I'm going to a summer camp thing for the weekend, Debbie wants me to be more social. It's called "Summer Sunshine Fun Camp" Jesus Christ, More like "Hell on Earth". I begged her not to make me go, But she said it would be good for me. So "I can make new friends". She's trying to kill me, I swear. Do they even let you smoke at summer camp ?
Oh and I was looking at the forums and She made a question about me:\ I wasn't sure wether I should say something or not....

I had to put a condom on a dildo in front of the whole class today.
After my day of drugs, alcohol and 2 sex ed classes, I've decided drugs/alcohol are not a bad thing but sex sucks and something I never want to do.
I'm over half way through my life and I never had sex so I don't see why I would want to change that!

Today was good and bad.
I went shopping with Blake and got Jamie a spiderman game for playstation2. (His birthday is in a couple days) I also applied at a couple places for a job. After we went shopping me and Blake took Jamie to the lake down the road. I brought my camera with me just to take pictures. I was hoping to post them. But I was standing on a rock trying to take a picture and clumsy ol' me slipped and fell in the water. Oh and I can't swim. There was a little old lady laughing...

I want to overdose. I feel so alone, what would it matter if I was gone? Things would improve around here. No one would care.

I haven't got the guts. Not while there's a chance my sisters could find my body.

So I guess I'm hanging on. Wondering why nobody can help me. I'm too nice. Too nice to cut when they've asked me not to. Too nice to take my life when it could hurt them. Too nice to break down and cry because they have it worse than me.

But I'm dying...

I need someone to talk to. Someone to confide in. Because there is no one I can talk to properly.

I want to cut. I don't know why. I've felt fine all day and now suddenly I want to cut.

And excercise. A lot.

But I can't do either.

I need to talk to someone about how I feel but I've got no one.

I wish I could get help.

I wish I could tell someone how I feel.

I wish the feelings would go away.

But then I wish I could destroy myself.

I can't get help until I get worse.

Is it worth living in this half life forever, or is it worth getting worse so someone can help me get better?

Source: Announcements forum | Thread.


TeenHelp has been having a bit of a hard time lately - it's got terrible acne, has found hair in new places, and is struggling to get a girlfriend and/or boyfriend! Having survived the perils of childhood, TeenHelp is now ready to embark on the challenges of adolescence as it celebrates its thirteenth birthday!

In the last thirteen years TeenHelp has accomplished a lot. Rising as ...

My therapist told me I should have cut off connections with her because she's part of my "dark" past. (His words, not mine) It's times like these I really wish I would have listened. But I have to get past it, Jamie is watching my every move:\
I will admit I started smoking heavily now. I try not to around Jamie. It seems like my entire life revolves around someone else.
-When I was little all I did was try to please my dad.
-As I got older all I did was think about...

Spent the day in bed today. Not been that well, really. Dozing on and off and watching crappy TV.
Had a headache and mum said to take paracetamol because apparently ibuprofen is too strong. Told them that because the paracetamol wasn't sugar coated it'd make me sick but they said I'd be fine.
So now I'm sat on my bed, not only feeling bad, but now I feel like throwing up too. Fml.
They just think I'm being fussy. But honestly, if they had to taste something that horrible every...