Touched and raped by my cousin, uncle, and dad

[Beara]

It first started when I was 5 years old. I was at my uncles house because my mom and dad were working that night. Me and my little brother were sitting on him watching a movie. My little brother fell asleep so my uncle put his hand down my JP's. He touched me and hurt me. I never told my mom or dad because he said he would hurt them if I did. I was 7 years old when my older cousin touch me and made me touch him. That happened for 4 years. I didn't tell because I was scared he would hurt me more. At that time I couldn't sleep because the dreams.
When I was 10 my mom and dad were no longer together. My dad was the longest and most painful. He did this for almost 6 years. I didn't tell my mom because I was scared he would hurt me even more than he did. My dad put hes penis in my mouth and up my butt, I couldn't even go to the bathroom without crying. The only thing I could do is close my eyes and acted like it wasn't happening to me. The only way I could cry without my mom seeing me is taking a shower or acting like I was sleeping.
This pain I knew would never go away. So the other day on the 6/10/12 I talk to someone about it and I found this website. They said I need to tell so they wouldn't do it again. So I told the person I trust my cousin Ashley. I don't have any sisters and she like a sister to me. I told her and she said the my uncle did the same thing to her for 5 years And he told her the same thing, that if she told he would hurt her mom and dad. She didn't want to tell either and she still haven't only me and my other cousin. And she told me next time the happens call 911 or her and she will for me.
Yes I still have dreams I get shaking and depressed.
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW MORE MESSAGE ME!!!
Thanks for reading!

[Storyteller.]

Hey Cierra. Welcome to the site.

I've moved this from A&D (which is mostly for introductions and welcomes) to R&A, where you'll be more likely to get advice and support, since that seems to be what you're looking for.

If you have any questions or feel it shouldn't have been moved, feel free to get in touch.

Take care.

Hey there,

If you are currently being abused you need to go to the police, talk to your mom or another trusted adult and get some help so that you can get out of this situation. I know that speaking up about these things can be hard but you do not deserve this type of treatment and the only way you can get out of this situation, safely, is by speaking up about it.