TeenHelp - When is it enough?

When is it enough? When can I give up and just end it? How much pain and suffering must I go through before people will just let me go. I am not in good health, I have many medical problems I am in and out of hospital and doctor appointments. I was physically and emotionally abused as a child and I have been having flashbacks again and it’s killing me having to relive one of the worst points in my life. I sit there can’t move can’t breathe having a full blown panic attack, scratching myself as hard as I can I would have cut myself but didn’t have anything. These people stole my childhood made me live in fear and I still blame it on myself. I don’t know I guess I just deserve to suffer.

I wish he would have killed me it would have been easier. I just want the pain to stop I can’t do this anymore I think it’s time to end it.

I’m sorry