i don't even know how i feel right now.. nor do i know why i'm really writing this. so many ups and downs that its all a jumble. last week i cut worse than i had in a while and i think it might be infected, i put antibiotic on it but its not gonna heal for a while.

the only thing that keeps me sane right now if music. everything else makes me anxious , i don't know why.. i feel as if i'm on the verge of a panic attack all the time.

i've learned recently that anyone...

Can't do this. Really can't do this. I'm so stupid and won't make it anywhere in life and ugh. Cried like twice today and it put my brain in such a haze. It always makes me so tired and sick feeling to cry. I can't think. I can't type. I just want to curl up and sleep. Getting a headache from the stress I'm under.

Skipped out on therapy on Friday because I just wanted to go home. I hope she still calls me down at some point this week. I she doesn't by Friday I'll probably give in...

Holy crap, it's like January 20th. I've been in respite since the evening of the 8th, so nearly two weeks now. My mood still hasn't lifted and the content of my thoughts is still highly destructive. It will probably be at least a fortnight before I'm properly active again. I am making attempts to check TH at least once a day, but as those of you with your own experiences if very severe depression will be aware, things get overwhelming very fast.

Anyway I thought I'd just update you...

It all hit me again. 65 in science isn't going to get improved because I realized from the start of everything that I can't do it and have more work for that class loaded on top of me to add on to all of it. Fun. Spent the other night crying because I realized how much of a failure I really am. Haven't studied. Any time I think about it I cry.

Math: Apparently what we are doing has a lot of "simple algebra" in it. Simple? God. I can't even do any of it.

...

I'm on holiday!
We came to Whinfell Forest for the weekend for my mum's birthday and it's pretty awesome. At the moment I'm just chilling myself at the villa we're staying in with some good music and a nice cold vodka. Bliss!
The villa is alright but seriously, my brother and I share a room and the storage space equates to one shelf and six hangers in a really tiny cupboard. Sooooo yeah. Couldn't really stay here longer than a weekend due to the fact there is no space for anything....

Source: Newsletter | Issue 46 | If you would like to receive the full quality HTML version via email please sign up.

TeenHelp Newsletter

TeenHelp Newsletter #46 - January 18th 2014 - http://www.teenhelp.org

Welcome to the TeenHelp Newsletter! Our Newsletter contains a lot of useful information about our current work, including updates to our site and services, work with our partners and affiliates, details of upcoming events, short...

Source: Notice | Facilitated Chat Room Discussions.


There are two scheduled discussions on the topic of facing the challenges of growing up in the Chat Room for users to seek advice and share thoughts and ideas! The first discussion will be held at 8pm UK time (GMT) and the second will be held at 8pm Central US time (CST). All you...

So first things first: I can't actually feel my fingers right now.
On Monday night around 11/12 I decided to try knitting again. Every time I try I get it wrong and my stitches are so tight I can't move them along the needle. Cue throwing needles to the ground and sulking. So I was sitting on my bed, watching Broadchurch, giving it another go, when I looked at what I was doing and thought "Hang on, maybe that's what I'm doing wrong. If I loop it round that way it might work."...

I can't tell if not caring is a GOOD thing or a BAD thing. Maybe a bit of both.

Good, I guess, is that normally in gym I'd be so embarrassed by how sucky I am at everything, but right now I could care less.

But I could care less about grades or anything either. I left a good portion of my science test blank because I just didn't even want to try to find the right answers because it was hard. Don't care if I fail anyway because she lets us retake. Making minimal to no...

I'm an agnostic. I'm not proud of it any more than I'm ashamed of it. It's just my own personal belief structure. Doesn't affect the way I live my life for the most part, while I have a personal moral and ethical framework it isn't directly related to my spirituality and beliefs.

I would also like to point out that these are my beliefs, and they may not apply to anyone else. That doesn't stop me talking about them, of course, but I'd like everyone to consider these in the context...