So is it an eating disorder, or just a problem?

[Tiny_93]

Hey

i've struggled with my eating in the past, and have gone from being anorexic to bulimic, and then into recovery and got better.. but recently i've realised i'm kinda slipping back into bad habbits!

i never wanted to go back to being ill, but i've notice a pattern - when i'm angry or upset with someone or something, i use my eating as a weapon. e.g. if i've had an argument with someone, i'll skip a meal and blame that person for me not eating! but i know it's not their fault, and that its mine...

i hurt a lot of people when i was ill and its not something i want to do again. i know its me being stupid, but it feels like the ED's are trying to control me again as mad as that sounds..

is there anything you guys can suggest to help?

Laura_xx

[Jen]

Hey Laura,

You definitely don't sound crazy or stupid! That's exactly how eating disorders work--they watch out for when you are most vulnerable and then jump and try to latch on. Your brain knows that when you are vulnerable (stressed, upset, angry, etc.) you would be more likely to allow the eating disorder behaviors to come back into your life, because you're desperate for something to make you feel better, even if it's negative behaviors.

Now, it's great that you are being proactive--the key is to recognize the urges to use behaviors and stop them before they turn into a full-fledged relapse. So, what are you going to do to stop? I'd say the best thing you can do is simply remind yourself, "Eating disorders are not an option". Don't even consider behaviors as alternatives. So when you are feeling upset or having a hard time, and looking for a way to cope, don't allow yourself to consider restriction or purging or binging, etc. It's not an option. Instead, you need to use the healthy coping mechanisms--reaching out to someone, getting help, reading a book, putting on music, etc.

Were you ever getting any counseling or anything? If so, it might be a good time to start that up again, just in a preventative way. Or, at the very least, reaching out to parents or other supports is good. Having support, and people to talk to, is the best way to prevent things from getting bad again.

Remember, Laura--it is entirely in YOUR control if you relapse or not! That can be a powerful truth to remember. If you don't want to slip, you won't. You can do this! I believe in you.
<3

[Tiny_93]

Remember, Laura--it is entirely in YOUR control if you relapse or not! That can be a powerful truth to remember. If you don't want to slip, you won't. You can do this! I believe in you.
<3

Thank you for that, it means a lot. I am trying not to slip back, but sometimes, it all feels a bit much if that makes sense... Im gonna bear in mind what you said thank you

Laura_xx