Triggering (Abuse): Raped

[Arcenciel]

Get your attention? I'm sorry, I can't remember a time where somebody actually responded to a post I made in WWSD, so I never really know "what staff would do" because I have not gotten feedback to anything I post in here.


So a week ago I got raped by a friend. I went to emergency room because I was experiencing a lot of pain, and a special nurse had to come (sexual assault response team) and do a full physical exam in the light and then again in the dark (with a forensic light that made my tattoo glow. that was pretty cool).

It sucked.

I'm struggling a lot now, and nobody gives a shit. I can't do anything. This is the second time I have gotten raped in the past 6 months, and nobody knows. Not my parents, not my therapist fully, nobody. I can't tell anyone, and won't.

Police are not involved.I have mutual friends with these people who raped me, and I don't want them, my parents, anybody to know. I also don't want to go through a trial, and I don't want to create waves with anybody.

I know that nobody will respond because we seem to be hypocrites on this website saying we're there for each other and that we are a "family". Nobody cares about me, and I"m worthless.

My therapist is also away for the week, and I don't see her until the very end of the month either way. I have nobody. Just me and my flashbacks.

I was also physically, sexually and emotionally abused up until about 8 months ago when we moved out of that house. I hate everything.

Jenn.

[Palmolive]

Hi there.

I am really sorry that you're going through this and that you feel this way towards the site. I know we haven't spoken before (at least I don't think we have) but I wanted you to know that I DO care about you and that I am always here for you if you ever need anything, whether its to talk about whats happened or to talk about random shiz to take your mind of things.

I know you say you can't and you won't but I really think talking to someone such as you therapist would be a really good idea. I know that's going to be hard, but this is clearly having a negative affect on you and taking about it and expressing your emotions to someone might really help.

Like I said, I'm always here if you ever need anyone and remember you are never alone this. What you have been through is awful and no person on this world should have to deal with going through that sort of experience. I wish i could take the pain away from you because you don't deserve it at all.

You're worth so much more. Keep fighting.
Jessie xx

[Minerva McGonagall]

I understand where you are coming from about not getting any replies. I normally don't, either. But please just know that I care about you, and I'm truly sorry you are going though this. Please know that you matter, and that you are important. <3

[WashoutThePain]

I learned that telling no one makes everything harder, longer and worse. Therapy won't work for everyone. Telling friends or family won't work for everyone. You need to find what works best for YOU. Take some time and treat yourself. Take care of your body. Stay away from any dangerous situations.

I found that my college support group was the best source of support and help. They have provided me with invaluable things-- conversation, understanding, compassion, support, guidance, information, knowledge and more. I highly suggest you look into one of your own-- they apparently one of/ if not the best treatments for sexual assault/rape. Take control of your recovery and get help.

You can get through this <3 Be strong.

[bailatyvm]

Oh my goodness lovely; I am SO sorry that this happened to you. Like those above me said, keeping this bottled up isn't going to help..you need to figure out a plan that's going to help keep you safe; both mentally AND physically. At that requires you to tell somebody about what's happened. Tell someone who doesn't know the people, to start. If you feel uncomfortable with it getting out then don't LET it get out. There are ways to avoid that.
I care, and I hope things start to go up for you. Stay strong lovely <3

[Coffee.]

I'm so sorry this has happened. Sexual assault is a horrible thing to go through alone. My recommendation would be to talk to your therapist about it. She won't tell your friends or parents, but will help you cope. Obviously, she will WANT you to tell. But at least you can get some professional advice from the situation. But talking to your friends would not be a bad idea. This may be slightly off, but I heard a statistic that the average rapists attacks four times. This may not be their first offense, it it may not be their last. Your friends could have also gone through something, or will go through something, and it might be good to warn them so this doesn't happen. And plus, if they're real friends, they will believe you and want to help.

And I know how you feel that nobody listens. I think that we all feel that way to an extent. I think the problem is that everybody is so sucked into their own lives, that we have trouble listening to other people. It's sad, but true. And I apologize for not listening before, and I promise I will listen better in the future.

See those buttons in my signature? PM/VM/? You are welcome to message me anytime. I promise you I will listen. You don't have to go through this alone.

[Evanesco]

I care about you. I'm really sorry this has happened, you don't deserve this. Remember, you are beautiful and wonderful and people do care.

I really recommend talking to your therapist, you need to speak to someone. Things like this are awful to keep to yourself, don't let this weight keep weighing you down.

I'm always here if you want to talk about anything. I answer PMs and VMs more than I check this forum, and seriously, I'd love to be able to help. I can always be a (virtual) shoulder to lean on.