't act like how you want them to and they don't give you more leeway, then it might be time to rebel, because everyone deserves a childhood. Being sheltered and prevented from mixing around can be detrimental to someone, and sometimes you just gotta make things work for yourself. No matter what, you deserve to survive and be happy because you deserve to experience fun and happy moments with friends where you will smile many , many times over.

If you want any more advice or just a friend to rant to, remember that I'm always here and that my pm box is always open. It's good to rebel sometimes, too.. because I'm pretty certain that your parents are a little overprotective, and it might be a need for you to get some childhood fun yourself. You deserve happy memories