I'm at a good place about my sexuality right now. I can't think about it too much or I do get worried and upset. So I'm trying not to think about it. For my own sake, I think I'm gonna stay out of the LGBT forum for a while. And try not to think about it too much because it doesn't matter right now.

Today has just been an overall stressful day.

Things with my best friend have been shaky, and that in itself has made this whole week hard.

I'm about 96% sure I failed my chemistry test, which will only bring my grade down even more. Which I can hardly afford right now. In fact just now as I was typing this, my mom came in my room with a letter from the school saying I'm in danger of failing, with graduation just 3 weeks away.

Once the bell rang to go home,...

The switchfoot concert was awesome!!!!!!!
I had such a good time. That band is truly an amazing group of people.
and I just wanted to say that my mom is the best, she is he strongest person I know and she is always there for me and everyone else in my family I love her so much and she's the reason Im somewhat sane today haha
Lauren

SOOOOOOO tomorrow i am leaving on a plane getting out for the weekend and doing something that matters to me.
I am going to a SWITCHFOOT concert!!!
My favorite band in the history of the world and I cant wait another second!
I also cant wait to just leave for the weekend I need a break from friends and questions. And what a better way to do it.
This band is amazing and have changed my life for the better. They constantly give me a new perspective. I cant wait...

I feel weighed down lately more than I ever have before
I feel like I am living my life for the people around me, but thats who I am, I am a people pleaser I like the people around me to be happy in hopes of making myself happy
and now im shrinking myself
I just wish that I was as happy with the way my life is as others are happy about the way my life is
Right now its just not me I need to do something thats my own and because I want to on my own terms
Thats...

I haven't been my motorcycle since December when I last dropped it. It was a few days after getting my license and I simply lost control for a split second. But that's all it takes. When I got home that day, my dad was pretty pissed that I dumped the bike and that only added to the guilt. So since then, I haven't picked up my bike in fear of doing more damage to it.

When I got home, I walked past the motorcycle and I felt pretty bad for neglecting it for so long. So I got back on,...

idk where to go...i know im supposed to stay and live but idk if i am able to anymore...i stick out as long as i can and well, i dont think i can stick it out anymore...its way too stressful for me now...im only a teen...i shouldnt be struggling with all the stuff im struggling with right now...hmmm...i am struggling with wether or not to believe God really exists anymore to me or not...just tryin to think he is but its really hard to know he loves me and he really cares that i live a life...

The other day, I got a request from a friend to keep her company at a wedding. Despite the fact that I don't particularly enjoy weddings, I agreed to go since I knew the bride. (...and of course since I wasn't going to prom, my Saturday was wide open) So we get there and as I'm sitting there, I realize that the reason I don't fully enjoy weddings is because every one I go to is essentially the same....

As the bride walks down the isle, everyone marvels at how beautiful she looks, and...

lost
empty
cold
scared
fighted
annoyed
angry
stupid
dumb
pathetic
worthless
helpess
a whast of space

i know i say stuff like this alot but i needed to vent this i how i would discribe maself and wat the bullies call me hough they add a swear word infront of them

So since this is el primero (the first), I am deciding to write a little about me and my sitch. So the other blogs after this wont seem completely sketchy.
I am Lauren, I want my name to be Avery but im not going to change it. You can call me Avery though, I tell people at starbucks and jamba juice thats what my name is.

Ok life story,
I grew up for about 7 years of my life without my dad in my life, he had a drug problem. My mom was at work all day and I was left...