depression, eating disorder, chronic illness, university and other stuff

[Evanesco]

I disappeared for a couple of weeks. I'm really sorry about that, I've been unwell (more so than usual), then had my family visit, plus had a deadline to hit.

I'm having a really rough time at the moment. Depression has reared its ugly head again and I'm not sure how to cope. And my eating disorder is in relapse, with heavy restricting one week, binging non stop the next, rinse and repeat.

I've had cognitive behaviour therapy before. It did nothing for me, but that was when I was a teenager. I'm an adult now. I'm wondering if therapy might be a good thing to try again. I'm really finding it difficult to cope and have felt suicidal more than usual. But I'm worried about a few things.

a) That it will interfer with my treatment for my chronic illnesses. I have ME and fibro. The treatment I've been offered is psychologically based. I'm not sure whether it's a good idea to be seeking mental health treatment at this time. The doctors here usually say you have either ME or depression, not both - this is bullshit, one is physical and one is mental, but I'm scared that I'll end up with no treatment for anything or the wrong treatment.

b) That adult psych services are worth getting involved with if you're 'just' depressed. Now, I'm under the opinion that I actually have a couple of other mental illnesses/disorders. I won't go into them here because that's speculative and self diagnosing. I think, however, if I was going to speak to someone who wasn't just my general gp (who is oblivious to everything) that I would get diagnosed. But anyway, I've been told by friends with BPD, OCD etc to stay away from psych services if it's just depression.

I think I had a third thing but I have memory problems and I've forgotten it...

[Celyn]

Hey, really sorry to hear how you have been feeling and trying to deal with everything. I hope you feel a little bit better now.

Therapy is always worth another go, particularly since you have grown and developed since the last time you had therapy.

I agree with you- it is entirely possible to have both ME and depression, not one or the other. Even though you have a physical illness there may be therapy that will help you to change how you feel about your illness. If it interferes, it should only be in a positive way. You could look for therapists who have knowledge of 'gate control therapy' as this can help those with depression, anxiety etc., or chronic pain deal with physical pain. Don't be afraid to ask a therapist whether they have had experience of clients with ME either- it's important that you have someone who understands you as a person, as well as any health issues you have and how it affects how you feel.

It's always worth getting therapy, no matter how 'small' you think your issues are. If the issues bother you, then it's definitely worth talking about, no matter what your friends think. Even mild forms of depression are better managed with therapy rather than just minimising and ignoring it, hoping it goes away. Sometimes, without help, the depression may linger, or get worse. It's also helpful to get therapy if you suspect other mental health issues and whilst a doctor can't diagnose you, they can refer you to a psychiatrist or psychologist who can diagnose you.

Hope you get help and feel better soon