Triggering (SH): addicted to self harm..friends say i need help

[SilentBunny]

So I'm addicted to self harm, I've tried the alternatives...but well I just loose interest and turn to cutting or burning. Or punching trees til my hands bleed. I've talked to my friends about it and my youth leader about it, they give me distraction by talking to me...but id get bored and turn to cutting. My parents nor family knows..nor would I tell them...there's enough going on right now, my sister with her life threatening uncureable disease...has her bday tomorrow...woot :/ my other sister treating me like shit and yelling at her child. And fighting with my mother all the time. Everyone else too busy or doesn't notice.
So yeah I've been cutting for the past 3 months now, and yeah I don't want to stop...but people say I'm doing damage to my body...so yeah. Also, I'm not cutting my wrist or anything, just my legs, arms, and my tongue. Also I love the sight of blood trickling down my arm as I make a fresh cut, just makes me smile.

[Melody]

Hey Jacob! It sounds like you have got a lot going on I right now :\

Self harm can be quite addictive i know from personal experience! but you can get help! I know at this point you think you can't live without it but you can! You dont deserve this!

Have you tried talking to a conuseller? At this point I assume you are in school or college! Every single school has a conuseller and since you are 18 they don't have to tell your parents that way you can get the help you need and deserve without adding any more stress to them if that's the way you wanna go! But if there is any way you can tell them I really think you should! There your parents they love you and they will help you out!

In the meantime if you ever wanna talk pm me! I'm sorry I can't be more help but just know your not alone <3

[hocus pocus]

Hey Jacob

I'm really sorry that you've been feeling like this. It sounds like your family life is really tough right now. You said you've gotten bored with alternatives. I think if you find one hobby that really interests you that you'll keep up with, it can help. Talking to someone when you're triggered can really help you through things, so that's a step in the right direction. Like Jade mentioned, you are an adult and therefore if you wanted to talk to anyone, your parents wouldn't be notified. Don't be afraid to reach out for help. Remember, take it one day at a time.

[SilentBunny]

Ok, so no I'm not in school or college...so that's out of the question for help from a counseller. And knowing it'd be confidential, kept from my parents, is awesome. I've been looking for a counseller or therapist, just someone cheap because I don't want to be shelling out $45-$100+ a month to talk to someone when I could just as easily talk to a hotline for free. (Not saying I will of course, just saying its an option)
And also, I cut deep and need stitches...but how do I go about doing so without getting a huge bill? Or can I just leave it open and wrap it in gauze or bandage it (like I did with my cut on my hand) and let it heal?

[hocus pocus]

I definitely understand that money can be tight. Try looking at Psychology Today; you can search therapists and counselors in your area. In my experience, I went to a bigger, well known therapist office as opposed to a private one. Private ones usually tend to cost more. Do you think you're insurance will cover part of the cost? They may be able to give you a small copay. I wouldn't recommend letting it heal by itself. I think you should check the first aid sticky at the top of the Self Harm forum. If you need stiches, I think you should get them. Health comes before money and I'd rather you be safe than have an infection. If it comes to the point where you can't get stitches, then keep the cut as clean as possible.

Hey Jacob,

There are a few options you could try in order to find a counselor; you could try calling a random counselor and explain your situation to them and see if they know of any low cost counselors in your area or you could google "Low cost counseling [inset hometown here]". When I do the latter for my home town a few items pop up in google and maybe the same thing would happen for you as well. This would at least give you a direction to start calling to get into low cost counseling.

As for needing stitches; I wouldn't recommend letting them heal on their own. The reason it isn't good to leave them to heal on their own is because I have been told that the deeper a wound is the more likely it is to succumb to infection and all of that. You definitely don't want an infection. Here is the first aid sticky and I suggest you look at that.

Jacob, I know seeking help for you self harm can be hard but you are doing a lot of damage to your body and it would be so much better for you to seek help then to continue doing this damage.

I hope this helped and I am wishing you the best of luck.

[SilentBunny]

Ok, ill search up low cost help in my area, hopefully I find something. As for stitches, its probably too late, its been about 15 hours so yeah.

[sydney1999]

I am struggling with self harm and suicidal thoughts right now and maybe i could help you. PM me if you need/want to talk