An experience of self harm

[Palmolive]

I think I want to write an article of my experience of self harm including a little bit about me and my experience, helpful tips and alternatives that I've used, what's helped me and what might help others etc.

But I'm not sure.thoughts?

[coolkid98]

Hiya Jessie,

I really like that idea of an article, I've found this article which gives seven steps to be self-harm free. But as long as you have different things to write as alternatives then your idea will be fine.

Let me know if you need any help with it.

[hocus pocus]

I like this idea. I think writing about your personal experience will let other people know that they're not alone.

[coolkid98]

How are you getting on with this idea Jessie? Don't hesitate to contact me if you need a hand with it.

[Palmolive]

Originally Posted by coolkid98

How are you getting on with this idea Jessie? Don't hesitate to contact me if you need a hand with it.

Ive just started this so hope to have in finished in a few days. Thank you.

[coolkid98]

Originally Posted by Ailurophile

Ive just started this so hope to have in finished in a few days. Thank you.

Okay, I look forward to reading it!

[Palmolive]

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Ailurophile)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feels beneath the self harm itself.

When I was nine, I started self harming. I'm now nearly 22 and I still do self harm. Never has it been easy. Its led to twelve hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss to the point of passing out and having a fit like experience. However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head. The thoughts that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it so do I or don't I?

For me, it all started from my background. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger, like my mum having mental health problems and being in hospital while I was left with my sister and my dad too look after us which was very hard. Along came a separation of my parents and a divorce which is still one of the hardest things I have to accept. My sister developed anorexia which was tough on us all. While I was at home hurting myself, she was in a psychiatric ward for anorexia and soon it became me who was the one in hospital.

My longest stay was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from harm, which was for women with borderline personality disorder but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm. I thought when I became discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was so wrong. Since I've need stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, had to have surgery and have also had three hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me, but something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to get the risk of myself harm, lower but the truth is it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and it's a constant battle.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone. Recovery isn't easy at all but it can be well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk too and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[hocus pocus]

I like this so far. I did notice that you have switched between writing numbers out, like "nine" and using actual numbers, like "22." It might help to switch to one or the other to stay consistent.

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Ailurophile)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self harm itself.

When I was nine, I started self harming. I'm now nearly 22 and I still do self harm. Never has it been easy. Its led to twelve hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss to the point of passing out and having a fit like experience. However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head. The thoughts that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it so do I or don't I?

For me, it all started from my background. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger, like my mum having mental health problems and being in hospital while I was left with my sister and my dad too look after us which was very hard. Along came a separation of my parents and a divorce which is still one of the hardest things I have to accept. My sister developed anorexia which was tough on us all. While I was at home hurting myself, she was in a psychiatric ward for anorexia and soon it became me who was the one in hospital.

My longest stay was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from harm, which was for women with borderline personality disorder but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm. I thought when I became discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was so wrong. Since I've need stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, had to have surgery and have also had three hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me, but something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to get the risk of myself harm, lower but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and it's a constant battle.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone. Recovery isn't easy at all but it can be well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk too and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[Palmolive]

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Ailurophile)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self harm itself. Hope can stay alive as long as we keep fighting.

When I was nine, I started self harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I do remember it well and it's a scary thought to think I'm now nearly twenty two and I still self harm. Never has it been easy. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self harm, but that's not the case. I've wanted self harm but at time it's been hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down and so on. For me it has led to twelve hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head. The thoughts that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it so do I or don't I?

For me, it all started from my background. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger which professionals believe lad to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as well as other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and these are things I still struggle with today. I know a lot about my disorders but understanding them from my point of view is hard and I've come across many people who can relate to that.

My longest stay was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from home, which was for women with borderline personality disorder but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm. I thought when I became discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was completely wrong. Since I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery and have also had three hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me, or anyone even but is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to get the risk of myself harm lower but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and it's a constant battle.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it can be well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT, CBT and CAT.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[coolkid98]

Hiya Jessie,

I like what you have written so far, would like you like me to suggest some edits now or give you a chance to expand on your article?

Let me know if you need a hand with it.

[coolkid98]

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Ailurophile)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self harm itself. Hope can stay alive as long as we keep fighting.

When I was nine, I started self harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I do remember it well and it's a scary thought to thinkthat I'm now nearly twenty two and I still self harm. Never has it been easy. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self harm, but that's not the case. I've wanted self harm but at time it's been hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down and so on. For me it has led to twelve hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head. The thoughts that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it so do I or don't I?

For me, it all started from my background. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger which professionals believe lad to me having[Jenny: I think there is typo here, and I'm not quite sure what you mean.] Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as well as other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and these are things I still struggle with today. I know a lot about my disorders but understanding them from my point of view is hard and I've come across many people who can relate to that.

My longest stay was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from home, which was for women with borderline personality disorder but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm. I thought when I became discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was completely wrong. Since I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery and have also had three hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me, or anyone even but is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to getreduce the risk of myselfmy self-harm lower but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and it's a constant battle.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it can be well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. [Jenny: Maybe link the distractions for self-harm here?] Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT, CBT and CAT. [Jenny: Maybe give a brief overview of these different therapies.]

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[Palmolive]

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Palmolive)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self harm itself. Hope keeps us alive so all you have to do is keep hope alive.

When I was 9, I started self harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I remember it well and it’s scary to think I'm now 22 and I still self harm. Self harm became severe for me when I was 15 which is where my hospital admittance's began to psychiatric wards. I find that I can cope better now with the support I have although it is a constant battle and never has it been easy. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self harm, but that's not the case. I want to stop self harming but it's hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down, punishment, a release of emotions and so on. For me it has led to fourteen hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches, staples and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss which caused Anemia to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head not about staying in hospital and being put under general anesthetic for surgery etc, but the thought that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it, so do I or don't I? I also believe for a lot of people it can become a habit and/or addiction. It can be hard to break the cycle we can get in to with self harm but it is possible.

For me, it all started from my past expereinces. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger such as being a young carer, living with someone who struggled with anorexia, separation of parents, abuse etc which professionals believe led to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as well as other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and depressive episodes and these are things I still struggle with today. I know a lot about my disorders but understanding them from my point of view is hard and I've come across many people who can relate to that. Having a diagnosis has helped me get certain treatments so as much as I do not like to talk about what I'm diagnosed with, I also like to share that it helped for the reason I stated.

My longest stay in hospital was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from home, which was for women with borderline personality disorder (BPD) but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm after life threatening behaviours and therapy interrupting behaviours. This stay in hospital was the hardest. This is when I was first detained for being a risk to myself and when I first went on to maximum observations. I continued to self harm in hospital and engage in life threatening behaviours but things slowly began getting better. I thought when I was discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was completely wrong. Since I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery and have also had five hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me or anyone even but is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to reduce my self harm but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and a constant battle. Not only is it having the urges, but it’s the nightmares, when you see the scars and it triggers you or makes you sad and for me, looking back at what I have put my family through, to the point where they asked me to arrange my funeral so they know what I wanted because they thought that I was going to kill myself due to the severity of the self harm, kills me inside but now I try to focus away from that. I focus on the future. If I am in a state, sometimes I will remind myself of the past and where it’s led to encourage myself to keep on fighting.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it is well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will but always remember recovery is possible.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. [Jenny: Maybe link the distractions for self-harm here?] Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT, CBT and CAT. If you are struggling with similar issues and feel you need help and might benefit from these, it is always a good idea to talk to your doctor or therapist to see in what way they can help or if they can point you in the right direction for support in these area's.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[hocus pocus]

Thanks for updating this. I have a few suggestions. I did put all the numbers in orange because in some places, you say "9" and other places you'll spell a number out "nine." Maybe you can spell them all out for consistency?

An experience of self harm
By Jessie (Palmolive)

Living with self harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate too. However, we can learn ways to manage self harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self harm itself. Hope keeps us alive so all you have to do is keep hope alive.

When I was 9, I started self harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I remember it well and it’s scary to think I'm now 22 and I still self harm. Self harm became severe for me when I was 15 which is where my hospital admittance's began to psychiatric wards. [Consider rewording to make it clearer. "my hospital admittance's to psychiatric wards began."?]I find that I can cope better now with the support I have although it is a constant battle and never has it been easy. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self harm, but that's not the case. I want to stop self harming but it's hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down, punishment, a release of emotions and so on. For me it has led to fourteen hospitalizations, needing medical care such as stitches, staples and surgery and has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss which caused Aanemia to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. [This last sentence is a little long, could be hard to follow.]However, the harder part of it for me is the constant battle in my head not about staying in hospital and being put under general anesthetic for surgery etc, but the thought that I don't want to keep doing it but I need it, so do I or don't I? I also believe for a lot of people it can become a habit and/or addiction. It can be hard to break the cycle we can get in to with self harm but it is possible.

For me, it all started from my past expereinces experiences. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger such as being a young carer, living with someone who struggled with anorexia, separation of parents, abuse etc which professionals believe led to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) as well as other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and depressive episodes. and tThese are things I still struggle with today. I know a lot about my disorders but understanding them from my point of view is hard and I've come across many people who can relate to that. Having a diagnosis has helped me get certain treatments so as much as I do not like to talk about what I'm diagnosed with, I also like to share that it helped for the reason I stated.

My longest stay in hospital was two and a half years in a unit a long way away from home, which was for women with borderline personality disorder (BPD) but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm after life threatening behaviours and therapy interrupting behaviours. This stay in hospital was the hardest. This is when I was first detained for being a risk to myself and when I first went on to maximum observations. I continued to self harm in hospital and engage in life threatening behaviours but things slowly began getting better. I thought when I was discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was completely wrong. Since I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery and have also had five hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self harm isn't just something that can go away for me or anyone even but is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to reduce my self harm but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and a constant battle. Not only is it having the urges, but it’s the nightmares, when you see the scars and it triggers you or makes you sad and for me, looking back at what I have put my family through, to the point where they asked me to arrange my funeral so they know what I wanted because they thought that I was going to kill myself due to the severity of the self harm, kills me inside but now I try to focus away from that. [That sentence is a little too long.] I focus on the future. If I am in a state, sometimes I will remind myself of the past and where it’s led to encourage myself to keep on fighting.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it is well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will but always remember recovery is possible.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. Using distractions, I think, is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. [Jenny: Maybe link the distractions for self-harm here?] Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as DBT, CBT and CAT. [Maybe you could write these therapies out, then put the acronyms in parenthesis?] If you are struggling with similar issues and feel you need help and might benefit from these, it is always a good idea to talk to your doctor or therapist to see in what way they can help or if they can point you in the right direction for support in these area's.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[Palmolive]

An experience of self-harm
By Jessie (Palmolive)

Living with self-harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate to. However, we can learn ways to manage self-harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self-harm itself. Hope will keep you alive, as long as you keep hope alive.

When I was nine, I started self-harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I remember it well and it’s scary to think I'm now twenty two and I still self-harm. Self-harm became severe for me when I was fifteen which is the time when I had my first admission to a psychiatric ward with thirteen more to follow. Some days can be so hard, others are not so bad but I try hard to use my skills and distractions. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self-harm, but that's not the case. I want to stop self-harming but it's hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down, punishment, a release of emotions and so on. For me it has led to fourteen hospitalisations, needing medical care such as stitches, staples and surgery. It has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss which caused Anemia to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. I remember I used to go in to school with severe wounds from the night before. I was always sent to hospital due to telling a teacher or due to bleeding through my clothing. However, for me the hardest part is the constant battle in my head. I have a side of me where I want to stop and live a life without self-harm but I also have another side of me that feels like I need self-harm in my life in order to manage and deal with situations and even everyday life. I also believe for a lot of people it can become a habit and/or addiction. It can be hard to break the cycle we can get in to with self-harm but it is possible. I feel for myself, that it is certainly an addiction.

I believe I began to self harm due to my past experiences. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger such as being a young carer, living with someone who struggled with anorexia, parents who were mentally unwell, separation of parents, abuse etc which professionals believe led to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I also have been diagnosed with other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Bulimia, Eating Disorder not otherwise specified (EDNOS) Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) tendencies and depressive episodes. These are issues I struggle with on a day to day basis. I know about my disorders but people around struggle to understand these disorders. Having a diagnosis has helped me get certain treatments such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT). I personally dislike being diagnosed with these disorders as I fear people will judge me if they know I am diagnosed with them. However, they have helped me get the correct support and treatment I have desperately needed.

My longest stay in hospital was two and a half years in a unit a 130 miles away from home. This was a unit for women with borderline personality disorder (BPD) but in my individual therapy, I focused on self harm after life threatening behaviours and therapy interrupting behaviours. I think this stay in hospital was the hardest. I was first detained under a section 3 for being a risk to myself. I also was put on maximum observations here for six months and other times but shorter, which is something that had never been in my care plan before. I continued to self harm in hospital and engage in life threatening behaviours but things slowly began getting better with many ups and downs. I feel like sometimes I really needed to be in hospital, but not always. I also feel like being in hospital so many times for the length of time I have been in hospital, as taught me many new ways to self harm due to picking up behaviours from other patients. I thought when I was discharged, that I would never self harm again but I was completely wrong. Since I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery more than once and have also had 5 hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self-harm isn't just something that can go away for me or anyone with issues like myself. It is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to reduce my self-harm but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and a constant battle. I can be triggered by so many different things on a day to day basis. And the hardest part about it for me is that I feel like I need it but I don’t want to put my family through it any more. My family have gone to the extent of planning my funeral due to the severity of my self-harming. I don’t want to ever put them through this again. I try to focus on the future. If I am in a state, sometimes I will remind myself of the past and where it’s led to in order to encourage myself to keep on fighting.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self-harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self-harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it is well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self-harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will but always remember recovery is possible.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. I currently have two psychiatric nurses (CPNs) who I seek weekly, a support worker, support from my GP every 2-3 weeks, support at University, Crisis team support and a consultant psychiatrist. Using distractions is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Anything from watching TV, petting pets, going out with a friend, having a bath, doing work, cleaning, going for a run etc, can be beneficial. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Cognitive Analytic Therapy (CAT). If you are struggling with similar issues and feel you need help and might benefit from these, it is always a good idea to talk to your doctor or therapist to see in what way they can help or if they can point you in the right direction for support in these areas.

I still self harm on a regular basis. However, it is not always severe and I don't self harm as often. I still end up in A&E often needing stitches but it's been months since I needed surgery. I have support in place and family who help me as well as good friends and of course Teenhelp. I'm scared about what my future holds me in terms of self harm, however I also know this is my responsibility - it just isn't always that straight forward but I am using my skills and trying my best.

You can click here to go to Teenhelps list of alternatives to self harm. Just remember not everything works for everyone so it's about trial and error and finding what helps you best.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self-harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.




Edited I'll check for edits often!

[Halcyon]

Sometimes 'self-harm' was hyphenated, and sometimes they were not, so I have gone ahead and hyphenated them all. I hope you don't mind.

An experience of self-harm
By Jessie (Palmolive)

Living with self-harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate to. However, we can learn ways to manage self-harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self-harm itself. Hope will keep you alive, as long as you keep hope alive.

When I was nine, I started self-harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I remember it well and it’s scary to think I'm now twenty-two and I still self-harm. Self-harm became severe for me when I was fifteen, which is the time when I had my first admission to a psychiatric ward with thirteen more to follow. Some days can be so hard, others are not so bad but I try hard to use my skills and distractions. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self-harm, but that's not the case. I want to stop self-harming but it's hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down, punishment, a release of emotions and so on. For me it has led to fourteen hospitalisations, needing medical care such as stitches, staples and surgery. It has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss which caused Anemia to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. I remember I used to go in to school with severe wounds from the night before. I was always sent to hospital due to telling a teacher or due to bleeding through my clothing. However, for me the hardest part is the constant battle in my head. I have a side of me where I want to stop and live a life without self-harm but I also have another side of me that feels like I need self-harm in my life in order to manage and deal with situations and even everyday life. I also believe for a lot of people it can become a habit and/or addiction. It can be hard to break the cycle we can get in to with self-harm but it is possible. I feel for myself, that it is certainly an addiction.

I believe I began to self-harm due to my past experiences. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger such as being a young carer, living with someone who struggled with anorexia, parents who were mentally unwell, separation of parents, abuse etc, which professionals believe led to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I also have been diagnosed with other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Bulimia, Eating Disorder not otherwise specified (EDNOS), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) tendencies and depressive episodes. These are issues I struggle with on a day to day basis. I know about my disorders but people around struggle to understand these disorders. Having a diagnosis has helped me get certain treatments such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT). I personally dislike being diagnosed with these disorders as I fear people will judge me if they know I am diagnosed with them. However, they have helped me get the correct support and treatment I have desperately needed.

My longest stay in hospital was two and a half years in a unit a 130 miles away from home. This was a unit for women with bBorderline pPersonality dDisorder (BPD) but in my individual therapy, I focused on self-harm after life threatening behaviours and therapy interrupting behaviours. I think this stay in hospital was the hardest. I was first detained under a sSection 3 for being a risk to myself. I also was put on maximum observations here for six months and other times but shorter, which is something that had never been in my care plan before. I continued to self-harm in hospital and engage in life threatening behaviours but things slowly began getting better with many ups and downs. I feel like sometimes I really needed to be in hospital, but not always. I also feel like being in hospital so many times for the length of time I have been in hospital there, has taught me many new ways to self-harm due to picking up behaviours from other patients. I thought when I was discharged, that I would never self-harm again but I was completely wrong. Since then, I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery more than once and have also had 5 hospital admissions to acute wards since. Now I realise that self-harm isn't just something that can go away for me or anyone with issues like myself. It is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to reduce my self-harm but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and a constant battle. I can be triggered by so many different things on a day to day basis. And the hardest part about it for me is that I feel like I need it but I don’t want to put my family through it any more. My family have gone to the extent of planning my funeral due to the severity of my self-harming. I don’t want to ever put them through this again. I try to focus on the future. If I am in a state, sometimes I will remind myself of the past and where it’s led to in order to encourage myself to keep on fighting.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self-harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self-harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it is well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self-harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will but always remember recovery is possible.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. I currently have two psychiatric nurses (CPNs) who I seek weekly, a support worker, support from my GP every 2-3 weeks, support at University, Crisis team support and a consultant psychiatrist. Using distractions is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Anything from watching TV, petting pets, going out with a friend, having a bath, doing work, cleaning, going for a run etc, can be beneficial. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Cognitive Analytic Therapy (CAT). If you are struggling with similar issues and feel you need help and might benefit from these, it is always a good idea to talk to your doctor or therapist to see in what way how they can help or if they can point you in the right direction for support in these areas.

I still self-harm on a regular basis. However, it is not always severe and I don't self-harm as often. I still end up in A&E often needing stitches but it's been months since I needed surgery. I have support in place and family who help me as well as good friends and of course TeenhHelp. I'm scared about what my future holds for me in terms of self-harm, however, I also know this is my responsibility - it just isn't always that straight forward but I am using my skills and trying my best.

You can click here to go to TeenhHelp's list of alternatives to self-harm. Just remember not everything works for everyone so it's about trial and error and finding what helps you best.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self-harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[hocus pocus]

What do you think of these edits, Jessie?

[Palmolive]

Originally Posted by Cassado;1274520[SIZE="2"

[/size]]What do you think of these edits, Jessie?

Sorry I hadn't seen! Yep they are fine. Would you like me to edit it?

[hocus pocus]

Sure. You can edit it, or if you can't or you're not feeling up to it, you can let me know and I can apply them for you as well.

[hocus pocus]

Jessie has given me permission to apply these edits.

An experience of self-harm
By Jessie (Palmolive)

Living with self-harm can be hard and that's something that I can personally relate to. However, we can learn ways to manage self-harm and to manage the feelings beneath the self-harm itself. Hope will keep you alive, as long as you keep hope alive.

When I was nine, I started self-harming. Honestly, I don't know what the first thought in my head to do it was but I remember it well and it’s scary to think I'm now twenty-two and I still self-harm. Self-harm became severe for me when I was fifteen, which is the time when I had my first admission to a psychiatric ward with thirteen more to follow. Some days can be so hard, others are not so bad but I try hard to use my skills and distractions. I know a lot of people have said to me that the easy way out would be to not self-harm, but that's not the case. I want to stop self-harming but it's hard to do so because of feelings of guilt, not wanting to let people down, punishment, a release of emotions and so on. For me it has led to fourteen hospitalisations, needing medical care such as stitches, staples and surgery. It has even left me physically unwell due to blood loss which caused Anemia to the point of passing out, being sick and having a fit like experience. I remember I used to go in to school with severe wounds from the night before. I was always sent to hospital due to telling a teacher or due to bleeding through my clothing. However, for me the hardest part is the constant battle in my head. I have a side of me where I want to stop and live a life without self-harm but I also have another side of me that feels like I need self-harm in my life in order to manage and deal with situations and even everyday life. I also believe for a lot of people it can become a habit and/or addiction. It can be hard to break the cycle we can get in to with self-harm but it is possible. I feel for myself, that it is certainly an addiction.

I believe I began to self-harm due to my past experiences. I had a lot of things going on for me when I was younger such as being a young carer, living with someone who struggled with anorexia, parents who were mentally unwell, separation of parents, abuse etc, which professionals believe led to me having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I also have been diagnosed with other disorders such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Bulimia, Eating Disorder not otherwise specified (EDNOS), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) tendencies and depressive episodes. These are issues I struggle with on a day to day basis. I know about my disorders but people around struggle to understand these disorders. Having a diagnosis has helped me get certain treatments such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT). I personally dislike being diagnosed with these disorders as I fear people will judge me if they know I am diagnosed with them. However, they have helped me get the correct support and treatment I have desperately needed.

My longest stay in hospital was two and a half years in a unit a 130 miles away from home. This was a unit for women with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) but in my individual therapy, I focused on self-harm after life threatening behaviours and therapy interrupting behaviours. I think this stay in hospital was the hardest. I was first detained under a Section 3 for being a risk to myself. I also was put on maximum observations here for six months and other times but shorter, which is something that had never been in my care plan before. I continued to self-harm in hospital and engage in life threatening behaviours but things slowly began getting better with many ups and downs. I feel like sometimes I really needed to be in hospital, but not always. I also feel like being in hospital so many times for the length of time I have been there, has taught me many new ways to self-harm due to picking up behaviours from other patients. I thought when I was discharged, that I would never self-harm again but I was completely wrong. Since then, I have needed stitches and staples a numerous amount of times, a referral to a burns unit, have had to have surgery more than once and have also had 5 hospital admissions to acute wards. Now I realise that self-harm isn't just something that can go away for me or anyone with issues like myself. It is something I still need to learn to manage and deal with in an appropriate way. Health care professionals have asked me to stop completely, while others have asked me to reduce my self-harm but the truth is, it isn't an easy fight. It's hard and a constant battle. I can be triggered by so many different things on a day to day basis. And the hardest part about it for me is that I feel like I need it but I don’t want to put my family through it any more. My family have gone to the extent of planning my funeral due to the severity of my self-harming. I don’t want to ever put them through this again. I try to focus on the future. If I am in a state, sometimes I will remind myself of the past and where it’s led to in order to encourage myself to keep on fighting.

There is hope. I know so many people who are years free of self-harm and one day I hope to be one of those people and if you also self-harm, then I hope one day you will be one of those people too. And if you are one of those people, then good on you, keep fighting and never be alone because you have come so far to give up now. Recovery isn't easy at all but it is well worth it. However, you have to be ready to stop self-harming and ready to get better. If you don't want to then you won't. If you do want to, then you can and you will but always remember recovery is possible.

Having people support you can be so beneficial. Just having someone to talk to and listen to you can release a lot of intense emotions. I currently have two psychiatric nurses (CPNs) who I see weekly, a support worker, support from my GP every 2-3 weeks, support at University, Crisis team support and a consultant psychiatrist. Using distractions is vital. As long as you're distracting yourself then you are keeping busy. Anything from watching TV, petting pets, going out with a friend, having a bath, doing work, cleaning, going for a run etc, can be beneficial. Also learning new skills to help you manage the urges to harm yourself can be incredibly helpful. Therapies can teach you skills, such as Dialectal Behavioural Therapy (DBT), Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Cognitive Analytic Therapy (CAT). If you are struggling with similar issues and feel you need help and might benefit from these, it is always a good idea to talk to your doctor or therapist to see how they can help or if they can point you in the right direction for support in these areas.

I still self-harm on a regular basis. However, it is not always severe and I don't self-harm as often. I still end up in A&E often needing stitches but it's been months since I needed surgery. I have support in place and family who help me as well as good friends and of course TeenHelp. I'm scared about what my future holds for me in terms of self-harm, however, I also know this is my responsibility - it just isn't always that straight forward but I am using my skills and trying my best.

You can click here to go to TeenHelp's list of alternatives to self-harm. Just remember not everything works for everyone so it's about trial and error and finding what helps you best.

Just know that you are never alone and hope is alive. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way of recovering from self-harm, if you want to recover. Keep fighting for your life and never give in.

[hocus pocus]

This article has been published.