Should Have Known
Posted April 27th 2016 at 09:36 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
I mentioned recently that I got a message from an ex. The message implied I was immature and accused me of dishonesty. She wanted answers but was happy to make assumptions before I even responded. I've had enough of being insulted and manipulated by people so I have absolutely no intention of replying to that message.
This week I got a message from, I'll just call her a 'relative' of this ex, since I'm sworn to secrecy or whatever other shit I don't care about. I got on well with this relative and she's sensible and down to earth. I knew fine well the only reason she was talking to me was to ask the same thing my ex did, but I talked anyway because she was actually being nice and I thought she would see where I was coming from. Lol. As if. I answered her question and she hasn't bothered responding since.
They can share my response between themselves and have a nice little bitching session about what an immature little kid I am. I know them, and I know that they'll see something I needed to do for my own wellbeing as an immature and selfish move.
Frankly, I don't care. If people can't accept something completely harmless that you need to do for yourself, then they're simply not worth it.
I am worth more than other people's assumptions and negativity.
I deserve better than being manipulated and made to be the bad guy. It's happened too many times in my life and, God, I'm actually ashamed. I keep remembering situations and conversations and things that happened and, well fuck. I had no self-respect, I just bowed down to people and let them walk over me.
I feel free. Realising this and accepting that I AM a good person and I DO have worth is pretty cathartic. I am happy with where I am in life. I have goals and aspirations and even if I don't know exactly what I want to do yet, I'm perfectly happy making a good living and studying a subject I love. I don't need anything else right now.
If someone really cares about you and your wellbeing, they won't make you feel bad about yourself or the way you live your life.
It takes too many people far too long to realise this.
This week I got a message from, I'll just call her a 'relative' of this ex, since I'm sworn to secrecy or whatever other shit I don't care about. I got on well with this relative and she's sensible and down to earth. I knew fine well the only reason she was talking to me was to ask the same thing my ex did, but I talked anyway because she was actually being nice and I thought she would see where I was coming from. Lol. As if. I answered her question and she hasn't bothered responding since.
They can share my response between themselves and have a nice little bitching session about what an immature little kid I am. I know them, and I know that they'll see something I needed to do for my own wellbeing as an immature and selfish move.
Frankly, I don't care. If people can't accept something completely harmless that you need to do for yourself, then they're simply not worth it.
I am worth more than other people's assumptions and negativity.
I deserve better than being manipulated and made to be the bad guy. It's happened too many times in my life and, God, I'm actually ashamed. I keep remembering situations and conversations and things that happened and, well fuck. I had no self-respect, I just bowed down to people and let them walk over me.
I feel free. Realising this and accepting that I AM a good person and I DO have worth is pretty cathartic. I am happy with where I am in life. I have goals and aspirations and even if I don't know exactly what I want to do yet, I'm perfectly happy making a good living and studying a subject I love. I don't need anything else right now.
If someone really cares about you and your wellbeing, they won't make you feel bad about yourself or the way you live your life.
It takes too many people far too long to realise this.
Total Comments 2
Comments
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Posted April 28th 2016 at 07:12 AM by obelus -
Posted April 29th 2016 at 05:41 AM by hocus pocus