Hearing your parents have sex.

[SophieR]

My mum has recently started dating this guy. He is black (I have nothing agents black people), has tattoos and a criminal record. He and mum first met at the start of this year and around him me and my 3 siblings were very much excluded. On the first night that he stayed for dinner I heard him and mum having sex, wow what a great impression!! Anyway after that one night he and mum have been louder and louder each night. My room is across the other side of the house and I can still hear them.

I just really need to get this off my chest because it's been bugging me for ages and I can't go to sleep without the fear of being woken up by them which has happened many times before.

Thanks for all your help and yes I do use earplugs but they've almost always fallen out by the time they do it.
I just find it really gross and disturbing especially because I have a younger brother who just turned 10 and doesn't need to hear those things.

Thank you thank you thank you for all your help!!

[Thereishope]

You should ask your mom if you can talk to her for a minute alone and just explain to her that you can hear them at night. Hopefully they'll keep it down after. I'm sorry that you have had to go through this and hopefully it can be resolved soon.

[Skyline]

Hey there Yeah I've also accidentally heard my parents getting at it and it bothered me for so long. For a few months I couldn't look at them the same and I felt sooo digusted and irked out. But eventually I realized that it's just a part of their romantic relationship, and that it's normal, and gradually I kind of forgot about the details of the incident and now it doesn't bother me...
But as this isn't a one-off occasion and you can hear them every night, I would honestly leave them a note saying something like "the walls are thin"...

Hope this helps!

Skye

[xcloudymindx]

Hey, Very cringe! My mum has just started dating a new guy so I hope the tables don't turn that way for them also haha xD Maybe have a talk to your mum?

Just explain: "Mum I'm old enough to know what sex is, and its nothing to be embarrassed about therefore you should be open for discussion with me - I can hear you and 'enter her mans name here' at night and its disturbing my sleep, is there anywhere you could quieten down or at least respect that me and 'your brothers name' are in the same house, it just makes me uncomfortable sometimes and I worry if I'm gonna be wakened up at night especially when I need the sleep for (school,college,etc) I don't mind it happening but on a level of fairness we need to make it equal, your entitled to your life but you still have youngsters living here" - Something like this, if she gets worked up or offended at discussion just say "At least think about it" and walk away. Also if you can't brave talking, write a note and place it in her bed or under the door, or send a text message to her.

Hope things improve soon enough! Best wishes xx

[Coffee.]

Honestly, I'd just bring it up to her. That's affecting you and your brother's quality of life. Be tactful. Heck, maybe just say "I've been hearing you both talking loudly in your room" or something, and she'll probably get the hint. That, or leave a note if you want to be a bit more clear about what you're hearing, as that doesn't put her on the spotlight but gets the same message across.