Depression.

[~Shelby~]

I think this is probably the first anything I've ever posted on here in the like year or two I've been here. I don't know if that's good or bad. Lately I've just been so awful and I feel like I'm going back to how I used to be in 8th grade. Depressed, suicidal, etc. I can't seem to want to get out of bed anymore, my grades are miserable, I don't ever want to move from my room, and everything is falling apart. I don't think my girlfriend is happy with me and honestly I don't know how to feel about that. I don't know what to do. I haven't felt so bad in a while and I can't really talk to anyone. The adults will send me back to the hospital and the only place my dad and insurance will allow me to go to is disgusting and didn't help one bit and it was pretty terrifying. I want to go to the hospital but I can't because of my insurance and it's just not going well. I don't even know if this is to seek help or to vent but thank you anyone who took the time to read it.

[lightfeet]

I know how you feel.... Stay strong! <3 try to do anything that gets your mind off of it. Thats what i do.

Hi, Shelby.

[Edited]

Sorry about how you're feeling and about what's going on. I can imagine things are pretty hard for you right now, especially since you're confused about your girlfriend. Added stress and confusion and sadness, right? Can you talk to your girlfriend about this and tell how you've been feeling? Or at least a school counselor or friend maybe?

Since you've been through this before, you got through it. So don't give up, okay? You can get through this again and come out stronger. You've already been through a lot so it's not worth giving up right now, trust me. You've got people around who love and care a lot about you whether you believe it or not. They'd be pretty devastated without you there. I know it's hard, but try those little things like getting out of the bed. Motivate yourself, get yourself some help and help yourself while you still can. You deserve to be happy, make that a goal. Do things that make you happy and try to cheer yourself up.

You can get through this. Don't give up now, beautiful. I'm here if you need someone to talk to. Hope you feel better soon!

Stay Strong <3

[~Shelby~]

Thanks guys. I've tried talking to her but she doesn't really know how to help because she's sad when I'm sad so it kind of just doesn't work. I also can never talk to my school counselor. It just...doesn't work well for me when I do that. But again, thank you. I will continue trying.