How to tell them

[TH Anonymous]

[SIZE="a"]Lately I've been struggling with my eating disorder. In all honesty my ED is the worst it's ever been. I've been having issues for a couple of months now and it's severely impacted my health. I am an adult and live on my own, so up until this point I have been able to hide what's going on from my mom and my stepdad. However, I was texting with my mom today and she suggested that next weekend we have breakfast or eat together.

This presents a bit of a problem. Part of what's going on with this episode is that I am very triggered by food in general. I feel anxious when I approach my own refrigerator. When I was briefly in a cafeteria the other week I had a panic attack. There's not way I can do a restaurant.

Before all this, though, my mom and I would have breakfast every other weekend or sp. It would be strange, if not a red flag, for me to decline. She came over to deliver dinner a week or so ago and she noticed I was thinner, so she might connect the dots (she knows I have an ED but didn't think that might be what's going on because it's been like three years since I've had trouble).

I realize I am probably going to have to tell her what's up. I just have no clue how to do that. I feel a lot of shame about what's happening, for reasons I won't get into. Normally I am fairly open with my parents (to an extent), but this time I have shut them out on purpose. I would love to have their support, but I don't know if that's the reaction I'd get. I sometimes feel my mom doesn't take my ED seriously because I am overweight, and because it's not usually a problem (I have an episode every few years). I am not sure how my stepdad feels about it. But this one is really, really bad, and different than my normal issues. I don't feel like I recover. I am quite depressed and feel stuck, and I am afraid to tell them that, too. But I know I probably should. I knew I would have to do it eventually, but I was hoping not this soon.

I just don't know what to do, and if I tell them I am worried my mom will insist I live with them or something, which I don't want at this time. She probably won't, but my anxiety kind of runs rampant right now.

Does anyone have any suggestions? I could really use some, because I have no idea how to approach this.[/size]

[Arabesque- golfing girl.]

Hello,

I am so sorry that you are having a hard time with this right now and hope that you will be okay soon.

When we are having a hard time with something it can be very hard to open up to our parents about what we are going through. Sometimes they may not understand what we are going through. You said that your mother doesn't take your ed seriously, and I'm sorry that she does this. Would you be able to try talking with her on the phone or in person before you go and have breakfast with her? It can be a few days before. You can also try talking out loud by yourself about what you want to try saying to her, so when you are talking on the phone or in person you know what you are already going to say. If you are able to find someone to help you out with the ed, you can also let her know this too. No matter what happens when you are talking to her, try not to get upset because you are a lovely person inside and out.