Talking about self harm with my step niece

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Hi,

My 17 year old step niece has self harmed in the past. She recently started again. I saw the self harm but didn't say anything since it was in an obvious place, so I was pretty sure people knew.

I got upstairs and my mom mentioned it to me again.

She prefaced this conversation by saying my step niece's phone was taken because she was sending sexually explicit messages to someone she's never met in person and also had several private accounts. This is not the first time she's done this.

I guess after that she started self harming again. My mom said she'd have me talk to her because I stopped self harming.

The problem with this is that the only reason I stopped self harming is because I secretly got myself on medication. As the depression reduced, so did my urge. Now that I'm off, the urges are back and I've had a very minor slip up (it was so minor I don't count it as a relapse). All the other tools I've used to avoid self harm involved the Internet, which she no longer has access to.

So, I'm not really sure what to say to her. ;nosweat: If my mom does have me talk to her, what should I say?

Hey Dez,

I don't have a lot of advice since I'm assuming you don't want your family to know you were on meds. If you don't mind them knowing I would maybe talk to your step niece and let her know that you quit because you were on meds. I'm not sure if your family is against therapy but maybe suggest that she talks to her parents about that. Or if you don't think she will trigger anything for you, maybe tell her your willing to talk to her once a week or twice a week so she has someone safe to talk to.

Another idea I have, is if her parents will allow her to look at the computer screen when your on it I would suggest pulling up the alternative thread and go over it with her and either write down the ones she think she will try or print some of them off, so maybe copy and paste into word.

That's actually all I can really think about. I am sorry if this isn't helpful.

your Friend,
Frankie<3

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My brother in law (her father) doesn't seem to do anything about it except punish. My mom told my sister she needed help though and my sister has the "not my kid" attitude, unfortunately.

My sister knew I was on meds but that's it, I am a bit scared of my step niece accidentally letting it slip if I tell her.

You were helpful though!