Triggering (SH): Harming myself- self harm triggering

[Astar]

I’ve been self harming for years, usually when things get too bad and have built up for so long and I need to let it out. Recently though, especially info’s last month or so I’ve been harming myself over everything. Small hints that wouldn’t have bothered me before cause me to snap now. I know I’m not happy, I genuinely real depressed all the time. My harming has got worse. It went from occasionally scratching myself to biting, badly scratching myself to bleed, pinching, using sharp objects etc. Recently I’ve also started [EDIT] myself on the head. The first few times it was gentle but now it’s hard with the intention of giving myself [EDIT]. I’m scared. But I can’t stop. I really don’t want to keep living like I am and the harm gives me a break.

[Celyn]

Sorry you haven't received a reply yet.

I'm also sorry to hear that you have been self-harming for years and recently it's been worse. It makes sense that when you are feeling depressed and keeping things in and building up that you would feel the need to self-harm to get that release of feelings.

When we have relied on self-harming, it may feel that how you used to self-harm doesn't help you as much and so you may be tempted to try other methods, which may cause more damage. It makes sense that this would scare you and you may feel a bit out of control, not being able to stop.

It seems like your self-harm is partly down to things building up and you needing a release. I'm wondering if there is anything you can do to perhaps stop things building up so much? Maybe you can talk to someone, call a hotline or write your feelings down? You can also try releasing emotions in other, safe and healthy ways, like crying, shouting or punching a pillow etc. I'm not sure if you've seen our alternatives resource but you might want to check it our for ideas on what to do when the urge to self-harm hits as well as longer term coping techniques too. You might also want to try the 15 minute rule- waiting 15 minutes to see if you still want to self-harm, and if you do, try waiting another 15 minutes. With time, you'll notice the urge to self-harm will decrease.

And lastly, if you haven't already, you might want to talk to a professional, such as a counsellor to help deal with your feelings and urges to self-harm. You don't deserve to hurt yourself, trying to get a break from things. You deserve better