Triggering (ED): Upset

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""][FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]Somedays I have a very hard time eating, it can take me over an hour just to eat something simple like yogurt for example and then other days I can eat breakfast or lunch or dinner. On the days that it's hard to eat, I have on my headphones and I'm listening to music to try to help myself eat and I get so upset when it's taken me forever to eat. I have a problem with food, I've had it for a while and now I need to get help. The problem is I don't like to bother others about what I'm going through and I need a therapist or a eating disorder treatment center to help me. I'm on my parents insurance, I don't want them to know about this because they are not together anymore, everyone else in my family is always so busy so I don't want to bother someone. Sometimes I'll make myself sick because I always feel so fat and I hate myself so much I cry and want to be alone. I feel like I'm not a good person for doing this to myself.[/size][/color][/font][/size][/color][/font]

[Rika]

Hello there Girl,

Thanks for writing into the TeenHelp Forums. I noticed you mentioned having a hard time eating, and it can take you over an hour to eat. I also realize you get upset whenever it takes you long to eat.

I totally get not wanting your parents to find out about you seeking therapy or so for this. I would probably talk to whichever parent you are comfortable with about this perhaps? I know you don't want them to know about it, but if this were me I'd talk to one of my parents and get their advice and thoughts. I know they're not together anymore as you said. Also, maybe perhaps talk to another family member when they're not busy? Maybe they can speak on your behalf on the issues and go from there.

I am hoping that you can get the help you need! I really wish you the best in whatever you do decide to do.