I can't tell if not caring is a GOOD thing or a BAD thing. Maybe a bit of both.

Good, I guess, is that normally in gym I'd be so embarrassed by how sucky I am at everything, but right now I could care less.

But I could care less about grades or anything either. I left a good portion of my science test blank because I just didn't even want to try to find the right answers because it was hard. Don't care if I fail anyway because she lets us retake. Making minimal to no...

I'm an agnostic. I'm not proud of it any more than I'm ashamed of it. It's just my own personal belief structure. Doesn't affect the way I live my life for the most part, while I have a personal moral and ethical framework it isn't directly related to my spirituality and beliefs.

I would also like to point out that these are my beliefs, and they may not apply to anyone else. That doesn't stop me talking about them, of course, but I'd like everyone to consider these in the context...

I feel lost, adrift in a sea of my own thoughts and emotions. Every day I feel a part of me slipping away. More and more I feel crushed beneath my growing cynicism. I do not even know why I am feeling this way or what triggered these feelings. I just do not know how to stop. Last night for the first time in a very long time, I thought about suicide again. I didn’t think about it in a depressed point of view. I didn’t feel like I was trapped and it was my only way out or anything like that. I just...

Couldn't even make fourteen days.

Found a razor in my room that I thought I had lost, and I couldn't just sort of throw it away. I put it in my pocket. Several hours later, see a hand towel with a red stain on it. Pull out razor, begin to cut.

I couldn't even make 2 weeks.

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There are two scheduled discussions on the topic of finding hope and thinking positively in the Chat Room for users to seek advice and share thoughts and ideas! The first discussion will be held at 8pm UK time (GMT) and the second will be held at 8pm Central US time (CST). All...

I just don't get some people.
There are these 2 people that get my bus sometimes. I hate them. One of them in the year below. The other one is in my year, and he self-harms. I'm honestly not being horrible or anything, but I'm 99% sure its for attention. He's the only person in my year who *openly* self-harms, but whenever he does he either wears short sleeved clothes, or rolls up long sleeves (always on arms), even when its freezing. He then goes on and on about it. Like, non stop.
...

Need to sleep before school tomorrow.
I've decided I'm going clean for 2 weeks. I really want to do it and I'll be so pleased if I do. I dont know how I'm going to feel after school though. If my mum goes to see my nan then I may go straight into town before home so I don't have access to anything to cut with.
Ah well...

No matter how many love songs you listen to, it doesn't change the fact that you are alone. Absolutely alone.

My Best Friend/Brother just broke down and went to live with his brother but gave his phone to someone else and deleted his fb... he moved a while back.. idk if he is ok and its driving me crazy. the only person who has talked to him in the least 2 weeks wont talk to me and hates me and idk why.. i need to know he is ok but i have no way how... idk what to do with that.. today kinda sucked. my bf was being awesome to me today on the upside but all in all it kinda sucked.... i need my brother...

Back home now
Just before coming home today, I threw my razor into the sea. It was strange watching it go. Now that I'm home I could always just get another, but at least I wasn't paranoid all day about dropping my phone, so the case would come off, and a razor would skid along the floor with a list of reasons reminding me why I shouldn't SH.
Back to school now on Monday. Mixed feelings about that. On the one hand, I'm still getting used to the feeling of being around people that...