Triggering (Suicide): My friend told me that they are suicidal

[FONT=""][COLOR=""][SIZE=""]I don’t know what to do. I’ve known them for a long time and knew that they struggle with mental health issues. What should I do? I really don’t want to do/say anything wrong.[/size][/color][/font]

[Arabesque- golfing girl.]

Hello and thank you so much for coming onto Teenhelp and telling us about what has been going on and I'm so sorry about this, hope you all will be okay soon.

When we are friends with someone or someone in our families are having a hard time with something, sometimes it can be hard to talk to them and have them open up to us. A few things that you can try would be, when you are with them you can ask them how are they doing and see what they say back to you. Or if they are not in a talking mood you can try saying something that you are having trouble with, for example say that you are upset with a sibling for taking something of yours and ask them what do they think and say how you will always listen to them no matter what they are going through. You can also add if they want to write a letter or try talking to someone about what they are going through. You can say that talking about what we are going through can be helpful because we are not keeping it all to ourselves and we can start to feel a little bit better when we are talking about it with someone. Also try not to keep asking them what is wrong, let them open up about it when they feel ready. I hope that you all will be okay soon.

[Panda Solo]

Hello there,

I am sorry that you and your friends are going through difficult time right now and thank you so much for reaching out to us. It is totally normal to feel confused and don't know what to do in this situation. When somebody we care so much are going through mental issues, we can feel how they struggle and sincerely want to do something to alleviate their pains. It would be hard for you at this point to confront them directly to address their mental issues but rather you could start from small converstation, as Golfing girl suggests, or share with them first how you have been feeling recently then ask them later how they have been feeling. You could always encourage them to actively seek help when they express hardship or difficulty.

Another important thing is your own feelings and mental health. It is really understandable to be influenced by the emotion turbulance of your cared ones. Yet you being calm, acceptive, open, and supportive along is the greatest help to your friends. I have felt the same pain and depression when my best friend was experiencing serious depressive episode, yet I eventually managed to collect myself together so that I could be a positive influence to support her recovery.

Please try to avoid being overly stressed or worried. Let time do the healing and everything will be okay.

Here are a few websites and resources that might be helpful in your situation.

1. For friends and Family members who experience mental health problems;
https://www.mentalhealth.gov/talk/fr...family-members

2. How to help a friend
https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Te...-Help-a-Friend

3. friendship and mental health
https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to...-mental-health


I sincerely wish the best for you and your friends.

[Mallika]

Hi there,

Thank you for reaching out. It is good that you are concerned about this individual's mental health. Your presence can greatly support them.

I think first and foremost, you could encourage them to meet a psychologist. I'm not sure if they have been diagnosed already, but a professional will be able to take the matter in their hands and direct therapy/treatment as required. If they have been previously diagnosed already, you could remind them to go for their therapy sessions regularly. You are very correct in feeling a sense of emergency and urgency if someone has reached a suicidal point, so seeking help is perhaps the best solution for this person.

Like Panda Solo said, when a loved one is going through such a difficult time, it might take a toll on us too, so please do take care of yourself. There are many ways you can unwind when the circumstances get too overwhelming, because your mental health is of paramount importance too.

Last but not the least, don't feel that their mental health is your responsibility. Yes, you definitely play a very supportive role in their life and it will go a long way in complementing their recovery, but ultimately it is up to the individual to take the right steps for themselves. You can do your best, but don't feel too pressurised to deal with the whole situation.

Take care!

[Dawn.]

Hello there,
I am sorry to hear about you and your friend. It is concerning when someone you know and care about informs you that they are suicidal which can cause you to feel anxious and helpless.
I agree with Mallika in regards to encouraging your friend to see a professional as they may be able to help in regards to their suicidal thoughts. Ensure your friend that you will be there to listen to them as well then they need someone to talk to.
Please know that in order to help your friend, you need to make sure that you are looking after yourself as well. I cannot stress enough that it is of vital important that you can only do your best and you will not be responsible for anything that they do.
If you need anything, please feel free to inbox me.