Do i have depression?

[A-thinker-a-wisher]

Some times I think about self harm. Like it gets really bad to the point where I take something and cause pain to my self with out actually breaking the skin. Sometimes I just feel sad to the point where it is hard to even lift a finger. My mood swings get so hard to control, and my parents don't help either. I stress over school every day, I have A's in all of my classes but math and I have a b in that and they get so mad over every thing, I made a comment that I want to shave one side of my head and they went in to a screaming fit telling me I would regret it and I would never get a job ( I am 13 and hair will grow back). And my older niece has anxiety and depression and my sister told her that she should be ashamed and after my nieces suicide attempt my sister got angry and shamed her and would not get her help because my sister was ashamed by the fact my niece has depression. and I could only wonder how my dad would act. And my mom calls my friend bad names behind her back because she also has anxiety. And I am also scared because a few months ago I made a joke about cutting trying to lighten the mood after telling my best friend all of the above and she told the counselor and the counselor was required to call my parents and my parents got mad because I spilled out my emotions. But my head is barely above water and I am about to give in to cutting I just feel so hopeless and I don't want to trouble any one. help me.

[hocus pocus]

We're not professionals, so we can't tell you for sure if you have depression, but it does sound like you're struggling with it. You have to feel bad to want to harm yourself in the way you're considering doing it.

It seems like your parents don't want you to talk about how you're feeling. A lot of people's parents are like that as they tend to be old fashion and they believe that, "your business is your business." However, not talking about how you're feeling can make you feel worse than you already do. Since your counselor is aware of your thoughts about self-harming (due to the joke) maybe you can try to talk to her about how you're feeling. You might want to consider asking her about the confidentiality policies, but I know that once my parents initially knew about my self-harm, they felt there was no need to tell them again. If you don't want to talk to her, talk to someone else you trust. You can consider keeping a journal or a blog as well. Just remember that what you're feeling is nothing to be ashamed of.

Take a look at some alternatives to self-harm. There are a lot here, and different things work for different people, but they're all worth a try. Once you find some that work for you, you might benefit from writing them down. Also, remember distractions are temporary, whereas coping skills can be used to replace the behavior all together. If you find yourself wanting to cut during a certain time, for instance, you can fill that time period with something else each day.

we are not professionals but I can give you my opinion.

For the self-harm even though you do not open your skin it is still considered self harm. Self-harm is when you inflict pain to yourself whether it is biting, scratching, cutting, burning, or just digging your nails into your skin. I would do as Cassie and check out the alternatives thread for self-harm.

Like Cassie said it sounds like your parents and sister don't want you to talk about your feelings. I think it would be a good idea to sit your family down and just tell them what your feeling and say that even though they feel like mental health is a bad thing. think you just need to sit down with them and tell them your feelings.

If you even need to talk just PM/VM me.

[Palmolive]

Hi there,

I'm sorry you're going through this. But so glad you've come to us for some help.

It sounds like you're family aren't very supportive in regards to mental health and that must be really hard for you considering you're struggling. You can sit them down and try and talk to them if you want but either way I think you should seek help from someone else such as a school counsellor, your doctor or a teacher. These people really do care and can help you and I want you to have that support network because it can be so vital to recovery. I used to have a lot of support from school and it literally saved my life. I wouldn't be where I am today with out the teachers I had. Just have a think about it. I know reaching out can be hard and talking to people and being honest can be hard but it can be well worth it. Also if you struggle to talk the. You could always write something down instead. I know that's helped me a lot in the past.

Have a look at the alternatives to self harm that cassie has given to you. I know they can get tiring but they can be really helpful and keep us busy which is ultimately keeping you safe. And that's important in this, you being safe. So things like colouring, writing, running, playing games, being with friends, coming online, petting pets, cleaning pets out, reading, music, art, etc are all good things to try but there are loads of ideas in the link you've been given.

Also get your emotions out. Blogging on here can be really helpful for me so that might be something you want to think about or you can always keep a journal too. I also do that and find it helpful. And then if there's someone you begin to trust, you can even show them entries you've made if you want too. It's just good to get your emotions out instead of self harming.

Self harming doesn't help and you don't deserve it. You are worth so, so much more than that and I hope one day you can recognise that for yourself but until then we'll keep reminding you of it. And please come to us for support whenever you need any help because we're always going to be here. We're not going anywhere and want to se you through this and help you. Okay?mstay strong and stay fighting. We're rooting for you my friend.

Hope and wishes,
Jessie