Using alcohol as a confidence booster...

[Zeus]

Hi all,

I've been at uni now for four months. When I first started uni I hadn't really drunk much in the past, and like many first year students I'd drink when out a night down town. However, in the past few weeks here I've become slightly more and more reliant on alcohol, particularly vodka. Due to drinking so much, my tolerance to it has risen - I'll now need maybe 3/4 of the bottle to get a full drunken feeling from it. Either way, a bottle won't last for longer than two days.

My concern is how much I'm now drinking. Instead of only drinking during nights out, I'll buy a bottles of vodka throughout the week when I feel like a drink, which is more and more. The main reason I do it is the amazing confidence boost I get from it which gives me the ability to be extremely chatty and upbeat (providing I don't drink *too* much, in my terms). For example, this week I've bought (and drank) five bottles of vodka. I've almost gotten to the point where I'll crave/want some when I know I'm going to be in a social situation. Without it I'm pretty shy and feel like I don't have a whole lot in common with many of my friends (I live in a flat of boys who are all typical boyish guys, into sports etc, where I'm quite the opposite..although we are friends).

After drinking over a bottle on Friday night (in the space of about 12 hours) I recall a female friend sitting me down and telling me she's not the only one who has noticed how much I'm drinking, and that drinking problems can start at any age. I felt horrendously ill yesterday which really had me worried as I don't usually get hangovers at all! I know many people my age joke about how much they drink, but it's quickly starting to become something I'm embarrassed about mentioning.

[anony mouse.]

Here's the shitty side of your situation--you may think you're the coolest, funniest, most charismatic guy in the room...but in reality, you could quite possibly be really annoying. A lot of people just get louder when they're drunk. They think that they're having a treat time when they're actually just pissing off everyone around them. You stated that you're drinking to get more confident--that's a really good first step towards quitting! You have identified the underlying cause for your drinking. Now, what I would suggest is that you could start doing some confidence exercises. This could include creating a 'confidence mantra': a phrase that helps you feel more confident as you repeat it. There are many more ways to bolster confidence. I believe the root of cinfidence is having high self-esteem. That's easy to raise. Taking care of your body and health is a good start, as well as doing things that make you feel good. Make sure these things DON'T include drugs, alcohol or anything in excess that can be harmful, though! I hope my suggestions helped. I'm always around, so drop me a PM or VM whenever.

[Jesus Christ.]

There's nothing wrong with drinking to gain a bit of confidence, it's quite helpful actually, but that's usually means a pint or two, not half a bottle of vodka (assuming you're on about ~40% not the cheap 20% crap you can buy x.x)
The upside is that you have noticed that you're drinking too much, and it shouldn't be too hard to cut down though, considering that you've not actually been drinking for that long a period of time. Just try drinking less, or move onto different drinks, like beers or cider and wait for it to kick in before you drink any more, it's not completely instantaneous.