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suicidal ideation...[VENT]
[SIZE="a"]so...i want to kill myself. have for three years. im telling my therapist tmrw cus idk if imma act on it or not and tbh i expect the hospital again. i don't wanna be fucking alive. i wanna cut and cut and not stop. i want to fucking end everything. i want to stab myself in the chest and watch the blood pour out of my until i die. i don't wanna fucking deal with my mental illness. this all makes my stomach hurt, i wanna kill myself so damn much. i'm honestly expecting another round of inpatient...fucking wonderful. oh ms. marcus would be so disappointed. she said "that's hard work getting out of JC"...and now i'm back there...and probably gonna end up back FUCKING inpatient. fuck my damn life. fuck. everything. god i wish i was dead. i wish i could stab myself. i wish i could hang myself. i wish i could fucking overdose. i wish i could take all the pain away. i'm 20 days clean today...might become 0...
oh...but i know i can't act on it...i know i won't.[/size] |
Re: suicidal ideation...[VENT]
Hello, I am so sorry that you are going through this and I hope that you will be okay soon. Do you have anyone that you can talk to at school about this or a friend or friends parents? Let them know that you are going through this and need some help. I hope you will be okay soon.
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Re: suicidal ideation...[VENT]
[SIZE="a"]i do have friends and sht i cud talk to but im not in school for like a week so i might tell my outpatient program but like i might end up in the hospital for christmas(I'm not religious but I'm forced to celebrate).[/size]
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Re: suicidal ideation...[VENT]
Hi, just try talking to someone when you can. When you talk about what is going on then they will be able to help you to feel better.
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