Bitch, please.

I've happened to notice a wide variety of girls starting to call themselves bitches.
You know them. They wear too-tight t shirts stretched across their breasts with words like "You say BITCH like it's a bad thing."

If you'll navigate to their facebook page, they'll happily tell you that they stick wiv der frens. They'll tell you that yeah, they are a bitch, if a bitch means having an attitude and being opinionated.

They'll tell it like it is, but don't you tell them how it is unless you like being hit.

The previously mentioned 'Opinionated' and 'Attitude' seem to be the big offenders in allowing this travesty to happen.

While once someone may have said "I'm very opinionated on my countries immigration policy" it seems to have been replaced with more of a context such as; "I'm very opinionated on your face you ugly slag!"

I have an attitude. An attitude of a very bored person who wants to go put on a snuggy and eat tiny teddys. You have an attitude of someone who is wondering why they are still reading.

Are we at the point where we just announce random things we all possess as humans and pretend it means something?


I have a thought, yo.


Now honesty, that's a repeat offender as well. I've come to notice a lot of my conversations seem to go down like this;

"You just called my friend a hairy walrus. Why are you being such a bitch?"

"Hey, man, I'm just telling the truth. Would you rather me lie?"

Why yes Socially Innapropriate Ingrid, I would prefer you to lie. Your bitchy friends may value your particular brand of honesty sniggering at 'fatties' in the mall, but they aren't going to appreciate it when you tell them to "put down that fucking donut, sumo."

Then you have this awkwardness, and they'll be all, "Why are you being such a bitch?" and you'll be all "Hey, I'm just being honest." and the friend that used to make fun of old people with you will tell you how it's just gone all too far.

You're not such a hot shot either, she'll say. With your parachute pants and cap on backwards.

And you'll wonder why someone is being so blunt and hurtful.

I'll tell you why.

It's because your a bitch! And she's a bitch!

It's not a good thing.


So I put forward to you brothers and sisters, we take back the word! If someone tells you how cool they are for being a bitch tell them you've noticed that they are.

I will not stand for this injustice any longer!